Why Researchers Are Misunderstood…

1. Why Researchers Are Misunderstood… Willard Hom, Director Research & Planning System Office, California Community Colleges

2. Report on Our Out-of-focus Groups… • Using a grant from the No-Researcher Left Behind Act, a team of social scientists recently completed a qualitative study (in this case, not to be confused with a quality study).

3. Methodology • Establishments in the study were from a judgment sample (those with the best beer selection). • Over beers and pretzels, etcetera, we sought opinions from the general public about researchers.

4. Some Data Captured • Here are selected comments about researchers that we recorded in this study.

5. They’re really pretty because…. • they’re always modeling.

6. They’re really Machiavellian because… • they’re always plotting.

7. They’re nonpartisan because… • they usually use two-sided tests.

8. They’re very demanding Type A people because… • they believe in control groups.

9. They meet the usual expectations because… • they like normal distributions.

10. They seem to know how much we sleep because… • they compute z-scores.

11. They don’t get ahead because… • they’re always regressing.

12. They’re really into honesty and truth because… • they always check out-liers.

13. They must be productive collaborators in the office because… • they talk so much about co-efficients.

14. They seem to have a culture linked to the Brits because… • They frequently do t-tests.

15. They must be wrong a lot of the time because… • they have standard errors.

16. And finally, • Their work seems to be much ado about nothing because… • they fixate about a null hypothesis.

17. Conclusion • Hug your researcher. • OK. That’s getting too close; buy them lunch sometime… • In the interest of full disclosure, we attest that the study was extremely biased, and we admit, the glass was never half full…