Empowering Parents as Sexuality Educators for Their Children

1. Chapter 19 Sexuality Education

2. Quote for the day PARENTS ARE THE SEX EDUCATORS OF THEIR CHILDREN - WHETHER THEY DO IT WELL OR BADLY.”- - DR. SOL GORDON, world-renowned sex educator

3. Did you know? • Learning about sex is a lifelong process • We learn the basics as children and build on these fundamentals in adolescence. • We need to update, revise, and sort out the barrage of information on sexual issues. • There is a great deal of controversy about the who, what , where, when and how of sexuality education.

4. Who Decides What Gets Taught? • Federal Policies • There is no national law or policy on sexuality education. • 1981 Congress passed Adolescent Family Life Act, which provides funding for the teaching of abstinence as the only option for teenagers. • 1996, TANF Act made $250 million in federal funds available to states over a 5-year period to support programs that promote abstinence.

5. Objectives of Abstinence in the 1996 TANF Act

6. Who Decides What Gets Taught? • Federal Policies • In 1999 all 50 states plus Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands applied for and received TANF funds, although CA & NH chose not to use it. • Abstinence-only classes must teach that sex should be confined to married couples, it does not define “abstinence” or “sexual activity.” • CDC has funded HIV education since 1988.

7. Who Decides What Gets Taught? • State Policies • Different states have different policies regarding the teaching of sexuality education, and the policies may vary within a state as well. • A state may have no specific policy on sex education, but still “recommend” specific courses of action. • More states require schools to offer HIV or STI education than general sex education.

8. Sexuality Education Map

9. Sexuality Education Map

10. Sexuality Education Map

11. Who Decides What Gets Taught? • Local Policies • Even where state policy on sex education exists, oversight is left to the local school district. • 1999 study found that two-thirds of U.S. school districts have a district-wide policy to teach sex education. • 88% of public secondary school principals reported that school districts and local governments have at least some influence on their schools’ sex education curricula.

12. Controversial Issues in Sexuality Education Reported by Principals

13. Where Should Sexuality Education Be Taught? • At Home • Many parents believe that sexuality education is a parent’s job. • Not all parents are willing or able to provide accurate information or opportunities to discuss sexuality. • A child’s sex education does not begin with a discussion of “birds and the bees” but with parental attitudes from birth about their bodies.

14. Where Should Sexuality Education Be Taught? • At Home • Children learn as much about sex from a parent’s tone of voice or facial expression as from words they use. • Research on the impact of talking to child about sex on his or her later attitudes and behavior. • If parents want to impact their child’s sexuality education, they need to talk early and talk often.

15. Where Should Sexuality Education Be Taught? • At School • Majority of pubic school students take sex education sometime between 7th-12th grades. • Typically, these classes are taught within another course, such as health, and cover just a few class periods. • Students who receive sex education know more and feel better prepared to handle different situations and decisions. • Most people (87%) approve of sex education in schools, but disagree on the grades it should begin.

16. Preferences of parents and teachers versus what is actually taught in sexuality education courses

17. Where Should Sexuality Education Be Taught? • School • Dr. Mary Calderone, founder of SIECUS • SIECUS - moving force for education about human sexuality in the schools & community. • Ideally, formal sex education programs in schools complement rather than replace what parents are teaching their children at home. • The emphasis of most school programs has been of prevention of disease and pregnancy.

18. What Should Sexuality Education Courses Teach? • Traditionally limited to” plumbing.” • First national model for comprehensive sexuality education in the United States was developed by SIECUS in 1990. • The primary goal of sexuality education is the promotion of sexual health. • Include accurate information, opportunity to ask questions, help develop interpersonal skills

19. What Should Sexuality Education Courses Teach? • A very vocal opposition to sexuality education represents the minority view. • American Life League • The Eagle Forum • The Best Friends Foundation • The majority of parents want schools to go farther than they currently do on topics of reproduction and abstinence, HIV/AIDS, and other STIs, and to address issues often labeled controversial, like abortions and sexual orientation, as well as to teach safer sex and negotiation skills.

20. What Should Sexuality Education Courses Teach? • Sexual abuse is another sticky topic - by warning children of negative aspects, it gives the message that sex is dangerous. • It is important to present a balanced, complete education about human sexuality. • Sex education often focuses on the mechanics of sex; comprehensive sexuality education includes values and meaningful connections to specific behaviors.

21. Does Sexuality Education Make A Difference? • Early sex education movement in the United States emphasized the dangers of sex and the need for self-control. • Sex education does not lead to sexual activity. • The most effective sex education programs combine contraceptive education with lessons on how to resist peer pressure.

22. Do Parents Talk About Sexuality? Do Children Listen? • Almost everyone agrees that parents should be the primary sexuality educators of their children • Many parents abdicate this responsibility and allow peers and the media to be the primary sources of sexuality information. • Some parents feel “Ignorance is bliss” or it will encourage children to experiment.

23. Do Parents Talk About Sexuality? Do Children Listen? • Most parents think the appropriate age to talk with their child is later • What effect does the parental “talk” have on children? • Children whose parents talk to them are more likely than others to postpone sexual activity. When they do become sexually active, they have fewer partners and are more likely to use contraceptives.

24. How to Talk to Your Children About Sex • Don’t wait for your children to ask questions. • Find “teachable” moments. • Relax and be “ask-able.” Share your feelings, values, and beliefs. • Know your facts. • Listen, listen, listen. • The joys are just as important to teach as the dangers.