Write for Clarity and Conciseness….

Write for Clarity and Conciseness…. • Provide specific detail – answer the reporter’s questions • Use easily understandable words • Limit sentence, word, and paragraph length • Build coherent paragraphs

Provide Specific Detail Unclear: “Put enough air in your tires.” (How much air is “enough”?) Clear: “Fill your tires to 32 pounds per square inch.” Vague word Specific detail

Clarity—Answer Reporter’s Questions Reporter’s Questions = who, what, when, where, why, and how Unclear: “We bought a new machine to solve the problem.” • Who is “we”? • What is the “new machine”? • When was the purchase made? • Where was the machine located? • Why was the purchase made—what was the problem? • How much did the machine cost?

Answer the Reporter’s Questions More clear: The marketing department bought a new AABco laser printer ($595) on June 10 for our production room. This printer will produce double-side, color copies unlike our prior printer.

Clarity—Provide Specific Detail Unclear: The man asked for a raise. More clear: Jeff Jones asked for a 10 percent salary increase. Unclear : An employee presented a proposal. More clear: Kelly Jones, production manager, presented a plan to stagger working hours.

Clarity—Use Easily Understandable Words NOTE: Write to express, not to impress!Use words that are easy to understand. Unclear: “We are cognizant of your need for issuance of citations pursuant to code 18-B1 CPR violations.” Define abbreviations like “CPR.”

Clarity—Use Easily Understandable Words More clear: “We know you need to send citations because of code 18-B1 Continuing Property Record (CPB) violations. ” • Know instead of cognizant • Send instead of issuance • Because in stead of pursuant

Sentence Length 8 words 15 words 19 words 28 words Comprehension Rate 100% 90% 80% 50% Conciseness—Limit Sentence and Word Length Sentence length = 20 or fewer words Word length = 1-2 syllables average Source: American Press Institute

Conciseness—Limit Word and Sentence Length Not concise “During the month of July, I made a decision to positively impact my writing inabilities by having a meeting with an instructional advisor.” NOTE: This sentence is 23 words long, and it uses five words over two syllables (underlined).

Conciseness—Limit Word and Sentence Length More concise “In July, I decided to improve my writing by meeting with a teacher.” NOTE: This sentence is 13 words long, and it uses one word over two syllables (underlined). All words cannot be 1-2 syllables! You cannot shorten words like “telecommunications,” “engineer,” or “accountant.” Change the words you can; leave other words alone.

Conciseness—Emphasize the Important Ideas What are you trying to say? • Position the most important idea at the beginning of the sentence. • Make sure the most important idea is the subject of the sentence. • Place the main idea in a short sentence. All production and administrative personnel will meet at 2pm on May 23 in the main conference room, at which time we will announce a new plan of salary incentives. At 2pm on May 23, in the main conference room, all personnel will meet to learn about salary incentives.

Conciseness—Limit Paragraph Length What’s your reaction? Hard to read. Please prepare to supply a readout of your finding and recommendations to the officer of the Southwest Group at the completion of your study period. As we discussed, the undertaking of this project implies no currently known incidences of impropriety in the Southwest Group, nor is it designed to find any. Rather, it is to assure ourselves of sufficient caution, control, and impartiality when dealing with an area laden with such potential vulnerability. I am confident that we will be better served as a company as a result of this effort. General Guideline Paragraph length = 6 to 8 lines average (less is OK)

Conciseness—Limit Paragraph Length Easier to read Please prepare to supply a readout of your findings and recommendations to the officer of the Southwest Group at the completion of your study period. As we discussed, the undertaking of this project implies no currently known incidences of impropriety in the Southwest Group, nor is it designed to find any. Rather, it is to assure ourselves of sufficient caution, control, and impartiality when dealing with an area laden with such potential vulnerability. I am confident that we will be better served as a company as a result of this effort. NOTE: Shorter paragraphs are easier to read. Spacing gives readers a chance to stop, breathe, and digest the information. These paragraphs are still hard to read, due to the sentence and word length.

Coherence—Link ideas within your paragraphs… • Use a topic sentence to summarize the main idea of the paragraph • All support sentences in the paragraph should relate to the topic sentence. • Repeat a key idea using the same expression • Example: Employees treat guests as VIPs. These VIPs are never told what they can or cannot do. • Use pronouns to refer to previous nouns • Example: All new employees receive orientation. They learn ….. • Use transitional expressions to show connections • Examples include: however, as a result, consequently, meanwhile, etc.

Use Transitions for Coherence Continuation Pause Reversal • Also • Moreover • First... Second... • For that reason, • Therefore, • Additionally • and • For instance • For example, • Strictly speaking, • In other words, • In effect, • As a result, • or • However, • On the other hand, • Conversely, • Nevertheless, • Otherwise, • but

Write for Clarity and Conciseness….