Hamlet

1. Hamlet

2. Sir Daniel IV

3. The Tonester

4. Act V

5. Let’s recap this dawg.

6. Uno King Hammy is dead. Claudius takes the crown with Little Hammy’s mom on his arm. Big Hammy’s ghost is seen. Uh oh. People are scurred that Denmark is going have a big war with Fortinbras of Norway, so Claudius sends ambassadors there to keep it cool. But Little Hammy doesn’t trust Claudius. He’s pouting that his mama married so quick, but then again, 2 months is plenty of time to move on and find a new man. Just ask Vince.

7. Dos Nevermind, I’m getting bored of recapping already. Let’s just move on to Act V.

8. ACT V!!!

9. Scene I Act V starts out with a doctor and a woman observing the Lady’s strange behavior. She sleepwalks around, explaining the blood on her hands that she can’t seem to get off.

10. Scene II This is outside the castle. The Scottish lords are chit chatting about the English army that is nearing them in the Birnam Woods. They will join some of the Scottish…I don’t remember that, but that’s what the site says.

11. Scene III Scene 3 starts out in the graveyard. Paris enters with a servant and scatters flowers on Juliet’s grave. He hears a whistle, which means someone is coming. He hides, and he sees Romeo enter with a crowbar and Balthasar at his side. He tells Balthasar to leave so he can retrieve a sweet ring he gave to Juliet. What an indian giver.

12. ADD is kickin in. Okay, bored with that. Seriously, let’s go. I have to work tonight and this is due tomorrow.

13. Ehh I don’t care. That’s good enough.

14. End of slide show, click to exit.

15. HAMLET Act V

16. Scene I The scene begins with a gravedigger and…someone else. They are talking about Ophelia and whether or not she drowned herself.

17. Funny Hour • Q: What do you call a person who builds stronger things than a stonemason, a shipbuilder, or a carpenter does? • A: The one who builds the gallows to hang people on, since his structure outlives a thousand inhabitants. (thanks to the gravedigger and that other guy.)

18. Word. Hamlet and Horatio enter and talk about the weird gravedigger. He’s singing and such, playing with skulls. Hamlet takes offense and babbles to his buddy, Horatio. He sparks up a conversation with the gravedigger.

19. Yup. They start talking about crazy little Hammy. (the gravedigger doesn’t know he’s talkin to the little Ham.) Hamlet asks him why Hamlet was sent to England. The gravedigger replies, saying because he’s crazy.

20. Skullz The Gravedigger…I’m giving him a name because I’m tired of typing that out, Gerald. That’s nice. Gerald shows Ham a skull that belongs to Yorick, a man who used to be the King’s Jester. Ham goes on a rampage, saying how he’s not making any jokes now, and a bunch of stuff. He even admits to kissing those lips…..

21. Yeah…okay

22. Sad. Hammy gets in a little crisis with himself, wondering if even Alexander the Great’s ashes are plugging a hole in a barrel. He thinks it’s bonkerz for such a great man, being able to patch holes in walls.

23. Enter. Laertes, Claudius, and Hammy’s mom enter the graveyard, with a corpse. It’s a tiny ceremony. Oh, a priest is there too. They are arguing, saying Ophelia, the corpse by the way, should have more rights. The priest argues she should have rocks thrown at her ugly body, since she killed herself.

24. Ham & Laertes Laertes babbles about being sad, Ham comes out of hiding, and says, hey, I’m Ham. Sweet jacket. Laertes says to hell with your soul. So they wrestle in the Ophelia’s grave. Sounds like one of Vince’s low budget films.

25. I loved her too. Hamboy tells Laertes that he’s all talk. He would eat a crocodile for Ophelia.

26. Wanted Name : Hamlet Height : 5’1” Weight : 276 lb. Nicknames : Ham/Hammy/ Hamboy Occupation : Being silly Favorite Movie : Star Wars II

27. Sneaky, sneaky. Hammy had a letter that talked about killing the big Ham. He intercepted the letter, and wrote a new one saying the two countries at war should make peace. Oh, and whoever is delivering the message should be terminated. Quick. Real soon.

28. Sure. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern were the messengers. I think. So they’re gonna die.

29. Ohh Claudius Hamdawgger wants to kill Claudius. He killed his dad, made his mom a hoe, and tried to kill him. Good enough for Ham.

30. Oh I forgot. We started scene 2 a bit ago.

31. Osric. He’s a guy that comes and talks to Hamleton and Horatio. He speaks highly of Laertes, and says that the King has placed a bet of six Barbary Horses, and has prepared 6 French rapiers and all their accessories. He says Laertes won’t beat Hamskeet by more than three hits in a twelve round match.

32. Party at Claudius’s! They all get together, the whole gang, and Hamstein and Laertes fence. But right before they do, Hamcat says he did not insult Laetes, his mental illness did. It doesn’t matter anyway, someone’s gonna die.

33. ATTENTION To help better understand Act V, Toni-strombolli has decided to hold an Act V fun night from 4-7 tonight. Snacks and refreshments will be provided from Tonisaur herself. Stop by for a good time.

34. Moving on.

35. Gerbil. Claudius says that if Hamtaco makes the first, or second hit, or if he makes the third hit, getting back at Laertes, he will drink wine to his health, and even put a sweet pearl in Hamslice’s goblet.

36. Shame… Hamlegs gets some good hits on Laertes, so Ham’s mom drinks some wine. But uh oh, she drinks the poisoned wine. That’s no good. Then the two fencers get into it, and wound each other. Now it’s just getting dangerous. I wonder if Laertes was using the poison tipped sword?

37. The end. The play ends here with the reader wondering whether or not Laetes used the poison tipped sword.

38. End of slide show, click to exit.

39. Or not.

40. Let’s wrap it up. Okay, Laertes and Hamface have are bleeding from the poison dipped sword. Gertrude, Hamears’s mom, collapses, but says she’s been poisoned first. Then before Laertes croaks, he says it was the King.

41. Die king. That’d be nice. Hamstaircase forces Claudius to drink…with his mean face that he’s making. Claudius dies. Hambagger then tells Horatio to tell everyone the truth. Too bad Horatio’s an alcoholic. He’s thirsty and wants some wine too, so he picks up the goblet. It’s okay though, Hamsandwich tells him not to drink it so he can spread the word.

42. Yay Fortinbras. He comes waltzing in and wonders why there’s dead bodies everywhere, so Horatio tells him some good stuff. He has come to be the King of Denmark. Hamsalad even said before he died, Fortinbras had his vote.

43. Almost there. Fortinbras says Hamstew would have been a great king, if he could have proven himself worthy. They carry out HAMLET’S body like a soldier, and shoot the cannons in honor of the big guy.

44. Bye.

45. Thanks • We would both like to thank Mr. Morrisroe for the inspiration to make this slideshow presentation. We’d also like to thank Hamlet for being in a play. Lastly, we’d like to thank Vince for having a funny shaped head for daniel to draw easily on paint.

46. Bibbers. • http://www.sparknotes.com/shakespeare/macbeth/section8.rhtml • http://www.sparknotes.com/shakespeare/romeojuliet/section16.rhtml • http://absoluteshakespeare.com/guides/summaries/hamlet/hamlet_summary.htm • http://nfs.sparknotes.com/hamlet/page_336.epl • Hamlet the book. HAHA yeah…right.

47. Q&A In the following slides, questions will be asked by your fellow presenters. They will call on people with their hands raised. The first person with the correct answer will get a hug from Toni Macaroni.

48. What “That 70’s Show” character does the Tonester remind you of? • A. Jackie • B. Fez • C. Donna • D. Eric

49. C. Donna

50. Who is this really? • Hitler • Dan’s dad • Bubbles • Stephen Michael Hamer Jr.