Lord of the Flies Essay/Outline Revisions common problems

1. Lord of the FliesEssay/Outline Revisionscommon problems Common Core standards Ws 5. Develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning, revising, editing, rewriting, or trying a new approach, focusing on addressing what is most significant for a specific purpose and audience. There is no great writing, only great rewriting. -Justice Louis Brandeis

2. Quick Fixes MLA FORMAT PROBLEMS Wrong Font – No Page Number Double space Too many spaces Need to indent

3. Font TIMES NEW ROMAN… ALWAYS

4. Titles and Authors What’s wrong with this? Don’t forget the author’s first name! Novels use italics, not quotes In Goulding’s novel “Lord of the Flies,” Piggy… Spell the author’s name correctly

5. Titles and Authors What’s wrong with this? Don’t forget the author’s first name! Novels use italics, not quotes In William Golding’s novel Lord of the Flies, Piggy… Spell the author’s name correctly

6. Attention Grabbers! Making a great first impression Don’t start with the thesis, start with an attention grabber!

7. Attention Grabbers What’s the problem with these attention grabbers? Someone’s actions can drastically affect someone’s life. There are some great leaders on this Earth. People around the world all have different characteristics. They are all too general.

8. Attention Grabbers What’s wrong with these? Leaders represent the common people. Leadership is one of the most important qualities in any person. It might not be true.

9. Attention Grabbers How about these? Without the guidance of authority, the youth of the world would become evil and self-preserving. Martin Luther King Jr. is an American hero who fought for equality, not only for himself but for all Americans. As Jerry McClain once said, “The best example of leadership is leadership by example.”

10. Transitions Assume the reader has never read the novel. Write one or two sentences on what the novel is about (relating to your thesis). “In William Golding’s novel Lord of the Flies, a group of a boys are stranded on a deserted island after their plane crashes during a world war. Needing to elect a leader, they quickly choose Ralph, the boy who called them together using a conch…”

11. Concluding Paragraphs Movies don’t end with the climax But with the denouement. Don’t forget the universal statement at the end!

12. Concluding Paragraphs Restate Thesis Review some of the key points in the paper. DON’T USE THE CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH TO DISCUSS DIFFERENT THESIS PRONGS! End with a statement that is NOT about the novel. BE CREATIVE!