Kelly Wetherhold, M.Ed. 2011 Gifted Educator of the Year, PA National Palmarium Award Nominee

1. Kelly Wetherhold, M.Ed. 2011 Gifted Educator of the Year, PA National Palmarium Award Nominee Center for Integrated Behavioral Health Educator Salisbury High School Adjunct Faculty Seton Hall University Twitter: @kwetherhold kwetherhold.wordpress.com

2. Effective Strategies for Parenting the Gifted Child

3. Common Core: We already think that way... Core the “common” out of your child’s brain...

4. #1: Let’s not think “that way” #commoncore Parents and the world of education

5. So, let’s lead our thoughts astray... This is Flappy Bird...he/she is your child

6. ...and the concept of Flappy bird... is Gifted Education...

7. ...start with high hopes ...to a simple concept...

8. ...then play the game ...touch one gigantic obstacle, and fall...

9. ...it’s over... ...until you hit okay...and start again.

10. ...but always at the same start ...and always end with similar results.

11. ...feels a bit like parenting doesn’t it? same thing, different results.

12. Why? Parenting is so easy... ...just take a look at the mind of a kid!

13. and even easier as they age.. ...and only a few short years later! Judgment

14. We wish it were that easy... ...the reality: try to parent this...

15. Heck, try to educate this...

16. So what action do we take when... we do not understand something?

17. Misconception = simplify it to control it... You think you can control this?

18. Misconception, we treat education like a game... as if it can also be controlled...

19. ...but we cannot...similar results since Victorian age... ...so let’s start somewhere differently...

20. EFFECTIVE PARENTING Let’s change the game tonight... What you say What you want to portray Education’s play The instant gratification sway The technology way In dismay Education’s play

21. What you say A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you MIRROR IMAGE Top 5: 1. Uninteresting 2. Not challenging 3. Does not offer enough 4. That’s not the way “I” learned 5. Not enough homework A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

22. What you say Their reaction: Top 5: 1. loss of engagement 2. little to no application 3. “I’m bored” 4. Smug attitude toward work 5. Preferred activities take hold MIRROR IMAGE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

23. What you say Preferred activities: Top 5: 1. sports and clubs 2. socialization 3. AI...gaming 4. Media including TV, internet 5. anti-resiliency EDUCATION = A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

24. What you say MIRROR IMAGE What does this cause? Top 5: 1. negative emotions from both sides 2. negative emotions toward school 3. negative feedback loops multiple contexts 4. negative expectations 5. Failure regardless of intelligence A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

25. What you say What can you do? Habits: 1. reinforce with focus on effort and grit 2. develop short term goals at least once a week where you both participate 3. stress = challenge, you are model 4. become an amateur neuroscientist 5. how you praise is who you’ll raise We spend more time worrying about what do for work, and doing homework for our work, then we do understanding and empathizing with our children... A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

26. What you want to portray What you want to portray #1: Grit GRIT Long term goals and effort Let’s see where you stand... A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

27. What you want to portray Know Your Grit Consistency of Interests 1. I set a goal but later choose to pursue a different one 2. New ideas and new projects distract me from previous ones. 3. I am interested in new pursuits every few months. 4. My interests change from year to year. 5. I become obsessed with a certain idea or project for a short time but lose interest. 6. I have difficulty maintaining focus on projects that take a long time to complete. GRIT A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

28. GRIT What you want to portray Know Your Grit Perseverance of Effort 1. I achieved a goal that took a long time (months or years) to complete. 2. I overcome setbacks to conquer an important challenge. 3. I finish whatever I begin. 4. Setbacks do not discourage me. 5. I am a hard worker. 6. I am diligent. A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

29. What you want to portray Know Your Grit Grit = a modeled trait by parents TRUE GRIT = less neurotic agreeable extraverted open to new experiences No worries, your kids won’t look like him... A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

30. What you want to portray What you want to portray #2: Think Smarter, Not Harder... Differentiation not just for education Skills that pay the bills: problem-solving, empathy, EI, collaboration, creativity, critical thinking, self-awareness, risk-taking, communication, selling VISION skills: visionary, inception, synthesis, interrogative, openness, noticing DIFFERENTIATE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

31. What you want to portray What you want to portray #3: Willpower The candy test Deliberate practice with wait time SELF-DISCIPLINE IS A BETTER INDICATOR OF SUCCESS THAN IQ WILLPOWER A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

32. What you want to portray What you want to portray #4: Experience, Engage, Emotion Experiences are not about time spent Gifted children constantly engaging their emotions Often confused...to us awkward and at times annoying How you treat experiences with your kids will decide their fate Teach them how to experience EMOTION AND EXPERIENCE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

33. What you want to portray What you want to portray #5: Reframe and Repurpose Our brains constantly negotiate with negative memories Help reframe them Stressors are no longer threats, they are challenges Repurpose education...as they age: elementary school, middle school, high school REFRAME AND REPURPOSE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

34. THE INSTANT GRATIFICATION SWAY Instant Gratification Sway: IT STARTED WITH A MICROWAVE...TIME SELLS Millenials false sense of time False sense of security False sense of negotiations Know how to play games (education, life) extremely well False sense of reinforcement Overuse of expertise INSTANT GRATIFICATION A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

35. THE INSTANT GRATIFICATION SWAY Instant Gratification Sway CAUTION: EXPERTISE Expertise = recognition of a recognized pattern and automatic retrieval Brain actually prefers not to work Automatic retrieval = happy brain Too much expertise = minds that are inflexible Inflexible minds = deteriorated reliability Deteriorated reliability = frustration INSTANT GRATIFICATION A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

36. THE INSTANT GRATIFICATION SWAY Instant Gratification Sway: YOU MAY LOSE Deliberate practice: focus on certain skill set for extended period of time Communication skills Critical thinking Consistency and perseverance A genuine respect for education Remember: Expertise is the reason you could not complete the candle test at the beginning of this presentation A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

37. Education’s Play Education’s Play: Ideal Learning Environment Active Engagement Differentiation Sense of agency Self-Efficacy Focus on skills (skills that pay the bills and VISION for example) Process over product EDUCATION SHOULD BE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

38. Education’s Play Education’s play: The Reality Mind sets highly susceptible to environment, but... ...Education same system since late 1700’s Resiliency needs to be the goal, but... ...resiliency different for all individuals Common core, fancy term for data driven education...research still inconclusive Technology Too many players in the game THE REALITY A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

39. Education’s Play Education’s play: The Good News Teachers do care, more than you can imagine Administrators do care, definitely more than you can imagine and...if the community cares Education will shine EDUCATION’S DIRECTION A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

40. Education’s Play Education’s Play: What can you do today? Stop defending...really is not us vs. them Don’t become “mediated” Grow trust again Understand the stigma of “Gifted” education and embrace the negativity of it Embrace that everyone in this game is only human (yes, even administrators) Know your role: You are a parent except when developing a GIEP, then, you are an advocate Leave emotions at home, focus on goals KNOW YOUR ROLE A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

41. The Technology Way Technology Way: What you can do today... Appy hour Digital Archiving cln’s and pln’s digital storytelling MOOC’s TECH IS NOT GOING AWAY A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

42. The Technology Way Technology Way: Appy hour Duolingo Starfall Kahn Academy TED Codecademy Lumosity Learnist BrainPop Stitcher APPLICATIONS A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

43. The Technology Way Digital Archiving Stumbleupon Learnist Flipboard Zite Paper.li Buzzfeed Digg Reddit Pinterest Scoopit ARCHIVING A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

44. The Technology Way cln’s and pln’s Children’s Learning Network Professional Learning Network Advocate use of twitter, linkedin, google, blogging Parental fear often leads to failure of digital citezenship digital citizenship + building foundation = RRW NETWORKS A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

45. The Technology Way MOOC’s Massive open on-line courseware free from Universities ocw.mit.edu oyc.yale.edu oli.cmu.edu iTunes U One point about on-line learning... NETWORKS A gifted child’s expectations come directly from you Education’s play

46. In dismay ...this cannot be controlled...but

47. In dismay ...this cannot be controlled...but

48. In dismay ...this cannot be controlled...but

49. In dismay ...this cannot be controlled...but

50. In dismay ...this cannot be controlled...but