presents:

1. fa presents:

2. Communicating Conflict • Ma Chung University • Malang, 14th February 2013 Santi Djiwandono - EBA

3. Conflicts happen do V

4. communications components receiver message channel sender encoder decoder feedback context

5. easy to forget communication components 5

6. easy to forget communication components 6

7. easy to forget communication components 7

8. easy to forget communication components distrust external timing internal 8

9. Communicate with good skill & good will

10. Body Language • is the management of time, space, appearance, posture, gesture, vocal prosody, touch, smell, facial expression, and eye contact

11. we’re wired this way

12. Body Language • is in the eye of the beholder • warmth & authoritative leaders • personal connection, affection, respect • open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full frontal body orientation, positive eye contact, synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles • erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures

13. Body Language • not all instant impressions are accurate • they don’t consider context • find meaning in a single gestures • they don’t know the baseline • evaluate through the filter of personal biases • evaluate through the filter of cultural bias

14. Body Language - for Leaders • successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’ physical gestures • aware that their body language dramatically impacts colleagues, clients, staff • the most well-meaning behaviors will sometimes be misinterpreted • ever alert to finding authentic ways to align verbal and non- verbal communication

15. Listening • we will become good listeners only when we can acknowledge that we have a lot to learn

16. Blocks to Effective Listening • competition • fear • judgements • lack of time

17. Are you really listening?

18. Learn to Listen • recognize non-listening behaviors • focus on the speaker • paraphrase • know your own feelings ~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~

19. How • build integration & engagement • communicate with good skill & good will • adaptive

20. Common Ground • vision/enemies/sense of urgency • identify • learn • share • measure

21. Authentic Leaders

22. Thank you

23. Reflection Questions • When (time or circumstances) do you fail to listen well on the job? • Think of someone in your organization who listens well. Can you describe what he or she does that leads you to fell heard? • What would you do to make more time for listening at work?