Partnering for Eternity (PFE)

1. Partnering for Eternity (PFE) STUDENT AND PARENT ORIENTATION for New Participants

2. Our History • The seeds for Assist and PFE were planted in the early 1970s when a young elementary school girl felt God had called her to make a difference in someone’s life by regularly visiting a person unable to leave her home. She heard about just such a lady, who was forced to leave a successful career due to illness, causing her to move in with her son’s family.  One day during this difficult time, the girl knocked on the door and asked if there was a shut-in she could visit. The family eagerly agreed and she began visiting a number of times every week. The girl and the woman formed a special relationship where both began to thrive. The family never forgot the incredible difference those hours spent together made in all of their lives. 

3. Our History, Cont’d • God blessed the family and 35 years later they were seeking ways to share a portion of the bounty God had given.  They desired for their funds to encourage young people to visit those lonely. They wanted to support SDA schools while encouraging students to build intergenerational relationships and develop a strong work ethic - and that is why you are here! • Through Southern Adventist University, Assist and PFE exist to make this happen in communities across the nation.  One young girl with a desire to serve made a massive difference in not only that woman’s life but in many others.  Her visits over 35 years ago are now responsible for over 600,000 hours of visits with $7.5 million dollars donated directly to student’s tuition in SDA elementary schools and academies.  • YOU have the ability to make a difference! • YOU could change a life! 

4. Who do we need? • We need YOU: • A student who is committed to visiting a mentor and impact their life • A student who wants to serve, grow, and build a relationship with this mentor • A student who wants to make a difference • A student who wants to learn all they can from a mentorship • A student who is open to having their own life changed in a positive way

5. How does it work? You, and a parent or guardian, will visit your Mentor: • For one hour • Once per week • Every single week of the school year • Submit a reflection form online for every visit you make according to your school’s weekly deadlines And you will get: • $25 per visit, per week in scholarship towards the tuition at the school you are attending • Joy in knowing you are making a difference in your Mentor’s life!

6. Steps to a Successful PFE Year • Step 1: Choose Your Mentor • Step 2: Apply Online • Step 3: Set Up Your Visits • Step 4: Visit! • Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit

7. Step 1: Choose Your Mentor Find a Mentor: • With whom you can form a relationship • Who has healthy cognitive capabilities (no Alzheimer’s or severe dementia) • Who might be lonely and is needing some company • Who might have similar interests or hobbies • Who is able to commit to one hour, once per week for the entire school year • Who is NOT related to you by any degree • Who you might be acquainted with at church or as a neighbor

8. If you are visiting someone in a nursing home • If you are serving in a nursing home you are not “general staff” • No washing dishes, cleaning up after meals, etc. • You still need to be interacting with 1 person on your visits.

9. Step 2: Apply Online • Go to www.southern.edu/pfe • Click on the iConnect website link at the top of the page • This website is also where you will be submitting your visit reflections, so go ahead and bookmark it! • Hover over “Students” in the top right corner, and click “Create Account”

10. Step 3: Set Up Your Visits • Once your application is approved by your Coordinator: • Contact your Mentor to set up weekly visits • Setting up visits for the same day, same time every week will make your commitments easier to remember • Make sure that you schedule your visits around vacation time • If you or your Mentor becomes sick and cannot make the visit, reschedule another time when you can make up your missed visit • Only one visit, once per week, unless you are doing a make-up. Make sure you get approval in advance from your school Coordinator for make-up visits. • Only one extra total visit allowed per month (5 visits in a 4-week month is OK if the extra visit is a make-up)

11. Step 4: Visit! • Make sure you talk with your Mentor to see what they would like to do during your hour together. Your parent or guardian must be present during the full hour. • Be on time, and let your Mentor know ahead of time if you need to reschedule. • Activity Ideas: • Create with your mentor a calendar of visits, events, birthdays, graduation, vacation, and much more; a printable calendar is on our website, www.southern.edu/pfe, under “Resources for Participating Students” • Ask your mentor to teach you how to bake something • Share with your mentor a cool book you have been reading at school • Each share a hobby with the other and learn something new • Do some chores together that your mentor has been wanting to get done • Ask your mentor to help you with some difficult homework The ideas are endless! Work with your Mentor to see what activities fit best for the both of you.

12. Step 4: Visit! (continued) • Unacceptable PFE Activities—these will not be awarded with scholarship: • Watching TV all the time—if there is a special show you would like to share together once in a while, that is fine • Being on your phone or ignoring your Mentor—this is a time to share together • Visiting your Mentor alone—your parent or guardian must be with you the whole time • Visiting your Mentor’s home while he/she is away • Sharing Mentors—siblings may be paired with a married couple or two individuals in a nursing home and may visit for one hour total—but visits should be conducted one-on-one in order to form a personal relationship • Each Mentor should only be paired with one child • No bouncing between Mentors—you should have only one Mentor per year, unless something unfortunate happens where you need to switch mentors • Scholarship will not be awarded for visits happening at a school event or during Sabbath hours

13. Miscellaneous Visit rules • Time that students spend with mentors during a school function is not to be reported to PFE scholarship. • Siblings may not attend visits • Students may not “back-fill” visits • Say our program begins September 1, but you are not able to begin until October 1. The scholarship that you accrue begin on October 1 and you cannot report make-up visits for time missed in September. If you miss too many visits, as per your school’s rules, you may be dropped from the program

14. Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit • Head to iConnect using the same steps as you did to apply to PFE: • Go to www.southern.edu/pfe • Click the link for iConnect • Bookmark the iConnect website for ease of access • Hover over “Students” and click “Login” • Use the email and password you applied with to log in • Once logged in you will see your “Dashboard”; click “Submit New” in the red box

15. Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit (continued) If you did a make-up (extra) visit in one week, you will need to submit two reflections for each hour done. Indicate on one of your reflections that it is a make-up by clicking the box at the top and explain the reason for your extra visit. Use this list also for ideas of what you can do in a visit with you Mentor. Every time you engage in activities with your Mentor: • You will have a positive impact in someone’s life • Your Mentor can become your friend, mentor, confidant, and guide • You can minimize the isolation and loneliness experienced by your Mentor

16. Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit (continued)

17. Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit (continued) What we are looking for is evidence that you (the student) and your Mentor are developing a relationship. Include your Mentor’s name or a fake one if they do not feel comfortable with you sharing. Use the same name for your Mentor for the whole year—but change it if you need to switch mentors. Some things to think about while writing your reflection: • What you learnedabout your Mentor • How you helped your Mentor • What you did with your Mentor • What you liked about what you did with your Mentor • What you think your Mentor liked about the visit • Another option is to include: What you say, What did you do, What did you learn? Write one-two sentences for each grade level (4th grader will write at least 4 sentences). Include a picture or story that you would like Southern Adventist University’s PFE office or the PFE donors to have.

18. Step 5: Reflect on Your Visit (continued) Visit reflection rules: • Your Visit Reflection must be submitted by the weekly deadline of 3 days. • You are allowed 1 late reflection each month. • The deadline for students to re-submit incomplete reflections is 2 days. • Submitting right after your visit is easiest! • Your Visit Reflection must be truthful, accurate, and complete. No scholarship will be awarded for visits not submitted online. • If your child is too young to type on their own, have him/her dictate what is to be written. Read the prompts if they do not know what to say. • Your CHILD must be the one dictating/writing the reflections…NOT THE PARENTS.

19. Examples of Awesome Reflections • From aKindergartener • “I like going to spend time with Paula L.” Paula and David spent their time doing a craft – making sand jars. Then they went for a walk and threw a nerf football back and forth. The rest of the time was spent on a puzzle. Paula is helping David learn his states and their capitols. • From a 4th Grader • “Janet and I talked. Janet’s leg was hurting so I put lotion on it and rubbed her leg. I put window stickers up on her window to cheer up her life. The stickers were pictures of puppies and kittens. I also read our favorite story from Uncle Arthur bedtime stories. We like it that Jesus’ scarred hands show how much He loves us.”

20. Examples of Awesome Reflections • From a 7th Grader • “Today, I made Raisin Ribbon Bars with some help from Miss Barbara. We used a nut chopper that was seventy years old. The bars turned out good and yummy. While we worked, we talked about what it was like for her growing up in the Philippines as a little girl. Those stories make me want to go there some day.”

21. Reasons why a visit/ reflection will be incomplete • A reflection may be marked incomplete for any of the following reasons: • Student did not write a summary of appropriate length • The summary is moderately incoherent or contains a great many grammatical mistakes. • Activities, length of time, or purpose is unclear. • Student recounts visit in minimal detail • Summary does not mention mentor’s name or pseudonym • Growth of relationship or learning is not evident • Reflections seem identical every week.

22. Reasons why a visit reflection will be Rejected • A reflection may be rejected for any of the following reasons: • Reflections are not submitted by the deadline. • Reflection was marked incomplete and sent back to the student and has not been re-submitted by the resubmission deadline. • Reflection was marked incomplete and sent back to the student and still does not meet required length. • Reflection was marked complete and sent back to the student and still does not reflect enough clarity in writing. • Unacceptable activities.

23. Yearly Survey • Each year, you will be asked to complete a survey. This 10-question or less survey will ask about your relationship with your mentor and your experience so far with PFE. • Please note that this survey is required and part of participating in the program. • The PFE office at Southern Adventist University and your Coordinator thank you for providing information that can help to make the program better for you and students across the country.

24. Fundraisers • Southern Adventist University covers 70% of the cost leaving RAA to fundraise the remaining 30%. • Various fundraisers are planned over the course of the school year and volunteering at a MINIMUM of 3 is required. • September 22: Fall Fair (on a Sunday) • March 6: TK-6th Grade Jog-a-thon (Week Day) • Oct. 19: Outdoor Movie (Weekend) • March 15: Talent Show (Weekend) • April 19: Mother & Son Banquet (Weekend) • Bake Sale TBD (Friday) • Pancake Breakfast TBD (Weekday)

25. Working with Senior Adults

26. What Do Senior Adults Want? • To feel that they are in control—don’t boss them around • Dignity and respect—don’t dismiss what they have to say • To be recognized for the things they have done and are doing • Someone to listen and talk to • Attention from those they love & respect • Privacy and respect for their “space” • Freedom and independence for as long as possible • Friends, young and old • To be in touch spiritually

27. How to Start a Conversation • Make positive observations about their room, home, yard, photographs, etc. and sincerely compliment them • Act interested, but not too nosey • Ask them if there is anything you can do to help them • Always be respectful—use “Mr.” or “Mrs.” unless told otherwise

28. Safety Precautions • Always be on the lookout for tripping hazards such as loose or torn carpeting, loose thresholds, broken tiles, and electrical cords • If a stove fire starts, turn off the burner and slide a lid over and call for help or 911 • Note where the fire extinguisher and baking soda are in case of fire • Parent or guardian is always to be present in case of safety concern

29. Be Safe Around Medications • It is important to take medicine that is meant only for YOU • Be prepared in case of an emergency: • Call the poison control center at 1.800.222.1222 • Or call 911

30. Stroke Signs

31. Physical Limitations of Senior Adults • Hearing Loss—What do I do if my Senior Mentor can’t hear me? • Be patient and speak clearly • Face the person when you talk • Don’t shout • Avoid talking while eating or chewing gum • Be willing to patiently repeat what you said

32. Physical Limitations of Senior Adults • Vision Loss • They may not always instantly recognize you • They may need you to be their “eyes” at times Speech Loss • Their voices may become weaker and harder to understand – be patient

33. Physical Limitations of Senior Adults • Complaining • Because of their frustrations, they may complain about family, living situation, health, etc. • Don’t feel you have to solve their problems for them • Practice “active listening” by repeating what you think they said and offering sympathy

34. You’re Ready! • You are now prepared to embark on this journey with your Mentor! If you have any questions now or throughout the year, contact your school’s Coordinator. They will be your first line of contact. • If you have any questions that your Coordinator cannot answer, have them contact us. • THANK YOU for using your time in such a way to make a Mentor’s day! We need more people like YOU in the world!

35. Contact Information • Your Coordinator at Redlands Adventist Academy: • Chaltu Sandiford • csandiford@redlandsacademy.org • 909-793-1000 x. 114 Southern Adventist University’s PFE Office: • 423.236.2560 • pfe@southern.edu