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Explore the dynamics of bullying, from identifying bullies and victims to long-term impacts and strategies for prevention. Learn how to address bullying effectively with supportive adults and practical techniques.
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Talking about Bullying
What Is Bullying? • Bullying is an act of repeated aggressive behavior in order to intentionally hurt or intimidate another person. • Can be physical, verbal and/or emotional. • Bullying can be overt (i.e., teasing, hitting, or stealing); boys are most often overt bullies. • Bullying can covert (i.e., spreading rumors or exclusion); girls are most often covert bullies.
Who Are Bullies? • It is difficult to generalise when “profiling” bullies. • Some bullies are arrogant and demonstrate strong self-esteem. They feel they have the right to assert their dominance. • They enjoy being in control.
Who Are Bullies? (continued) • Other bullies have very low self-esteem and use bullying to hide shame and anxiety. • They victimise and dominate others, so that they feel empowered themselves.
Who Are Bullies? (continued) • Bullies often come from homes that use physical punishment to discipline. • Caregivers of bullies are typically uninvolved and lack warmth. • Children who bully are often defiant toward authority figures and are apt to break rules.
Who Are The Victims of Bullying? • Children who are bullied are often insecure, socially isolated, anxious, and have low self-esteem. • They are unlikely to defend themselves or retaliate. • They are viewed as “weaker” than their peers.
Who Are The Victims of Bullying? (Continued) • Parents of children who are bullied are often overprotective or enmeshed with their children. • Children who are bullied perceive parent or teacher intervention to be ineffective and are unlikely to report the problem.
Adult Responses To Bullying • Bullying is sometimes perceived as a harmless rite of passage that all children will experience. • Unless bullying is likely to lead to physical injury, many adults believe it is best left to be resolved by children and their peers.
Long-Term Implications of Bullying • Children who are severe bullies are likely to experience legal or criminal problems as adults. • Children can carry bullying behaviors into adulthood and experience difficulty in forming and maintaining relationships.
Long-Term Implications of Being Bullied • Children who are severely bullied often experience low self-esteem and depression even into adulthood. • Children who are bullied perceive school as an unsafe place and as a result, their education is negatively affected.
Long-Term Implications of Being Bullied (continued) • In extreme cases, bullying can lead to victims committing suicide or murdering their aggressors.
Strategies to deal with bullying • Talk about it. • Tell an adult you trust. Teachers, counsellors and parents can all help stop bullying. • They can also offer some helpful suggestions to deal with the situation.
Possible strategies to deal with bullying • If you can - confront the bully. • Be assertive. Speak to the bully calmly but firmly and let them know what they are doing is wrong and must stop. • Stand your ground. Bullies expect people to back down, so they may be thrown off balance if you challenge them and stick up for yourself.
Strategies to deal with bullying • Sometimes it’s better to walk away. • Practice ways to ignore the hurtful remarks, like acting uninterested or texting someone on your cell phone. • By ignoring the bully, you're showing that you don't care. The bully may get bored with trying to bother you.
Strategies to deal with bullying • Hold the emotions. It's natural to get upset by the bully, but that's what some bullies thrive on. It makes them feel more powerful. • Try not reacting like crying, or getting angry. Sometimes the best thing to do is to wear a "poker face" until you are clear of any danger (smiling or laughing may provoke the bully).
Strategies to deal with bullying • If you are waiting for an adult to address the issue, but are in contact with the bully at school, avoid the bully and use the buddy system. • Use a different bathroom if a bully is nearby and don't go to your locker when there is nobody around. • Make sure you have someone with you so that you're not alone with the bully.
For More Information About Bullying Visit: • National Parent information Network www.npin.org • Educators for Social Responsibility www.benjerry.com/esr/about~esr.html • Bullying in Schools and What to do About it http://www.education.unisa.edu.au/bullying • Anti-Bullying Network http://www.antibullying.net
References: • ERIC (1997). What should parents and teachers know about bullying? [Brochure]. US Department of Education. • Sjostrom, L., & Stein, N. (1996). Bullyproof. Washington, DC: Wesley College Center for Research on Women. • Sharp, S., & Smith, P.K. (Eds.). (1994). Tackling bullying in your school. New York, NY: Routledge.