Fallacies

1. Fallacies

2. “When your cable company keeps you on hold, you get angry. When you get angry, you go blow off steam. When you go blow off steam, accidents happen. When accidents happen, you get an eye patch. When you get an eye patch, people think you are tough. When people think you are tough, people want to see how tough. And when people want to see how tough, you wake up in a roadside ditch. Don’t wake up in a roadside ditch. Get rid of cable and upgrade to directv.”

3. “If today you can take a thing like evolution and make it a crime to teach it in the public school, tomorrow you can make it a crime to teach it in the private schools, and the next year you can make it a crime to teach it to the hustings or in the church. At the next session you may ban books and the newspapers. Soon you may set Catholic against Protestant and Protestant against Protestant, and try to foist your own religion upon the minds of men. If you can do one you can do the other. Ignorance and fanaticism is ever busy and needs feeding. Always it is feeding and gloating for more. Today it is the public school teachers, tomorrow the private. The next day the preachers and the lectures, the magazines, the books, the newspapers. After [a]while, your honor, it is the setting of man against man and creed against creed until with flying banners and beating drums we are marching backward to the glorious ages of the sixteenth century when bigots lighted fagots to burn the men who dared to bring any intelligence and enlightenment and culture to the human mind.” Clarence Darrow, The Scopes Trial, Day2http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/scopes/day2.htm.

4. Although I have attended only the Sunday school class, I can tell already that I am not going to like the worship service because the teacher used the King James Version of the Bible.

5. I didn’t pray this morning before I left for work; I was injured in an accident on the way to work, so not praying caused me to have an accident.

6. The apostle Paul was not ordained by God to preach the gospel to the Gentiles because he had previously been a persecutor of the church, responsible for the death of Christian believers.

7. The absence of Jesus’ claims to being God in the New Testament is why I am not a Christian.

8. Jesus is from God because Jesus was the only begotten son of the Father.

9. The church should either hire a full-time worship minister or it should stop having a worship service on Sunday mornings.

10. The minister’s claim that Jesus resurrected from the dead is false because the minister never came to visit my mother in the hospital before she died.

11. My church should share more of their resources with the poor, but how is the church going to pay off its eight million dollar debt by diverting funds to the poor?

12. Churches who do not give at least ten percent of their budget to foreign missions do not care for fulfilling the great commission.

13. The English professor who gave me a B instead of an A is as unfair as my brother who embezzled funds from the company.

14. Do you believe in heaven? • Answer: Heaven was another concept that didn't make sense to me. I knew people in my family that I dearly loved, but I knew who weren't going to heaven. How could it be heaven for me if those that I loved weren't going to be allowed in?

15. The problem of hell • Now, I have heard a response to the problem of Hell before that I would like to address before your class tries to make me look like a fool. Christians tell me “God doesn’t send people to Hell; they send themselves to Hell by rejecting him.” The problem with that response is that it is ridicules. That’s like someone pointing a gun at me saying, “Bow down and worship me, or I will shoot you,” and I don’t bow down so he shoots me, and then has the audacity to say I shot myself by not bowing down. But think about it; if you do bow down to this apparent monster, what is your reward? You get ‘the privilege’ of bowing down to the being that is torturing everyone you care about for eternity. Well, that doesn’t sound like “paradise” to me.

16. The Bible… Answer: It’s a book. The poetry aside is not too well written. I enjoy it though. But if you want to know if I believe in magic trees, talking snakes, talking donkeys, angels, demons, zombies, unicorns, dragons, global floods that left no geological evidence, a six thousand year old earth, bear’s killing children because they made fun of a bald man, witchcraft, curses, prophetic visions, miracles, making the sun stand still in the sky, rods that turn into snakes, water becoming whine, men walking on water, and using telepathy to save yourself from unavoidable eternal torture caused by a cosmic father that loves you, I would have to say no.

17. Purpose of Life My point is that humans haven't been placed on Earth for any specific reason. We're here purely as a result of lucky circumstances. A human's purpose in life is whatever he or she makes it. As for me, I always seek deeper understanding of everything around me. I delve into the deepest questions, searching for the most enlightening answers. My purpose is to figure out as much as I can about my existence and my place in the universe, and to draw upon this knowledge in order to live the most fulfilled life I possibly can.

18. Purpose of Life Answer: Simple. I got lucky. I came into this world and discovered that I wanted to live a happy life. I didn’t want anyone to steal my crap, and I wanted companionship. The lucky part is that I found that almost everyone else wanted the same thing, so we decided it was easier to reach our goals if we worked together, so that’s what we did and thus morality was born. Now you might respond by saying, “Well then under your view terrorists are not doing anything that is ‘really’ wrong; they are just doing what is ‘right’ to them.” To which I would respond, “That’s irrelevant because my group is bigger, and we’re going to kick their asses for standing against our ideals.” You could also say “Why should we want to live a happy?” to which I would say, “That’s completely irrelevant because the fact is the majority of us do.”