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Intermediate 2

Intermediate 2. Critical Essay Feedback. We are learning to: . Fully understand the feedback we have received . Success Criteria: I can: use my feedback in order to improve the quality of my work. . First of all…. Well done to those who managed to hand in your essay.

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Intermediate 2

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  1. Intermediate 2 Critical Essay Feedback

  2. We are learning to: • Fully understand the feedback we have received. • Success Criteria: • I can: use my feedback in order to improve the quality of my work.

  3. First of all…. • Well done to those who managed to hand in your essay. • For those of you who didn’t, you have failed to meet a deadline and are risking being ejected from the course. It has been noted and will be used for Monitoring and Tracking and Parents Evening.

  4. Today… • We are learning to understand the feedback I have given you. • Hopefully, if you understand your feedback, you will improve with each essay you complete.

  5. 1. The use of quotations • It is imperative that you use quotations throughout your Critical Essay. • If you do not do so, it will just read like a very long summary.

  6. For example: • Mrs. Mallard is held back in her marriage and this is clear through Chopin’s description of her appearance: • The lines of her face "bespoke repression“. • The use of the word “lines” conveys the idea that she appears to look old. However, the theme of control is conveyed through Chopin’s clever use of word choice. “Bespoke repression” demonstrates that she has aged through the lack of freedom available to her through marriage.

  7. 2. Expression / Tense • At times, we are guilty of writing our essays as if we are speaking. • We cannot write an essay using slang. • Also, if you read your essays back, sometimes, what we write doesn’t make sense. • Tense – be careful that you refer to the story in the past tense and not present. It has already happened.

  8. For example: • Chopin’s word choice is showing us / telling us • Chopin’s word choice conveys

  9. Note! • I am banning the use of the phrase: • This shows us • This tells us It is vital that we improve our use of expression and vocabulary!

  10. 3. Analysis • In some cases, when analysing the quote, people were just summarising the quote rather than analysing. • You must: • Mention the use of techniques • Explain how this is effective • What is conveys / portrays • Relate it to the question

  11. For example: • Mrs. Mallard is held back in her marriage and this is clear through Chopin’s description of her appearance: • The lines of her face "bespoke repression“. • The use of the word “lines” conveys the idea that she appears to look old. However, the theme of control is conveyed through Chopin’s clever use of word choice. “Bespoke repression” demonstrates that she has aged through the lack of freedom available to her through marriage.

  12. 4. Chronological Order • It is important that your essay follows the order of the story. • We cannot discuss Brently coming back into the house, then discuss her grief, then her death. • It just doesn’t make sense!

  13. 5. Spelling and Punctuation • The errors in spelling and punctuation was quite worrying. • You must edit your work carefully as you are assessed on your ability to use these skills.

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