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China Essay Analysis . I. Introduction . The introduction can’t just be the thesis. You MUST include some background information. You need a specific thesis statement with clear areas of analysis: Poor Thesis: Confucianism and Legalism were two important philosophies in China.
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I. Introduction • The introduction can’t just be the thesis. You MUST include some background information. • You need a specific thesis statement with clear areas of analysis: • Poor Thesis: Confucianism and Legalism were two important philosophies in China. • Okay (but not great) Thesis: There were many similarities and differences between Confucianism and Legalism.
I. Introduction • Great Thesis: Confucianism is a more effective philosophy than Legalism because it highlights the importance of filial piety, allows the smartest people to be in government and does not consist of harsh punishments. • Great Thesis: The two philosophies are different because of how much harsher Legalism was to the people, but also similar because they both believed in strong centralized governments. Confucianism is much more effective than Legalism because people value freedom over stability.
Organizing the Paragraphs • Thesis: Confucianism is a more effective philosophy than Legalism because it highlights the importance of filial piety, allows the smartest people to be in government and does not consist of harsh punishments. • What will the first body paragraph be about?:
Another effective ways of organizing the paragraphs • Introduction • Similarities between the philosophies • Differences between the philosophies • Which philosophy is most effective and why? • Conclusion
Things to Avoid • I believe / I think • In this essay, I will discuss • As you can see