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What are the Worst Consequences You have Ever Received?.
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What are the Worst Consequences You have Ever Received? What consequences have I received in the first place…I’m not sure. I have only one thing in mind right now, my lack of a Christmas gift this year. I know I shouldn’t care, but I do. Since I haven’t been using my massages, my husband says he won’t be getting me a gift and that makes me sad. I guess it’s fair, but I’m bummed out. Oh! I thought of some real consequences. I have, unfortunately had several car accidents and those have had some real consequences. The biggest one would have to have been when my car got totaled. I took a left turn and got T-boned. It was rated as my fault and I am just so grateful that no one except me got hurt. That accident really changed my life. It was months before I felt comfortable making a left turn and I avoided them like the plague. I also almost ruined my eye surgery because the airbag deployed. It also happened before I moved out and just further convinced us that I needed to move out to O’Fallon and that I needed more sleep. What if my son had been in the car? The passenger side door was right next to my right leg by the time the accident was finished. I had to take care of getting my insurance and car totaled out, something I had never done before, and I had to go to the hospital by myself while a police officer grilled me and later ticketed me. It was awful. Then I ended up having to go before a judge, having to get a lawyer. It was terrible. I still remember the awful feeling as I stood in that courtroom.
Loop #1 What if my son had been in the car? These words still worry me. Every time I make a left turn, or am about to, I think about my son in the front seat and my daughter behind him in the back. I am one of the biggest hesitators when it comes to driving. My dad always had a catchy sentence for that when I was learning to drive, “He who hesitates, waits.” I loved that idea. It really seemed like a good one. Sometimes I know people get frustrated with me because I hesitate a lot, but I just figure it is okay if I’m late somewhere as long as I get there. Who knows, if I didn’t wait, someone could be hurt. I really learned from that car wreck. Unfortunately, it didn’t keep me from having other wrecks. I am a horrible driver. I have gotten better, but everyone knows me as a horrible driver. I have had at least six different accidents that I can remember. I have gotten well over five traffic tickets, and I am not allowed to be the driver most times when any of us want to go out. It’s nice being chauffeured around, but it is upsetting to know that no one really trusts me.
Loop #2 it is okay if I’m late somewhere…I am late all the time! It is okay with me most of the time except when there are consequences. For example, it really bothers me when I am late to Church or work. I know those are places where I have to get to on time. I have been so concerned with being late to work this year that I am leaving my house about twenty to forty minutes earlier than I did last year! One day I got here at 7:25 and I felt so late! I was freaking out and called Mrs. Simms to see if she could unlock my room and turn on my lights. I cruised into the school and up the stairs right as she was walking down to my room to open it. She said, “you’re not that late, you can calm down.” But most of the time, I don’t mind too much. My mom and my sister joke that they have to tell me a time of arrival like an hour earlier just so I’ll get there close to on time. It’s kind of true…I’m a slowpoke. I wasn’t always this bad, but I think I’ve gotten worse because people expect it of me and it’s easy to meet people’s expectations when they’re low.
Loop #3 late to work…I was so late to work last year I made it an art form. My friends would hook me up by unlocking my door every day so it wasn’t so obvious. I would fly into the door, hiding my head and cutting through the less-traveled spots at 7:38, managing to sign on to my computer and email and get the projector loaded right as the announcements came on. It was tricky, but it worked. I guess it was laziness, or I was really tired, I don’t have a good excuse for why I was so late last year. I am just surprised that no one really called me on it. I still think it was wrong that I was so careless. I know that I was still a good teacher, but I could have been more calm and prepared if I had shown up on time. There is a reason they like teachers to be early! Anyway, I’m working hard to make sure I don’t start that pattern again. The latest I’ve been all year is 7:25, and I don’t plan on doing that again. I like getting here between 7:00 and 7:15. It’s so calm here then and I feel like I just get a few key things organized.