Domestic Violence Curriculum Delta VOICES: V ision o f I nspiring C hange & E mpowering S uccess

1. Domestic Violence Curriculum Delta VOICES: Vision of Inspiring Change & Empowering Success South Atlantic Region Leadership Fellows Class 2014 Project

2. I’VE BEEN BULLIED! Have You?

3. Pre Evaluation Questions 1. How would you define violence? 2. Have you or someone you know personally been affected by violence? 3. If so, how did you cope with it? Did you report the ordeal to local officials or your school administrators? 4. Do you think violence against a Woman is a crime? 5. Who should be involved once violence has been detected against someone?

4. Pre Evaluation Questions 6. Why do you think bullying exist in today’s society? 7. What age would do you think bullying occurs in the school? 8. What are the warning signs of someone being bullied? 9. Have you ever attempted to bully someone? 10. Why do some student’s feel the need to become bullies?

5. COURSE OVERVIEW • Objectives • Domestic Violence • Bullying • Dating Violence • Conclusion

6. objectives • Economic Development - Assist victims of domestic violence in breaking the cycle and becoming self-sufficient. • Educational Development - Address the effects of bullying on educational excellence and identify effective remedies • International Awareness and Involvement – all ethnic communities both nationally and international enhance awareness. • Physical and Mental Health - Highlight the effects of domestic violence on victim’s health and the associated cost to society • Political Awareness and Involvement- Advocate for additional legislation to protect the victims

7. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Myths • Domestic violence… • is rare, affecting a small percentage of the population; • occurs only in poor, uneducated, minority families; • is usually a one time, isolated occurrence. • The real problem is couples who assault each other. Women are just as violent as men. • Alcohol abuse causes domestic violence.

8. MYTHS Continued… • Men who batter are often good fathers and should have joint custody of their children if the couple separates • All members of the family are participating in the dynamic, and all must change for the violence to stop. • Battered women are masochistic and provoke the abuse. They must like it or they would leave. • Men have a right to discipline their partners for misbehaving. Battering is NOT a crime.

9. Domestic violence • … is defined by S. C. Code of Laws Ann §16-25-20 as • … behavior used to establish power and control though fear, intimidation, isolation, etc. • …offering or attempting to cause physical harm or injury to a person’s own household member • …reasonably creating fear of imminent peril

10. NATIONAL Statistical Perspectives… • 1 out of 4 women will experience domestic violence • 1.3 million women are victims of physical aggression/assault by an intimate partner each year • 1/3 female homicide victims reported to police are killed by their intimate partner • Domestic violence is a factor in nearly 50% of homeless women and children

11. More Statistical Perspectives… • More that 4 million physical assaults/rapes because of their partners • 30% women killed by intimate partner • Women between ages 20 to 24 greater are at risk • More than 3 million children witness domestic violence in their homes • Between 6 pm and 6 am for female/male victims • 60% occur at the home located in rural areas

12. Domestic Violence in SC • 1.94 per 100,000 women killed by men • Women are primarily killed by guns • 7th in Nation for women murdered by their intimate partners • Consistent pattern of top ten in the nation

13. What are Your community’s statistics…

14. Characteristics of an abuser • Self-centeredness & selfishness • Air of superiority & sense of entitlement • Possessiveness & controlling • Manipulative & serial battering • Contradictory statements & behaviors • Denial, minimization, & victim blaming • Externalization of responsibility

15. Types of domestic violence • Physical - Slapping, kicking, hitting, shoving, isolating, etc. • Sexual – Foundling, sexting, rape, forced prostitution, etc. • Emotional - Constant criticism, name-calling, humiliation, shouting, harming victim’s relationship with family, etc. • Psychological – Threats, isolation, mind games, stalking, destruction of victims’ property, etc. • Economic - Controlling finances, withholding funds, damaging victim’s credit, interfering with school or work …

17. Cycle of violence Abuse Guilt

18. women who stay are… The Safety Seeker The Blind The Worthless The Defective The Manager The Gullible The Defender The Caretaker The Fantasizer The Martyr The Helpless The Hopeless • The Pretender http://www.prevent-abuse-now.com/domviol.htm

19. Safety plan • Identifying support - Friends, family, church, counselors, shelters, etc. • Legal Options - Criminal charges, restraining/protective orders • Plan for Safety - Memorize emergency numbers & gather emergency supplies • Tell others you trust & talk to your children • Identify escape routes & places to go

20. Trust your instincts

21. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE facts • A women is beaten every 15 second - 3 to 4 million beaten annually • 85% of the victims of spouse abuse are females • Wife abusers also abuse their children in 70% of cases • Battering is a pattern of coercion & control • Although there is a high correlation between substance abuse and battering, it is not a causal relationship.

22. Facts continued… • Batterers must be willing to change • Victim provocation is not common • Abuse occurs regardless of income, profession, region, ethnicity, educational level, or race • Women are not property of men and battering is a crime

23. bullying

24. Bullying is… a repeated aggressive behavior that is intentional cruelty that no one should go through. Everything that can be done, should be done to stop it at the earliest opportunity.

25. 13 Million Kids are Bullied Every Year • 1 child is bullied every 7 minutes • 20% of 9-12th graders nationwide are bullied • 160,000 bullied students miss school daily • 1 of 4 child reports being cyber bullying more than occasionally • Bullying - a leading factor in suicide among 11-16 years old • Identified as a factor in 2/3 of the 37 school shootings reviewed by the US Secret Service

26. Types of bullying • Individual bullying is one-on-one, in person or on line; more prevalent in elementary schools. • Pack bullying is by a group; more prominent in high school. • Physical bullying is abuse pushing, shoving, hitting, etc. • Emotional bullying involves ostracizing, ignoring, insults, derogatory remarks, name calling, and teasing.

27. BULLYING in Primary school • …is a painful and sensitive issue • Name calling is the most common form of bullying • Physical violence is the second most common form for boys • Exclusion is the second most common for girls • Victims experience frustration, humiliation, isolation, and fear as well as decreased self confidence and self esteem (Englander, 2011)

28. Bullying in Middle school The National Center for Education Statistics reported : • More bullying in grades 6, 7, and 8 than in senior high school • Emotional bullying is the most prevalent type of bullying • Physical bullying is second; least prominent is cyber bullying • Middle school students are most likely to be bullied on the bus • Middle school students are more likely to be injured • The percentage injured decreases every grade from 6 to 12 (Bullying Statistics - Stop Bullying, Harassment, and Violence, 2009)

29. Bullying in High School Bullying … directly affects students’ ability to learn; not a “rite of passage” but a serious threat to student safety and well-being; not exclusive to older students, male students, or popular students; Bystanders can be powerful allies. Effective bullying prevention efforts involve students, parents, teachers, and community members

30. What Can TEACHERS and SCHOOL ADMINISTRATORS Do??? • Be knowledgeable and observant • Involve students and parents • Set positive expectations about behavior for students and adults (American Psychological Association)

31. What Can PARENTS Do? • Observe your child for signs they might be being bullied • Teach your child how to handle being bullied • Set boundaries with technology • Stop bullying before it starts • Make your home “bully free” • Look for self-esteem issues (American Psychological Association)

32. What Can STUDENTS Do? • Report bullying and cyber bullying • Don’t bully back • Avoid being alone (American Psychological Association)

33. Dating Violence FROM TO

34. DATING VIOLENCE STATISTICS • Nearly 1.5 million high school students experience physical abuse from a dating partner every year. • 1 in 10 high school students has been purposefully hit, slapped, or hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend. • Girls & Young Women between the ages of 16 & 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence. • 4.8 million women and 2.9 million men are victims of intimate partner violence. • Nearly 1 in 5 girls reported being threatened when trying to break up • 30% of teens in a violent relationship are killed by their partner. • Each year 1,500 people die from intimate partner violence

35. Early warning signs your date may eventually become abusive • Quick involvement • Extreme jealousy, controlling behavior • Unpredictable mood swings • Verbally abusive • Explosive anger • Threatens violence, uses force during an argument • Alcohol and drug use

36. More warning signs your date may eventually become abusive • Believes in rigid sex roles • Isolates you from friends and family • Shows hypersensitivity • Blames others for his problems or feelings • Cruel to animals or children • Abused former partners

37. Signs a teenager may be experiencing dating violence: • Emotional outburst • Physical signs of injury • Failing grades, truancy, dropping out of school • Changes in mood or personality • Use of drugs/alcohol • Pregnancy • Isolation

38. Conclusion • Bullying increases the likelihood of poor grades, substance abuse, and/or suicide • There is a link between violence in the home and bullying a • Bullying and domestic violence are cyclical Per CDC researchers, “A comprehensive approach that encompasses school officials, students and their families is needed to prevent bullying among middle school and high school students."

39. Post Evaluation Questions 1. Name two important facts as to how a woman can be protected against violence? 2. Is a woman’s confidence/ self-esteem level a direct correlation to whether or not she allows herself to be subjected to violence? 3. What school programs or local seminars can be implemented to raise awareness to school bullying and violence against women?

40. Post Evaluation Questions 4. What can schools do to stop bullying? 5. Is social media a part of the problem or the solution when it comes to bullying? 6. Would you recommend this presentation be given to a - Women only b -Men and Women c - Children d - All of the above 7. How often do you think Bullying occurs in the school? When and where?

41. Post Evaluation Questions 8. How often should this presentation be given in your community? a - Once a year b -Twice a year C.-Three time a year 9. Who would benefit most from this presentation: the victims or the abusers? 10. Would you recommend this presentation be given to other groups in your community? Yes or No

42. References • American Psychological Association (2013). Bullying: How parents, teachers, and kids, can take action to prevent bullying. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/bullying.aspx?item=4 • bullyingstatistics.org (2009). Bullying statistics - stop bullying, harassment, and violence. Retrieved from http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/content/school-bullying.html • Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2011). Bullying among middle school and high school students --- Massachusetts, 2009. Retrieved from http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/mm6015a1.htm

43. REFERENCES • dosomething.org (n.d.). 11 Facts about bullying. Retrieved from http://www.dosomething.org/tipsandtools/11-facts-about-school- bullying • Englander, E. (2011). Research findings: MARC 2011 survey grades 3-12. Retrieved from http://webhost.bridgew.edu/marc/MARC%20REPORT- Bullying%20In%20Grades%203-12%20in%20MA.pdf • Pacer’s National Bullying Prevention Center (2012). Bullying: fast facts. Retrieved from http://www.pacer.org/bullying/about/media- kit/facts.asp

44. References • South Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault (2013). South Carolina ranks #1 in the nation for women killed by men. Retrieved from http://sccadvasa.tumblr.com/post/62242239905/south-carolina-ranks-1-in-the-nation-for-women-killed • State of South Carolina (2012). SC Code of Laws. Retrieved from http://www.scstatehouse.gov/code/t59c063.ph • The Book Bank Foundation (2012). Nationwide bullying statistics. Retrieved from http://www.thebbf.org/nationwide-bullying- statistics