1 / 37

Potent Parenting

Potent Parenting. Dr. Steven Craig & Dr. Ronna Smith-Craig Craig Counseling Services Birmingham, MI. What are we going to cover today?. Ideas about developing a philosophy or guideline for parenting Various parenting approaches A specific method for thinking about your parenting approach.

gordon
Download Presentation

Potent Parenting

An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author. Content is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use only. Download presentation by click this link. While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server. During download, if you can't get a presentation, the file might be deleted by the publisher.

E N D

Presentation Transcript

  1. Potent Parenting Dr. Steven Craig & Dr. Ronna Smith-Craig Craig Counseling Services Birmingham, MI

  2. What are we going to cover today? • Ideas about developing a philosophy or guideline for parenting • Various parenting approaches • A specific method for thinking about your parenting approach

  3. What is Parenting? Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child – from infancy to adulthood.

  4. Importance of having a goal or philosophy of parenting • Gives you a guide for the long-term • Helps you to not just to REACT to behavior and situations • Helps you be CONSISTENT in your parenting

  5. there are many Common Parenting Approaches

  6. “Spiritual Parenting Model” • Respect the child's individuality • Make space for the child to develop a sense of their own beliefs • Focuses on the child’s individual personality and their own potential

  7. “Slow Parenting Model” • Less planning and organizing for children • Allow children to enjoy their childhood • Explore the world at their own pace

  8. “Strict Parenting” • Authoritarian approach • Places strong value on “discipline” • Focuses on preparing children to survive and thrive in a harsh world

  9. “Attachment Parenting Model” • Seeks to create strong emotional bonds • Avoids physical punishment and accomplishes discipline through interactions • Recognizes a child's emotional needs • Focuses on holistic understanding of the child

  10. No “One Method Fits All” Your parenting approach will depend on: • Your child’s temperament, interests, skills, motivations • Your (and your co-parent’s) temperament, motivations and your own comfort levels • Your family situation

  11. A Tale of Two Boys Part One

  12. A Tale of Two Boys Part Two

  13. Beneficial Parental Behaviors We know children benefit when their parents: • Communicate honestly and give clear explanations • Stay CONSISTENT • Provide structure, routines, and clear expectations • Use community resources • Take an active interest in child's educational and early developmental needs • Have a strong awareness of what child is doing/learning …and how it affects them

  14. Approaches to Discipline • Rules of traffic • Instructional approach • Parents explain how to behave with little explanation of deeper moral and social implications • Fine gardening • Belief that children have positive and negative qualities • Parents "weed out" or "prune” away negative qualities.

  15. Approaches to Discipline (continued) • Reward and punishment • Desired behavior  reward or praise • Unwanted behavior  punishment or reprimand • Concerted cultivation • Foster children's talents through organized leisure activities • Parents challenge their children to think critically and to speak properly and frequently, especially with other adults.

  16. someParenting Spectrums Rules/Expectations Spectrum Involvement Spectrum

  17. Rules/Expectations Spectrum

  18. Authoritarian Style Authoritarian Parenting Style Attributes Children raised according to this style often: Are moody, unfriendly, unhappy Exhibit undesirable behaviors Have problems in social situations and in school • Demands obedience • Results in punishment • Roles and expectations are rigid • Children have little input • “Patriarchal” style

  19. Permissive Style Permissive Parenting Style Attributes Children raised according to this style are often: Impulsive Aggressive Rebellious Underachieving • Little structure, few rules • Parents lenient toward misbehavior • Children set the roles, rules and expectations • Parents avoid conflict with children • Punishment rarely used to enforce rules and expectations

  20. Authoritative Style Authoritative ParentingStyle Attributes Children raised according to this style often: Are energetic Exhibit self-reliance Strive to achieve • Clear roles and expectations • Children are allowed input • Reason and authority used, but child’s perspective is considered • Parents monitor instead of “rule”

  21. Involvement Spectrum

  22. Rejecting Parenting Characteristics ofRejecting Parents Children raised according to this style often: Feel unwanted Develop serious psychological problems Are underachieving • Parent REJECTS the role of parenting • Fails to pay attention to the child’s needs • Too involved meeting own needs and wants

  23. Over-Involved Parenting Characteristics ofOver-involved Parents Children raised according to this style are often: Dependent Anxious Underachieving • Hovering (“Helicopter Parent”) • Fail to allow child to make decisions or meet their own needs • Interrupt child’s ability to function independently

  24. Involved Parenting Characteristics ofInvolved Parents Children raised according to this style often: Tend to be respectful of self and others Tend to have resourceful behavior • Balanced style • Parents meet child’s needs • Allow child responsibility for age-appropriate self-care and personal growth • Attentive to child • Do notdo for child what he/she is capable of doing for self

  25. Questions or Comments Approaches to Parenting

  26. One Model of Parenting A spectrum of roles

  27. Spectrum of Involvement Most Least Roles of a Parent

  28. Appropriateness of Parent’s Role Changes • With the age of your child • With safety/seriousness of given situation Minor hassle……………………………………………………...Major disaster

  29. Least involved form of parenting • Trust child’s ability to handle given situation • Most appropriate for competent kids with non-urgent problems • Child learns within "safe" circumstances • Sympathetic listening • No unwanted advice, as long as circumstances remain "safe"

  30. Parent's advice may be accepted or rejected by child • Use when child has some competence, but mistakes could be more seriously or permanently harmful to self or others • Not appropriate when child doesn't have the option to reject advice • Parent shouldn't repeat "advice" over and over • Helpful to get child to "buy into" receiving advice beforehand • Helpful to set the stage before offering advice

  31. More intrusive parenting role • Use when child needs step-by-step help with a problem or situation • Allow child input in the problem-solving process and/or choices made • Active listening is still important • This role may also involve the roles of Observer or Director at times

  32. Most intrusive form of parenting --“The Buck Stops Here” • Choose when: • A problem is serious enough • Safety is a major concern • The problem directly and seriously violates someone else's rights

  33. Requires: • Clear thinking • Emotional self-control on your part • Hard work • Clear limits and clear consequences • Use less frequently with older children

More Related