Effective Writing Practices

1. Effective Writing Practices • Practical skills to own, whenever you write. • Kevin Raczynski • kraczyns@uga.edu

2. Session Objectives1) Explore what is meant by “Going GREEN”2) Explore how Going GREEN impacts other aspects of writing

3. Weighting of Domain ScoresWeighting means that the scores in some writing domains will be given more weight than others in determining the total score that a student receives.

4. Zeroing in: IDEAS

5. The Key Elements of the IDEAS domain Controlling Idea (Focus) Relevant Supporting Ideas General Details Specific Details And Elaboration

6. Grade 3 Writing Situation This unit, we have been studying rocks and minerals native to Georgia.Examples include Quartz and Kaolin. Directions for Writing Pick one rock or mineral we have been studying. In one paragraph, describe its physical characteristics. General Topic Context for the Topic Writer’s task

7. Quartz Physical characteristics: 1) Color 2) Hardness

8. Ideas: Emerging • Hi my name is JR. I will like to tell you about quartz. They look they feel soft and some are kind of rough.

9. Ideas: Focusing • Quartz has many interesting physical features.It is one of the hardest minerals. It comes in many colors, like purple, grey and white.

10. Ideas: Extending • The physical characteristics of quartz are awesome. You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink. Purple quartz is called amethyst.It is one of the hardest minerals. It is so hard it can scratch other minerals.It’s a number 7 on the Moh’s hardness scale so it can scratch one through six.

11. Grade 3 Writing Situation This unit, we have been studying rocks and minerals native to Georgia.Examples include Quartz and Kaolin. Directions for Writing Pick one rock or mineral we have been studying. Write a report describing its: a) physical characteristics b) uses c) location General Topic Context for the Topic Writer’s task

12. Quartz Uses Physical characteristics Conclusion

13. These elements illustrated (Grade 3)) Quartz is a really interesting mineral found in GA. Controlling Idea: Supporting Idea General Detail Specific Details and Elaboration • Sample Body Paragraph • The color, shape, size and location of quartz can be different.You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink. Purple quartz is called amethyst.Quartz is found worldwide.You can find quartz at the beach. Yep, that’s right, quartz is in sand.

14. Ideas Score: Does Not Meet • Hi my name is JR. I will like to tell you about quartz. They look they feel soft and some are kind of rough. The loctain in Goirgean other place. They uses for window glass wactchs.

15. Ideas Score: Meets • I think quartz is a very interesting mineral for several reasons • Quartz has many interesting physical features.It is one of the hardest minerals. It comes in many colors. • Did you know that quartz can be found in rocks all over the world? It’s the most common minerals and is found all over the world. • Quartz has many uses. One thing I did not know is that quartz it is used to make windows, paint, glass, lens, for eyeglasses and even clocks. • So, I think you should go study quartz.

16. Ideas Score: Exceeds • Imagine you are climbing Georgia’s mountains. You find a big rock. Then you hit it with a hammer. Ta da! Something shiny and sparkly is in it. That is a quartz.It is one of the hardest minerals. It is so hard it can scratch other minerals.It’s a number 7 on the Moh’s hardness scale so it can scratch one through six. • The color, shape, size and location of quartz can be different. You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink. Purple quartz is called amethyst.Quartz is found worldwide.You can find quartz at the beach. Yep, that’s right, quartz is in sand. • Quartz changes by weathering. It doesn’t break down easy though. Unlike many minerals it doesn’t expand when it is heated or crack when it is cooled.Quartz is also used in many ways.One thing I did not know is that quartz it is used to make windows, glass, lenses for eyeglasses and even clocks. • Now that I know so much about quartz I feel like a geologist.

17. IDEAS feedback/exercise # 1: GEN/SPEC Quartz has many interesting physical features.It is one of the hardest minerals. It comes in many colors. • General Details • It is one of the hardest minerals. • It comes in many colors. • Specific Details • It’s a number 7 on the Moh’s hardness scale. • You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink.

18. Grade 4 Narrative Writing Situation All of us have things that make our life difficult at times. Directions for Writing Write a personal narrative explaining why you feel it’s hard being you (at your age: 9 or 10) General Topic Context for the Topic Writer’s task

19. Why it is hard being nine Homework is hard. >>details I have lots of chores. >>details Conclusion

20. These elements, illustrated: Sample Body Paragraph First of all, is responsibilities. I have one pet that is a cat. I need to sometimes scoop up the nasty poop and pee. The good thing is I get to play with my cat. Then, I have to sometimes clean my dirty room when I don’t want to. Also, I have to be a big sister. I have to teach her and help her. Controlling Idea: It is really hard being nine. Supporting Idea Major Details Specific details and elaboration

21. Ideas: Score Point 1 Do you think It is hard to Be 10. Well I do Because I hate taking out the trashand It stinks. If the sink is full I don’t like doing thatBecause the water is cold. I absolutely hate doing homeworkBecause It is super hard. I say It is hard Being 10.

22. Ideas: Score Point 3 Hi, I am 9 years old. Have you ever had anything difficult in your life? While your thinking here’s some difficult things in my life. First of all, is responsibilities. I have one pet that is a cat. I need to sometimes scoop up the nasty poop and pee. The good thing is I get to play with my cat. Then, I have to sometimes clean my dirty room when I don’t want to. Also, I have to be a big sister. I have to teach her and help her. Next is school. In school I have to learn a lot of things and some things I’m not good at. Then, I have to do homeworkand make sure I turn it in on time. Then, I have sports. In sports I have to practice a lot and sometimes it takes away some of my playtime. Also, I have a lot of games and sometimes it gets boring, but I love it. Last but not least is my family. My sister and cousins can sometimes be bossy. Oh, and we fight a lot but not much. Also, we sometimes be mean to each other too. Now you know what is difficult in my life. Have you thought of yours yet.

23. Ideas: Score Point 4+ Do you think it’s hard being your age? It’s even harder being 9. Here is why. I’m usually too short to ride the roller coasters I want to ride. A lot of my friends are taller than me so they can ride them and when they come down they talk about how much fun they had. In addition I have to take care of my dog. I have to take the dog on walks, feed her, give her a bath, and play with her. It’s hard doing that by yourself. Also it’s hard having younger siblings. They can drive you crazy! They always expect me to take care of them. I don’t understand why. Here is another reason: There is so much homework! Between coming home and going to bed, I don’t have time to do it all. It’s hard to play softball for fast-pitch. The ball comes way faster than when you’re playing coach pitch. The girls also throw faster and are really good at pitching. Next you have to wait to grow up. I would love to be driving right now. That would be awesome, but I can’t reach the pedals so I’ll have to wait. Also my parents embarrass me sometimes. Like when they ask “Do you need to go to the bathroom?” when they just asked that 5 minutes ago. That drives me insane. Even though it’s hard being nine I’m glad I have all that I have. I have a great family, a great home, and more. Being 9 has its hard times but in the end I’m glad I’m still 9.

24. IDEAS feedback/exercise # 1: GEN/SPEC Next is school. In school I have to learn a lot of things and some things I’m not good at. Then, I have to do homeworkand make sure I turn it in on time. • General Details • In school I have to learn a lot of things and some things I’m not good at. • Then, I have to do homeworkand make sure I turn it in on time. • Specific Details • Lately, I’ve had to learn how to multiply fractions, which is really hard. • I usually have two hours of homework each night. I have to have it done by the next day.

25. IDEAS feedback/exercise # 2: ELABORATE Lately, I’ve had to learn how to multiply fractions, which is really hard.  Great example. Add 1 more sentence explaining how you feel when you are asked to multiply fractions. It makes me feel so confused all I want to do is put my head on my desk.

26. 2011 Grade 5 Persuasive Writing Situation Your principal is asking your class for ideas to improve the school. What change would you make to improve your school? Directions for Writing Write a letter to convince your principal to make your change. General Topic and context Writer’s task

27. We need to make some lunch changes Cleaner lunchroom >>details More drink options >>details Conclusion

28. These elements, illustrated: If you make these changes, our school will be so much better. (response to 2011 Persuasive topic) Controlling Idea: Sample Body Paragraph Something needs to be done about our drink options at lunch. Right now, we have very few options. There is milk, chocolate milk, and orange juice. I think we should add drinks like Gatorade, Smart Water, and Fuze. These are healthy drinks that are a lot more exciting than the ones we have now. And who doesn’t want more excitement during the school day? Supporting Idea Major Details Specific details and elaboration

29. Ideas: Score Point 1 One day our teacher made us watch a elmo video when suddenly the door opened. It was Mrs. H. aka the principal. Mrs. A. paused the video and turned around without moving her feet. Then Mrs. H. came in front of us and told us that are going to improve the school. She told us if anyone has an idea write a letter an give it to your teacher. Then our teacher turned the video back on. Meanwhile I was talking to Jake, “Jake now’s my chance.” After schoo, I wrote a letter. Dear Mrs. H., I have a few ideas, so here’s a list. 1-3. 1. We would like to have a buffet line or a food court. 2. We would like to have longer recesses. 3. We would like to have shorter school hours too. Sincerely, G.H.

30. Ideas: Score Point 2 We would love a clean school! Are school needs to be the cleanest school on earth! I would enjoy a clean school, with nice students. If we have a nice school it would be the best school in the world. A nice, clean, and beautiful school is the best school of all. We need a clean lavatory. It really stinks in there now. It is also really dirty. It would be great to get it all cleaned up. Recess and other fun things would be great. It would be fun to move around. I think we should have a nice long recess. It would be fun to sit in the grass.

31. Ideas: Score Point 3 This paper you are about to read shows the improvements I think are fair. I hope you agree with these suggestions. I also do believe they are reasonable for the school. First off I think morning work should be put to an end. It would give us more time to get ready for the day. I think it would prepare us to be organized. The second thing is the washing of tables. It would be more healthy if the school used hot water with five drops of soap. The table washers would wear gloves, so the things they touch won’t get on the table. So, in conclusion the table would be bacteria free, and students would not get sick a lot! Third, I think it would be more fun if we all get into all the holiday spirits with arts and crafts. Then it would give even more ideal time for young artists. It would also give older students a chance to have more fun with art. I hope these are good enough to improve the school. I hope you also agree with my choices. Goodbye to you.

32. Ideas: Score Point 4 I am writing this letter to tell you my opinion on how to improve the school. I hope it will come in use. My opinion is for the school to have cameras installed. This way you can see who has done something against school rules. I think that this way would be easier than trying to have someone confess and keep taking priveleges away from innocent children. The place I think is the worst is the bathrooms. In our fifth grade bathrooms, boy’s mostly, people do not behave too well. Sometimes they do something so bad that the whole fifth grade can’t use the bathroom! This is why the bathrooms should be installed with cameras. The next place is the lunchroom. I am a quiet person who does not talk much so I usually just listen and spetate. Kids at the lunch table do bad things. They do stuff behind lunch ladies’ backs and make fun of the picture on the wall. Sometimes they play with their food. All the time I can hear them shout loudly, even when the lights are off! That is why I say, if not the bathrooms, put cameras in the lunchroom to catch those kids. The last place I think kids act bad is the classrooms. They sure do shout and argue with each other! Another way is when they put their hands on someone. I get board of having to listen to lectures of behaving good when I already do! This is why my opinion of helping the school is to put cameras in the school.

33. Ideas: Score Point 5 I am having problems with the stoplight in the cafeteria. I think it is not such a good idea to have it. Of the few times in the school day we have to talk to our friends, lunch is one of them. Actually, lunch is the best time to talk freely. But the stoplight won’t let us. Yes, I know sometimes we make too much noise, but the problem is, it’s on red too much. We don’t make that much noise do we? Honestly, I have only seen the stoplight on green three times this year. The stoplight is also the reason a lot students talk in class. They probably feel that since they barely talk in the lunchroom, that they should replace that time with learning time. I’m not the only one who feels this way. The whole fifth grade thinks this also. Some of the fourth graders are even making petitions. I know that you’re a busy person so I came up with my own ideas to help the situation. First of all, what about getting rid of the stoplight? Go back to the way you used to handle noise. Whenever it got too noisy, the cafeteria monitors would turn the lights off. Some people can’t see what color the stoplight is on so they keep talking. But everyone can see if the lights on the ceiling are off. Another solution I thought of is just reprogramming the stoplight to go on green more often. If you don’t have any technicians, or if it’s too expensive to hire one, I can do it. I’m a tech expert. All I need are the tools and permission from you. I’m clean out of ideas for now. Thank you for taking your time to read this letter.

34. IDEAS feedback/exercise # 1: GEN/SPEC First off I think morning work should be put to an end. It would give us more time to get ready for the day. I think it would prepare us to be organized. • General Details • I would give us more time to get ready for the day. • I think it would prepare us to be organized. • Specific Details • It would give us more time to study for tests and to finish any homework we forgot about. • We could take the time to organize our desks so we will be ready for the day.

35. IDEAS feedback/exercise # 2: ELABORATE First off I think morning work should be put to an end.I think it would prepare us to be organized. We could take the time to organize our desks so we will be ready for the day.  Great work so far. Now, add one more sentence explaining how being ready for the day will help you. When we are ready for the day, we won’t waste time looking for books or papers. We can get more learning done.

36. Zeroing in: Organization • Better sequencing through Going GREEN

37. Drafting Planning/ Prewriting Revising & Editing Proofread/ Publish Final Draft Success through… …the Writing Process

38. The Big Picture: How do I get there? What is my position (in persuasive writing)? What am I explaining (in informational writing)? What are my supporting ideas (main points)?

39. 2011 Grade 5 Persuasive Writing Situation Your principal is asking your class for ideas to improve the school. What change would you make to improve your school? Directions for Writing Write a letter to convince your principal to make your change. General Topic and context Writer’s task

40. Planning / Prewriting Clean the bathroomsHave ice cream everydayGet rid of the stoplight in the cafeteria Kids need to talk at times.  Add details in your draft. • Kids need to talk at times • It is expensive to operate. • It is ugly. • Go back to the old system. Go back to the old system.  Add details in your draft.

41. Connecting parts of the BIG Picture • Grouping: occurs when the writer uses relevant details to elaborate particular supporting ideas. • The next place is the lunchroom. I am a quiet person who does not talk much so I usually just listen and spetate. Kids at the lunch table do bad things. They do stuff behind lunch ladies’ backs and make fun of the picture on the wall. Sometimes they play with their food. All the time I can hear them shout loudly, even when the lights are off! That is why I say, if not the bathrooms, put cameras in the lunchroom to catch those kids.

42. Sequencing: Order Matters Quartz has many interesting physical features.It is one of the hardest minerals.  Good! What is its hardness on Mohs Scale of Hardness? It’s a number 7 on Mohs hardness scale. It comes in many colors.  Yes, that’s true. Now, add one more sentence about the specific colors it comes in. You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink.

43. Sequencing: Order Matters Putting it all together… Quartz has many interesting physical features.It is one of the hardest minerals.  It’s a number 7 on Mohs hardness scale.It comes in many colors.  You can find quartz in grey, white, purple, brown and pink.

44. Sequencing: Order Matters Next is school. In school I have to learn a lot of things and some things I’m not good at.  Good. Give an example of one thing you learn in school. Lately, I’ve had to learn how to multiply fractions, which is really hard.  Great work so far. Now, add one more sentence explaining how you feel when you are asked to multiply fractions. It makes me feel so confused all I want to do is put my head on my desk.

45. Sequencing: Order Matters Putting it all together… Next is school. In school I have to learn a lot of things and some things I’m not good at.  Lately, I’ve had to learn how to multiply fractions, which is really hard. It makes me feel so confused all I want to do is put my head on my desk.

46. Sequencing: Order Matters First off I think morning work should be put to an end.I think it would prepare us to be organized.  What would you organize? We could take the time to organize our desks so we will be ready for the day.  Great work so far. Now, add one more sentence explaining how being ready for the day will help you. When we are ready for the day, we won’t waste time looking for books or papers. We can get more learning done.

47. Sequencing: Order Matters Putting it all together… First off I think morning work should be put to an end.I think it would prepare us to be organized. We could take the time to organize our desks so we will be ready for the day.  When we are ready for the day, we won’t waste time looking for books or papers. We can get more learning done.

48. More Effective Transitions However For example Therefore Connecting parts of the BIG Picture

49. However When you want to show contrast between ideas Many people think kids won’t drink milk. If you get chocolate milk, however, they will take it down in big huge gulps!

50. For example When you want to set up a SPECIFIC example I think it would prepare us to be organized. For example,we could take the time to organize our desks so we will be ready for the day.