“ The right way to begin is to pay attention to the young, and make them as good as possible.”

1. BULLYING…. “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter” “The right way to begin is to pay attention to the young, and make them as good aspossible.” -Socrates

2. BULLYING • “A student is being bullied when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to negative actions on the part of one or more other students”….. Dan Olweus

3. IT’S A BIG OCEAN OUT THERE Where are the… weakfish BARRACUDA

4. WEAKFISHBullying through the eyes of a child • Michael Dorn • This book chronicles the struggle faced by 1 in 10 students in schools today • One boy’s true journey through unconstrained bullying/harassment • Great book study for any staff/easy read • Practical solutions for students/staff • Surveys for school climate

5. So, “What About Girls?” • Sugar and Spice and everything nice or Not? Have we missed something

6. The Development of Childhood Aggression: Boys Will Be Boys, But What About Girls? by Nicki Crick, Ph.D. • Boys} Physical aggression- Behaviors in which physical damage serves as the agent of harm/ physical harm • Boys} Tend to be concerned during social interaction with physical dominance/ territoriality

7. Relational Aggression • Girls focus more on relational ties during social interaction • Girls exhibit behaviors in which damage to relationships or threat of serves as the vehicle of harm • This includes direct and indirect acts such as threats to end a relationship unless peer complies; using social exclusion to retaliate; spreading rumors to encourage peers to reject a classmate

8. Life Span of Relational Aggression Preschool: (Girls are more than boys) • Ann and Susan playing at recess. Tiffany comes over and starts to talk. They covered their ears to block her out. • Jill and David were playing dress-up in a corner. David put on a hat that Jill wanted. They argued back and forth until Jill said, “I’m not going to be your friend anymore.” David still kept the hat. Jill then said,” I won’t be your BEST FRIEND.” David gave in. Video Clip

9. Life Span Middle Childhood You hear things like: • I’m not going to be your friend anymore • Tell your friends not to be that kid’s friend • Tell a lie on them • “We’re going to be in this group, and you’re not going to be in it.” • Two girls wear certain clothing, jewelry and don’t inform the other friends

10. Life Span Adolescence • Talk about them behind their backs and to their face, exclude them • Pretend to be friends, then stab them in the back • Tell them what you think of them in front of others, to embarrass/control • Ignore them, don’t return phone calls • Try to steal boyfriend

11. Life Span Early Adulthood • Women hurt other women by the amount of affection they receive from men. • Build up a coalition of other people against the person. • Talk about them and try to ruin their friendships with others. Gossip!!! • Give them the silent treatment/ act cold • Seduce the person’s dating partner

12. Relational VictimizationCan Lead To: • Peer rejection • Externalizing problems • Depressive symptoms • Loneliness • Cigarette, alcohol and marijuana use • Obesity • Romantic relationship/dating problems

13. Friendships and RA • Self disclosing (in person, phone, computer) to a friend that is aggressive. They have lots of info to use against them. It keeps the friend where she wants her. • In fourth grade, girls that are friends with RA girls become more aggressive

14. Types of Intent • Hostile: She wanted me to ruin my shoes! She wanted to get even. • Benign: She tripped over a rock in the road and then fell into me. • Note** Some girls have a hostile bias

15. Instrumental vs Relational • Girls react to different types of RA • Instrumental: reaction to an aggressive act • Relational: reaction to relationships • Social-Information- Processing Model • “Salvaging Sisterhood”- resource

16. PEACEFUL SCHOOL BUS

17. PEACEFUL SCHOOL BUS PROGRAM • Developed by an elementary principal and Olweus Trainer • Designed to decrease inappropriate behaviors on bus • Very little cost- $99.00 • All materials included in the guide • 15 minute DVD of program overview • CD ROM –posters, bus decals, handouts, Parent letter, training outline

18. School bus route meetings • Bus drivers, parents, students, teachers, administrators are present • Team building exercises • Pair older with younger students • Talk about bullying-define it on bus • Get to personally know their driver

19. Ordering Information:Peaceful School Bus Program • Written by James Dillon, M.S. • Hazelden • 1-800-328-9000 (24 hours) • Order online at: hazelden.org/bookstore

20. WHY TRY • Intervention Program • Whytry.com • Visuals and music interventions • Journal component • Role play • Can be utilized in ISS classroom to help with “blind spots”

21. HRSA • U.S. Department of Health and Human Services/ Health Resources & Services Administration • STOP BULLYING NOW campaign • www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov • Everything is free!! • Updated every 60 days

22. Campaign Overview and Goals • Raise awareness about bullying • Prevent and reduce bullying behaviors • Identify appropriate interventions for “tweens” (youth ages 9-13) • Foster and enhance partner linkages- Now over 80 different organizations

23. About us…. • Youth Expert Panel provides guidance in creating Webisodes, messages • Research involving school bullying statistics • Youth-led Initiatives (Project Change, SADD, NOYS)

24. For Youth:Tips, Webisodes and Games • What You Can Do- Tips if you are being bullied, witness bullying, or bully others • Cartoon Webisodes • Profile of the Month- Webisodes characters facing bullying situations • Educational games

25. For Adults:Prevention & Intervention • Tip Sheets and Resources- 40 tips, ready to be downloaded/printed • Customized tip sheets for families, school staff, educators, law enforcement, etc. • New on the website: cyberbullying & Bullying among youth on perceptions and differences in sexual orientation

26. DVD Tool Kit & Activities Guide • Instructor’s Guide & DVD collection of ALL SBN video content, including Webisodes, PSAs and workshops • Activities Guide- 12 pages of ideas for developing your own campaign

27. Web Site Updates • For Adults: State by state map on bullying laws • For Youth: MyPlace pages • For Both: “Ask the Experts” section

28. Next Webcast • Hot Topic: Cyberbullying • Discussions of latest cyber bullying research and tips • For information and to register, check StopBullyingNow.hrsa.gov

29. For more information…. • CAPT. Stephanie Bryn, MPH – sbryn@hrsa.gov • Dr. Susan Limber, PhD • slimber@clemson.edu • Jason Smith • JasonSmith@widmeyer.com

30. Let’s check out the DVD • Webisodes • PSAs • Video Workshops

31. BULLYING AND THE LAW • Bernard James • Pepperdine University School of Law • “Human Rights and Understanding Current Reform”/ Liability and Other Considerations • Working definition of bullying • Courts are unwilling to turn bullying into a human rights issue • Effects of bullying

32. Topics Continued • Effects of bullying • Prevalence of bullying in schools • The school as the solution • Bullying as a function of school climate • Proactive Whole School Approaches to prevent bullying • Redefining supervision • Test your “Bullying IQ”

33. Suicide As A Viable Option • Child Focus, Inc. • 513-752-1555 • Factors that lead to the unthinkable • Multi-Factorial Event: 1. Hopelessness 2. Negative Thought Patterns 3. Impulsivity 4. Psychological Vulnerability

34. Hopelessness • Element of Depression • Inability to see potential for a better future • Negative thought patterns

35. Continuum of Negative Thought Patterns • Continuum---- from mild self-critical thoughts to extreme self hatred to suicidal thoughts • Self-destructive behavior– from self-denial to substance abuse to actual suicide • Relation between these 3 continuums exist- how a person is thinking is predictive of how they are behaving • Each person is divided/conflicted

36. Impulsivity • People with this trait may not stop and think about the real consequences of their death

37. Psychological Vulnerability • People who are rejected because they are “weird”, because of their sexual orientation, or because they don’t fit in • Trauma • Loneliness • Relational, social, work or financial loss

38. Indeliable Links To Look For • Hopelessness Burdensome Persistence Isolation

39. Bullying Lethality Screening System (BLSS) Assessment Tool to use when students are bullied to determine their risk for suicide 5 Factors of the BLSS 1. Bullying 2. Isolation 3. Depression/Anhedonia 4. Suicidal Ideation & Planning 5. Resiliency/ Protective Factors

40. Literature Links To Bullying • Chrysanthemum • Crowboy • Stargirl • Tangerine • Teammates • Thank You Mr. Falkner • The Brand New Kid • The Hundred Dresses • The Opposites of Fate • The Sneetches • To Kill A Mockingbird • William’s Doll

41. ALL ACCESS PRODUCTIONS • “No More Victims” musical presentation • Primary target middle/high schools • Actors are young adults/diversity • Carries a message for bullies, victims and bystanders • Promotes the message of love and acceptance/tolerance to evoke thoughtful change and healing in our youth

42. Tour Information • Kelsey Koslowski- Tour manager • Office Phone: 631-366-1000x13 • Tour Cell Phone: 631-681-8630 • Email: kkoslowski@accessny.org • Fax: 631-366-4826 • Address: 70 New York Ave. Smithtown,NY

43. International Bullying Prevention Association 7th Annual Conference • Mark the date! November 15-17 • Seattle, Washington • “CyberWorld” comprehensive • 1-800-293-9071 • info@stopbullyingworld.org