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Slides presented by Keith Rasmussen At the MMCC Parenting Workshop ‘07 Mar 1: teens Mar 2: kids 6-12 Mar 3: kids 0-5

Slides presented by Keith Rasmussen At the MMCC Parenting Workshop ‘07 Mar 1: teens Mar 2: kids 6-12 Mar 3: kids 0-5. "Take to heart all the words I have solemnly declared to you this day, so that you may

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Slides presented by Keith Rasmussen At the MMCC Parenting Workshop ‘07 Mar 1: teens Mar 2: kids 6-12 Mar 3: kids 0-5

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  1. Slides presented by Keith Rasmussen At the MMCC Parenting Workshop ‘07 Mar 1: teens Mar 2: kids 6-12 Mar 3: kids 0-5

  2. "Take to heart all the words I have solemnly declared to you this day, so that you may command your children to obey carefully all the words of this law. They are not just idle words for you — they are your life.” Deut 32:46-47

  3. Teens The Roller Coaster Years

  4. My Credentials

  5. The Roller Coaster Ride 12-13 From child to confusion

  6. The Roller Coaster Ride 13-14 Sudden awareness of how weird they are. Discovery of how weird you are. Hormones rampage

  7. The Roller Coaster Ride 14-15 Sex arrives full blown on the scene. Guys undergo rapid loss of brain, moral and emotional control when girl smiles at them. Girls lose all intelligent thought.

  8. The Roller Coaster Ride 15-16 Suddenly determine that they are all grown up and mature And That you are not

  9. The Roller Coaster Ride 16-17 detach from family except for funds.

  10. The Roller Coaster Ride 17-18 write home once in a while for more funds, begin to think they may have to work for funds someday

  11. The Roller Coaster Ride 18-19 Find out their dream boy/girl friend is really not cool. Begin to consider that they may not know everything

  12. The Roller Coaster Ride 19-20 Character begins to show up many of your worst faults suddenly appear in them.

  13. The Roller Coaster Ride • 20-21 you discover the person your child has become.

  14. Proactive Parenting Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in it’s own way • Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

  15. Proactive Parenting Be available

  16. Proactive Parenting Be available Listen when THEY want to talk

  17. Proactive Parenting Be available Listen when THEY want to talk Ask the tough questions

  18. Proactive Parenting Be available Listen when THEY want to talk Ask the tough questions Lead them to maturity

  19. Presenting the Father These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. • Deut 6:6-9

  20. Presenting the Father In the face of your teens storms Show the steadfastness of the Father By calm but firm and steadfast adherence to God’s standards

  21. Principle #1Example Be who you want your children to Become • They are watching you.

  22. Principle #2Obedience He did what was right in the eyes of the LORD, just as his father Amaziah had done. 2 Chron 26:4-5

  23. ObediencePracticals Never discipline in anger

  24. Obedience I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my work, and this was the reward for all my labor. Eccl 2:10-14 [what teens imagine life after moving out will be like]

  25. Obedience 12 Then I turned my thoughts to consider wisdom, and also madness and folly. Eccl 2:10-14

  26. Obedience 13 I saw that wisdom is better than folly, just as light is better than darkness. 14 The wise man has eyes in his head, while the fool walks in the darkness; Eccl 2:10-14

  27. Obedience Wisdom or Folly Creating the dividing line

  28. ObediencePracticals Let your punishments be relevant and practical remove privileges add chores ground

  29. Principle # 3Guardianship • And fathers, don't stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. • Eph 6:4 • Holman

  30. Guardianship • VERY difficult balance • You must be very wise in your choices of “yes” and “no” • Explain why • Be firm when you are right, be willing to retreat when you are wrong.

  31. Guardianship • Do not just tell them what they can’t do. • Create things they can do. • Teen ministry activities • You must get involved • Spend time and money on them

  32. Guardianship • If your teen thinks you are being a jerk • Two possibilities: • You are being a jerk • They want to get away with something Be open and consider which one.

  33. Guardianship • This is the time when teens look closely at your life and judge you. • Sometimes they are right • Listen carefully, respond and change

  34. Guardianship • This is the time when teens look closely at your life and judge you. • Sometimes they are right • Listen carefully, respond and change • Sometimes they are wrong Listen carefully, get advice then prove them wrong.

  35. Principle #4Humility Wrong Assumptions Losing Temper Discipline when teen not at fault • Apologize • Ask for forgiveness

  36. Humility The Perfect Parent is not a good thing

  37. Humility The Perfect Parent is not a good thing How can you teach mercy, forgiveness, and repentance except by example?

  38. Humility The Perfect Parent is not a good thing Showing error and weakness does not destroy trust.

  39. Humility The Perfect Parent is not a good thing Showing error and weakness and not admitting it, does destroy trust.

  40. Humility The Perfect Parent is not a good thing What more can the king's successor do than what has already been done? Eccl 2:10-14

  41. PracticalsExample • Integrity • Do you push for discounts from workers? • Money is worth more than people • How well do you Tip? • Remember your kids have friends who wait on tables

  42. Materialism

  43. Materialism It is best to be Poor

  44. The Disobedient Teen For I have come to turn • "'a man against his father, • a daughter against her mother, • a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— • 36 a man's enemies will be the members of his own household.' • 37 "Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; 3 • Matt 10:35-38

  45. The Disobedient Teen • When you are assembled in the name of our Lord Jesus and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, 5 hand this man over to Satan, so that the sinful nature a may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord. • 1 Cor 5:4-5

  46. Disobedient Teen • Likewise you also have those who hold to the teaching of the Nicolaitans. 16 Repent therefore! Otherwise, I will soon come to you and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth. • Rev 2:14-16

  47. The Disobedient Teen • 20 Among them are Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan to be taught not to blaspheme. • 1 Tim 1:19-20

  48. The Disobedient Teen • He then brought them out and asked, "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?" • 31 They replied, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved — you and your household." 3 Acts 16:30-32 Lift up the Word to your God

  49. The Disobedient Teen But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord." • Josh 24:14-15

  50. The Disobedient Teen • Practical • 1st Go and repent before your all your children for what you have done wrong • Warn your teen • Give them a chance to change • Follow Matt 18 If rebellion continues you must act.

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