RADM Sandra Kweder, MD, FACP US Public Health Service Office of New Drugs, FDA

1. Effective Communication Gets Results RADM Sandra Kweder, MD, FACP US Public Health Service Office of New Drugs, FDA

2. Communication and Negotiation are related • Bidirectional • Must adapt to situation context • Interpersonal skills essential • Require iteration and continuous modification • High level of skill essential for strong leadership • Gender neutral

3. HHS Leadership Core Competency “Interpersonal Skills” Considers and responds appropriately to the needs, feelings, and capabilities of different people in different situations

4. 8 Key Behaviors • Listens attentively to peoples’ ideas and concerns • Responds to others’ verbalized concerns and feelings • Asks questions to clarify others’ concerns and feelings • Plans and prepares by anticipating others’ reactions • Uses non-verbal cues and body language to identify and interpret others’ concerns and feelings • Responds to others’ unspoken concerns and feelings • Acknowledges others’ concerns and feelings, in spite of disagreement • Approaches others about sensitive issues in non-threatening ways

5. Proficiency Levels Who do you know who meet these? • Expert: Models, leads, trains, and motivates multiple levels of personnel to be excellent in interpersonal awareness. • Advanced: Habitually uses non-verbal cues and body language to interpret others’ feelings and respond to their unspoken concerns, acknowledges others’ concerns in spite of disagreement, and approaches others about sensitive issues in non-threatening ways. • Intermediate: Usually uses non-verbal cues and body language to interpret others’ feelings and respond to their unspoken concerns, acknowledges others’ concerns in spite of disagreement, and approaches others about sensitive issues in non-threatening ways. • Basic: Sometimes listens attentively and responds to peoples’ concerns and feelings, asks questions to clarify them, and plans and prepares by anticipating others’ reactions. • Awareness: Demonstrates common knowledge or understanding of interpersonal awareness, but may avoid or miss opportunities to elicit, notice, interpret, and anticipate others’ concerns and feelings

6. Case Study – how would your react? • George is charged with writing a policy document that affects multiple offices in the organization. He receives many comments, with one that is especially negative. He doesn’t agree. He submits the paper forward without addressing the concern with the person or office who submitted it. • The negative comment is yours. What are you thinking? • What would you do? • George is your boss • George is your peer • You are George’s boss

7. Goals of this Session • Recognize what your limiting perceptions are and how they are formed • Understand negative and positive intention • Consider Tools to transform negative perceptions into productive behaviors including “Real Conversations” • Learn something about yourself • Consider how you utilize and develop communication skills

8. Communication • Bidirectional – not just broadcasting a message • Listening is critical How you listen paints a picture of the speaker – and will direct your actions • What is your filter or wall?

9. How do you listen?Assuming intent… Positive Intent – Yours and Theirs What is thought and felt What is said and done • Your filter or wall is a choice • It is affected by who you are and where you fit in the relationship. • It is an assumption of intent • George acted as he did because _______. • Assuming positive intent is a key principle of how a good leader communicates – and negotiates.

10. Do you … see negative intent? When someone begins to speak…are you • Hunting for clues? • What is wrong with that person? • Looking for differences among views to take a side? • Seeking to judge? • “He did this because he loves being difficult.” • Do you tend to – • Attack – “He is such an instigator.” • Condescend or dismiss – “He’s a jerk and not very bright.” • Be defensive and protecting of your view? Organizational cultures often foster this. If yours does, DON”T.

11. Do you…see positive intent ? The bedrock of good interpersonal skills – assume it. • Find– or invent – an intent that person wants to be constructive? • “He probably intended to talk with me and never got to it.” • “I don’t know why he acted that way, but I know that he wants this to be done right.” • Be curious? • Why would he act that way when he knows he can come to me? • Seek to understand world from his or her perspective? • No matter how difficult? Hint: Culture of origin may matter, but don’t assume

12. Seeing intent requires self awareness When things go awry, how do you react? What do you see in the mirror? What triggers your emotions? Hits your wall?

13. Good interpersonal skills, require one to be SELF AWARE • Emotion is commonly part of our own wall and it makes for a hard wall • Contagious • Anger is #1 • Defenses kick in quickly – watch out • Emotion is DRAMA • Check your emotion before it overtakes you • No room for drama in high quality communications • Drama when trying to negotiate is risky – signals loss of situation control. • Strong leaders don’t employ drama

14. Leadership Triangles Model of Behavior Leadership Drama

15. Behaviors vs interpersonal skills? • Behaviors of leaders are a reflection of their ability to employ constructive interpersonal skills • Every behavior is a choice • We all have our own tendencies in making those choices • Positive, leadership oriented skills and behaviors – or not

16. The Drama Triangle DRAMA DRAMA The Victim The Adversary The Rescuer

17. The Rescuer • Lets things to go haywire • So they can come in and fix • Do not trust others • Don’t believe in others’ strengths • “if I want something done right…” • Sweep in at last minute • May even hijack credit

18. Victim Behavior • Drains energy with their indirect way of dealing with issues and people • Avoid conflict • Whine and complain – in the background • Blame others • “Management is not setting a good example” • Excuses are their default communication • Passive aggressive behavior • Do not express verbally what is affecting them but do it through behavior

19. The Adversary • Top dog • Bully, coerce, pressure • Won’t let up till have their way • Dominate and control • Often center stage, entertaining • Sarcasm is a key tool • At all costs, blame others • Easily points out flaws

20. The Leadership Triangle Visionary Catalyst Coach

21. Visionary • Can develop and communicate a vision of the future in such that members of the team are charged with positive emotion and imagination • Sees real possibilities in tough situations • Speaks the future into existence • Has a compelling direction

22. Catalyst • Initiates or accelerates a reaction. Communicates in a way that causes an important event to happen, like a leader who acts as a catalyst to unite the team. • Gets things moving – instill a sense of urgency • Passionate and not afraid to act • Inspires innovation & purposeful action • Gets individuals and organizations to change

23. Coach • Sees the strengths in others and operates in a way to bring out their best. • Believes in people - commits to their success • Develops others and celebrate their growth • Role model for giving and receiving feedback • Delivers tough messages in a constructive and supportive way Can coaching behavior apply if George is your Peer? Supervisor?

24. Food for thought DRAMA • What triggers you to operate in this triangle? • Have you benefitted from being there? • Do you prefer to work with colleagues who operate this way? Write down the name of someone…. Boss Peer Employee LEADERSHIP • What triggers you to operate in this triangle? • Have you benefitted from being there? • Do you prefer to work with colleagues who operate this way? Write down the name of someone…. Boss Peer Employee

25. One of these sounds less stressful, so how do I make it work? • Sometimes the wall needs to be a mirror • Think about how you are responding • Who is the leader you want to be? • Manage your state of mind before you communicate

26. What will it take to keep you out of the drama triangle and up here? Visionary I know he is really trying to do the right thing. His behavior is not professional, but…. The assumption of Positive intent Catalyst Coach I won’t go into that lower triangle…

27. The role of communication • Quality communication is an essential ingredient to high quality and effective leadership. • It is possible only when working in the blue zone • Or moving others toward it Leadership Drama

28. Quality communication is deliberate • Straight talk • Go to whom have issue with • No substitutes • Period • Frame your issue/statement • State your positive intentions more than once • Rule of 7 • Listen and assume the other person’s positive intent • Acknowledge & Verify • Be authentic and specific • How you feel on a personal level • Verify that message is understood

29. Quality communication is personal • Assume positive intent of the other party and demonstrate it yourself. • Speak in 1st person • what happened and how you interpreted it • Seek to understand • Ask what was going on for them • Clean up • Apologize if you were wrong or caused harm, even if only bruised feelings • Agree to correct – and expect being on probation

30. What gets results is interpersonal • Be fully present in any conversation, especially the hard ones • The little ones matter • In the cafeteria • In the hall • In the parking lot • Telling the truth • A two-way conversation Basics build trust

31. Finally – don’t miss the body • Read body language ADDRESS IT • Eyes and hands • Say things the voice can’t • Watch triggers of emotions • Cues and comments • You seem nervous… • I know this is uncomfortable… • Have you already decided what needs to happen? • Use your own body language

32. Case Study – how would your react? • Sally is charged with writing a policy document that affects multiple offices in the organization. She receives many comments, with one that is especially negative. She doesn’t agree. She submits the paper forward without addressing the concern with the person or office who submitted it. • The negative comment is yours. What are you thinking? What would you do • Sally is your boss • Sally is your peer • You are Sally’s boss

33. But wait! George or Sally? Does it make a difference?

34. Summary • Self-awareness is essential to good interpersonal skills • What is your wall? • Your filter? • Your tendency? • How being a woman affects your communication and style with women and men • Assuming positive intention is a choice • Facilitates quality communication • Essential feature of strong leadership • Go negative at your peril • Use tools to assure good conversations • Assume positive intent • Listen – conversations are two way • Nonjudgmental straight talk

35. Know thyself & where your world view comes from.