Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Intelligence A Scientific Approach to master Emotions and developing mind & happiness

Practicing Cost Accountant Management Consultant Chairman (Oral Coaching) ICAI – Ahmedabad Chapter Faculty for professional & Management Courses Corporate Training in prestigious institute & company, including Reliance, Adani etc. Special Interest : Uplift of society, through higher education, transformation through knowledge and helping people for enjoyment & happiness. 35 years industrial experience including Mafatlal Industries, Elecon Engineering Co. Ltd. Kairacan Company Ltd., Gujarat Alkalies & Chemicals Ltd., Cadmach Machinery Co. Pvt. Ltd. (A Zydus Cadila Group of Company) and 35 years academic experience. Faculty : CMA P D Modh (M.com, MBA, FCMA)

Whole program divided in following sections (1) Concepts of Emotions (2) Anatony of Brain and its functions (3) Brain chemistry (4) Mind Rules (5) Emotional Intelligence (6) ANT and Controlling them (7) Action plan for mastering (8) Measuring EQ (9) Preference reading for further interaction Index

Anatomy of Brain

Bell Theory Dual Representation Water Theory Connected Mind Theory Overload Circuit (ADD) ADHD Various Mind theory

We have identified twelve brain-based Executive Skills that are developed by young adulthood and are critical for decision making and regulation of behavior. They are : Self-Restraint : The ability to think before you act. It is the ability to resist the urge to say or do something to allow time to evaluate the situation and how a behavior might affect it. Working Memory : The ability to hold information in memory while performing complex tasks. It involves drawing on past learning or experience to apply to the situation at hand or to project into the future. Emotion Control : The ability to manage emotions in order to achieve goals, complete tasks, or control and direct behavior. Focus : The capacity to maintain attention to a situation or task in spite of distractibility, fatigue, or boredom. Objectives of program

Task Initiation : The ability to begin projects or tasks without undue procrastination. Planning and Prioritization : The capacity to develop a road map to arrive at a destination or goal, and knowing which are the most important signposts along the way. Organization : The ability to arrange or place according to a system. Time Management : The capacity to estimate how much time one has, to allocate it effectively, and to stay within time limits and deadlines. It involves a sense that time is important. Defining and Achieving Goals : The capacity to have a goal, follow through to the completion of the goal, and not be put off or distracted by competing interests along the way. Objectives of program

Flexibility : The ability to revise plans in the face of obstacles, setbacks, new information, or mistake. It relates to adaptability to changing conditions. Observation : The capacity to stand back and take a birds-eye view of yourself in a situation and to be able to understand and make changes in the ways that you solve problems. Stress Tolerance : The ability to thrive in stressful situations and to cope with uncertainty, change, and performance demands. Objectives of program

Defining what emotions actually are, and the seven core emotions There are three universal qualities that characterize emotions : A feeling component – physical sensations, including chemical changes in the brain; A thinking component – conscious or intuitive appraisal; An action component – expressive reactions (like smiles or scowls), as well as coping behaviors (fight or flight) Origin, Universality, Types and understanding of Emotions

Science : the meaning of a three-part brain Key take-aways Emotion drives reason more than reason drives emotion The brain’s hardwiring makes us more primitive than we might think. Feelings happen before thought, and they happen with great speed. Conscious thought is only a small portion of mental activity Visual imagery and other non-verbal forms of communication predominate. We perceive matters in ways that emotionally protect our habits and biases. The best way to predict outcomes is to account for the vagaries of human nature.

Getting Moving without Thinking Another of Darwin’s ideas is probably the most critical : that our emotions evolved over the course of our history to deal with the most important issues of life – with child rearing, friendship, mating, antagonisms – and the function of emotion is to get us moving very quickly without having to think.

Types of Emotions Let’s review them, one by one, noting first that, of them, one is essentially neutral : surprise. Five are negative : fear, anger, sadness, disgust and contempt. The other is positive : happiness. Moreover, happiness can be divided based on two different kinds of smiles, true smiles and social smiles. The latter involves only the mouth and may indicate deceit.

In Paul Ekman’s research, he showed these photos of faces depicting a range of emotions to people in different cultures, asking them what emotions were shown. University of emotions

A boy shows joy; a woman anger. The man is disgusted at seeing Paul ear canned food.

On the left, Paul Ekman demonstrates a simulated smile. On the right is a Duchenne (genuine) smile.

Emotional Intelligence Emotional Intelligence and the Project Manager : Emotional intelligence is the product of two skills : Personal and Social competence. Personal competence focused more on you as an individual, and is divided into self-awareness and self-management. Social competence relates to how you behave with other people, and is divided into social awareness and relationship management.

Pattern of mind

Remember that your brain is involved in everything you do, every decision you make, every bite of food you take, every cigarette you smoke, every worrisome thought you have, every workout you skip, every alcoholic beverage you drink, and more. When your brain works right, your body looks and feels better. When your brain is troubled, you have trouble with how you look and feel. A healthy brain makes it so much easier for you to have your best body possible. When your brain is working at optimal levels, you are more likely to stick to a diet, follow an exercise routine, and adopt healthy lifestyle behaviors. The brain is most complex organ in the universe. Respect It. The brain is the most complicated, amazing, special organ in the universe. Your brain weighs only about three pounds, but it is more powerful than even the most sophisticated supercomputer. Even though it represents only about 2 percent of your body’s weight, your brain uses about 25 percent of the calories you consume, 25 percent of the total blood flow in your body, and 20 percent of the oxygen you breathe. The calories, blood flow, and oxygen feed the cells inside your brain. Characteristics of Brain

To keep your brain and body in tip-top shape, protect your brain from injury. Don’t hit soccer balls with your head or ride a bicycle, ski, or snowboard without a helmet that fits. The brain has only so much reserve. The more reserve you have, the healthier you are. The less reserve, the more vulnerable you are. Specific parts of your brain are involved in certain behaviors. Trouble in specific parts of your brain tends to cause certain behavior problems. Understanding your brain can help you optimize it. PFC fully developed while person become adult. Before 20 years, he will not be able to take critical important decisions.

Prefrontal Cortex (PFC) Think of the PFC as the CEO of your brain. Situated at the front third of your brain, it acts like a supervisor for the rest of your brain and body. It is involved with attention, judgment, planning, impulse control, follow-through, and empathy. Low activity in the PFC is linked to a short attention span. Impulsivity, a lack of clear goals, and procrastination. Alcohol lowers activity in the PFC, which is why people do such stupid things when they get drunk.

Anterior cingulate gyrus (ACG) like to call the ACG the brain’s gear shifter. It runs lengthwise through the deep parts of the frontal lobes and allows us to shift our attention and be flexible and adaptable and to change when needed. When there is too much activity in this area, people tend to become stuck on negative thoughts or actions; they tend to worry, hold grudges, and be oppositional or argumentative. It also may make them more vulnerable to being obsessive or struggle with compulsive behaviors, and has been linked to eating disorders, such as anorexia.

Deep limbic system (DLS) lying near the center of the brain, the deep limbic system is involved in setting a person’s emotional tone. When this area is less active, people tend to be more positive and hopeful. When it is overactive, negatively can take over and lower motivation and drive, decrease self-esteem, and increase feelings of guilt and helplessness. Abnormalities in the limbic brain have been associated with mood disorders.

Basal ganglia Surrounding the deep limbic system, the basal ganglia are involved with integrating thoughts, feelings, and movements. This part of the brain is also involved in setting a person’s anxiety level. When there is too much activity in the basal ganglia, people tend to struggle with anxiety and physical stress symptoms, such as headaches, stomachaches, and muscle tension. With low activity here, people tend to lack motivation. This area is also involved with feelings of pleasure and ecstasy. Cocaine works in this part of the brain. Cookies cakes and other treats also activate this area, according to a fascinating new book called The End of Overeating by Dr. David Kessler, the former commissioner of the U.S. Food and Drug Administration.

Temporal lobes The temporal lobes, located underneath your temples and behind your eyes, are involved with language, short-term memory, mood stability, and temper issues. They are part of the brain’s “what pathway”, because they help you recognize and name what things are. Trouble in the temporal lobes often leads to memory problems, mood instability, and temper problems.

Parietal lobes The parietal lobes towards the top back part of the brain are involved with sensory processing and direction sense. The “where pathway” in the brain, they help you know where things are in space, such as navigating your way to the kitchen at night in the dark. The parietal lobes are one of the first areas damaged by Alzheimer’s disease, which is why people with this condition tend to get lost. They have also been implicated in eating disorders and body-distortion syndromes, such as with anorexics who think they are fat.

Occipital lobes Located at the back of the brain, the occipital lobes are involved with vision and visual processing. Cerebellum (CB) Located at the back-bottom part of the brain, the cerebellum is involved with physical coordination, thought coordination, and processing speed. There are large connections between the PFC and the cerebellum, which is why many scientists think that the cerebellum is also associated with judgment and impulse control. When there are problems in the cerebellum, people tend to struggle with physical coordination, slow processing, and trouble learning. Alcohol is directly toxic to this part of the brain. Improving the cerebellum through coordination exercises can improve your prefrontal cortex and also help your judgment and your body.

There are many simple things you can do on a daily basis to boost your brain function. Here are just a few things you can do to start. Protect your brain. Be conscious of how precious it is to you and your loved ones. Eat a good diet. Getting good nutrition is essential to good brain function and to a better body. A healthy diet includes lean protein, fruits, vegetables, nuts, and healthy fats like olive oil. Studies show that your brain works better if you eat nine servings of fruits and vegetables a day. Take daily vitamins, minerals and fish oil

Exercise. When it comes to the brain, exercise acts like the fountain of youth. It boots blood flow, increases the brain’s use of oxygen and improves your brain’s response to stress. It is the single most important thing you can do to keep your brain healthy and is one of the best ways to change your shape and improve your mood, energy level, sexual performance, and overall health. Get enough sleep. Getting at least seven hours of sleep at night has been shown to help keep your brain functioning at optimal levels, keeps your appetite in check, and helps your skin look younger.

Meditate. Meditation activates the most thoughtful part of the brain, so you can make better and more intelligent decisions. Relax. Learning how to counteract stress and calm your body helps your brain work better, puts you in a better mood, reduce high blood pressure, and protects you from disease. Practice gratitude. When you focus on what you love, your brain works better, you are more coordinated, and you feel better. Write down five things you are grateful for every day. In just three weeks you will notice a significant positive difference in your level of happiness.

Action Steptry physical activities that can help heal your brain and keep your body looking great

Dopamine : Dopamine is the chemical of motivation, salience, drive, and stimulation. Low levels are associated with low motivation, low energy, poor concentration, impulse-control problems, some forms of depression, Parkinson’s disease, and ADD. Action for Boost the Dopamine • Exercise, which helps increase blood flow and dopamine in the brain – especially doing an exercise you love. • Clear focus – make a list of weight and health goals displayed where you can see it every day. • Outside supervision – someone you trust checking in with you on a regular basis to help you stay focused. • Avoid impulsively saying yes to offers for more food or drink and practice saying, “No, thank you, I’m full”. Regaining Control Balance your brain chemistry

Serotonin : Serotonin is the chemical of feeling peaceful, happy, and flexible. When it is low, people suffer with some forms of depression, along with anxiety, obsessive thinking or compulsive behaviors. Regaining Control Balance your brain chemistry

Exercise to allow more of the serotonin precursor, L-tryptophan, to get into the brain. If you get a negative or food-oriented thought in your head more than three times, get up and go do something to distract yourself. Make a list of ten things you can do instead of eating so you can distract yourself. People with this type always do better with choices, rather than edicts. Do not tell them where you are going to eat or what they are going to eat; give them choices. Avoid automatically opposing others or saying no, even to yourself. If you have trouble sleeping, try a glass of warm milk with a teaspoon of vanilla and a few drops of stevia Action to Boost the Serotonin

Exercise Set goals Avoid automatically opposing others or saying no, even to yourself. Avoid impulsively saying yes. Have options. Distract yourself if you get a thought stuck in your head. Behavioral interventions that boost both serotonin and dopamine to help impulsive – compulsive overeaters

(3) GABA – GABA, or gamma-aminobutyric acid, is an amino acid that helps to regulate brain excitability and calms over firing in the brain. Action to Boost the GABA • Exercise • Try relaxation exercises, such as : * Mediation * Prayer * Hypnosis * Deep diaphragmatic breathing exercises * Hand-warming techniques • Kill the anxious ANTs • For sleep, try self-hypnosis, kava kava, or valerian root. Regaining Control Balance your brain chemistry

Endorphins : Endorphins are chemicals linked to feeling pleasure and eliminating pain. They are the body’s own natural morphine or heroinlike substances. Action to Boost the Endorphins The craving solution involves balancing the brain areas and chemistry of pleasure and control. It involves using your PFC as the master controller and making sure there is a bridle on the pleasure and emotional centers to help them guide you to where you want to go. Regaining Control Balance your brain chemistry

A youthful brain loves movement • A youthful brain is well rested • A youthful brain is well nourished • A youthful brain cultivates curiosity • A youthful brain is flexible • A youthful brain is optimistic • A youthful brain is empathic • A youthful brain is well connected • A youthful brain is authentic The Nine Keys to Staying Sharp IN LIFE

All-or-nothing thinking : You look at things in absolute, black-and-white categories. Overgeneralization : You view a negative events as a never-ending pattern of defeat. Mental Filter : You dwell on the negatives and ignore the positives. Discounting the positives : You insist that your accomplishments or positive qualities don’t count. Jumping to conclusion : You conclude things are bad without any definite evidence. Mind reading : You assume that people are reacting negatively to you. Fortune-telling : You predict that things will turn out badly. Magnification or minimization : You blow things way out of proportion or you shrink their importance. Emotional reasoning : You reason from how you feel : “I feel like an idiot, so I must be one”. “Should” statements : You criticize yourself or other people with “shoulds,” “shouldn’ts,” “musts,” “oughts,” and “have-tos”. Lebeling : Instead of saying, “I made a mistake,” you tell yourself, “I’m a jerk” or “a loser”. Blame : You blame yourself for something you weren’t entirely responsible for, or you blame other people and overlook ways that you contributed to a problem. DISORTED THINKING(Automatic Negative Thoughts)

Functions of the Deep Limbic System  Sets the emotional tone of the mind  Filters external events through internal states (Creates motional coloring)  Tags events as internally important  Stores highly charged emotional memories  Modulates motivation  Controls appetite and sleep Cycles  Promotes bonding  Directly processes the sense of smell DEEP LIMBIC SYSTEM

Moodiness, Irritability, Clinical depression • Increased Negative Thinking • Negative Perception of Events • Decreased Motivation • Flood of Negative Emotions • Appetite and Sleep Problems • Decreased or Increased sexual responsiveness • Social Isolation Problems in the deep limbic system

(1) Kill the Ants * Realize that your thought are real : #You have a thought # Your Brain releases chemicals # An electrical transmission goes across your brain. # You become aware of what you’re thinking • Notice how Negative Thoughts affect your Body • Notice how Positive Thoughts affect your Body • Notice how your Body Reacts to every thought you have. Deep limbic system prescription

(1) Kill the Ants / Feed your Anteater (2) Surround Yourself with People who Provide Positive Bonding (3) Protect your Children with Limbic Bonding (4) Building People Skills to Enhance Limbic Bonds (5) Recognize the Importance of Physical Contact (6) Surround yourself with Great Smells (7) Build a Library of Wonderful Memories (8) Consider Limbic Medications (9) Try Physical Exercise (10) Watch your Limbic Nutrition Deep limbic system prescription

Functions of the Basal Ganglia System  Integrates feeling and movement  Shifts and smoothes fine motor behavior  Suppresses unwanted motor behaviors  Sets the body’s idle speed or anxiety level  Enhances motivation  Mediates Pleasure / ecstasy Looking Into anxiety and fear

Anxiety, Nervousness • Panic Attacks • Physical Sensations of Anxiety • Tendency to Predict the Worst • Conflict Avoidance • Tourette’s Syndrome / tics • Muscle Tension, Soreness • Tremors • Fine Motor Problems • Headaches • Low / Excessive Motivation Problems in the BASAL GANGLIA system

Kill the Fortune-Telling Ants Use Guided Imagery Try Diaphragmatic Breathing Try Meditation / Self-Hypnosis Think about the “18/40/60 Rules” Learn How to Deal with Conflict Consider Basal Ganglia Medications Watch your Basal Ganglia Nutrition BASAL GANGLIA prescription

Functions of the Prefrontal Cortex  Attention Span  Perseverance  Judgment  Impulse Control  Organization  Self-Monitoring and Supervision  Problem Solving  Critical Thinking  Forward Thinking  Learning from Experience  Ability to feel and express Emotions  Interaction with the Limbic System  Empathy Looking Into Inattention and Impulsivity

Short Attention Span • Distractibility • Lack of Perseverance • Impulse control Problems • Hyperactivity • Chronic Lateness, Poor Time Management • Disorganization • Procrastination • Unavailability of emotions • Misperceptions • Poor judgment • Trouble Learning from Experience • Short-term Memory Problems • Social and Test Anxiety Problems in the prefrontal cortex

Develop and Maintain Clear Focus (The one Page Miracle) Focus on What you Like a Lot more than What your don’t Like Have Meaning, Purpose, Stimulation and Excitement in your Life Get Organized, Get Help when you Need It. Consider Brain-wave Biofeedback Training Try Audiovisual Stimulation Don’t Be another Person’s Stimulant Consider Prefrontal Cortex Medication Watch your Prefrontal Cortex Nutrition Try Mozart for Focus Prefrontal Cortex prescription

Functions of the Cingulae System  Ability to Shift Attention  Cognitive Flexibility  Adaptability  Movement from Idea to Idea  Ability to see Option  Ability to “Go with the Flow”  Ability to cooperate Looking Into Worry and Obsessiveness

Worrying • Holding on to hurts from the past • Getting stuck on thoughts (obsessions) • Getting stuck on behaviors (compulsions) • Oppositional behavior • Argumentativeness • Uncooperativeness; tendency to say no automatically • Addictive behaviors (alcohol or drug abuse, eating disorders) • Chronic pain • Cognitive inflexibility • Obsessive-Compulsive disorder (OCD) • OCD spectrum disorders • Eating disorders • Road rage Problems in the cingulate system

Emotional Intelligence