Are You Kidding Me? Parents as Partners In the PSE Experience

1. Are You Kidding Me?Parents as Partners In the PSE Experience Brooke White, Director - Student Development & Support Beth Oakley, Director - Educational Development Centre

2. What has changed in the relationship between university students and their parents?

3. Relationship changes • Technology - instant and constant communication • Prolonged period of adolescents • Parents and their students welcome the increased level of involvement and communication

4. Story sharing • Groups of 4-5 • Discuss a unique circumstance that your university experienced with a “helicopter parent” • How did you resolve it?

5. Survey says…… • National Survey of College Parent Experiences (2006) • High level of communication • College Parents of America Survey • 74% of current college parents communicate at least 2-3 times per week while they are at college/university • 34% contact on a daily basis • 90% use cell phones • 58% use email frequently

6. College Parents of America Survey • 29% instant messaging • 7% regular mail • 90% attended parent orientation • 75% visit campus at least once or twice a semester • 17% visit once a month or more

7. Parent & student contact • 72% of respondents agree: • “I feel that my child’s college/university includes parents in the school community”

8. How should universities respond? • Embrace rather than push away • Look for the positives of having them involved • Let go of telling them to “let go” • Accept that the consumer attitude is here to stay • Forward thinking universities can channel the involvement positively and productively

9. Parent involvement -questions of concern • Academics - 34% • Finances - 24% • Career planning - 12% • Health and Safety - 12% • College Parents of America Survey (2006)

10. Students’ most requested advice or assistance from parents • Finances - 35% • Academics - 19% • Health & Safety - 5%

11. Parents contacting universities • Top 3 reasons identified by parents as to why they contact universities • Concern for their student • To resolve an issue • To complain

12. Increase in parent interaction attributed to: • Concern for safety • Student development • Consumerism perspective • Technology

13. Parent cheerleaders

14. The emergence of the “Helicopter Parent” • Media Stories • ABC -Do Helicopter Moms Do More Harm Than Good? • Newsweek -parents buying text books and follow syllabi • Globe and Mail - parents handing out resumes at career fairs • Parent Groups • College Parents of America, Arlington Virginia • Web Support Groups • www.mofchat.com

15. “Helicopter Parents” Involvement: • Took their children to sports practice and games • Took their children to lessons, music, dance • Arranged for tutors for their children • Talked to children’s teachers about their grades • Advocate for students with disabilities • Use the phrase “we” when discussing details of a request for your child, or when discussing child’s performance

16. “Helicopter Parents” • What may have been considered “involved” in their grade school years, could very well become helicopter behaviour when in university/college • Sometimes occurs when parents see education as an economic investment and they want to ensure that their investment “pays off”

17. Initial university/college responses to these behaviours • “parent bouncers” • Parent liaison offices • Don’t call them, they’ll call you • Parents given the strong message that it’s time to “let go”

18. Emerging philosophy from the universities • More attempts to foster the relationship with parents to make them our partners and utilize their close relationships in more positive ways • Orientation programs, parent websites, chats, listservs, parent/family weekends

19. Typical parent program content of the 1990’s • The provision of a variety of information about campus life sprinkled with advice on letting go and allowing students to be the adults that we expect them to be • Made assumptions that parents hadn’t changed when in fact they had

20. U of Windsor - parent program • 20 year history • Designed to compliment student orientation and occupy parents • Eventually recognized that it is also a time of transition for parents • Provided programming that we thought would benefit the parent and the student

21. U of Windsor - parent program - in the beginning • Initially - heavy on student development theory • Utilized lectures and skits to illustrate types of transition issues faced by new students and their families

22. U of Windsor - parent program -embracing change • As parental involvement grew, the program was revamped to provide more balance between factual information and student development information • Although received with strong reviews, more changes were made

23. Recognize and capitalize on the the student/parent bond • Parents were still being “intrusive” • Communication from campus community told us that others were also experiencing this • Realization that parents and students today now have a very close bond and are interdependent

24. Embrace parents as partners • Began to examine ways that we could encourage parents to act as our partners (coaches/mentors to their students rather than “fixers”) • Support our efforts to assist students to become independent and confident problem solvers and self advocates

25. Campus consultations • Collaborate with campus community about the nature of their interactions with parents • Provide them with information on the characteristics of today’s students and their parents • Develop other means for communicating with parents • Goal is to best serve the student, the parent and ourselves

26. Benefits of embracing parents as partners • Reinforcement of just-in-time information • Make the information meaningful to their own experiences • Help to keep expectations realistic by being up to date with university expectations • Ask for students input

27. Meeting parents’ current needs • Consider what parents want and need to know • Sequence the information based on Maslow’s hierarchy of need theory • Develop learning outcomes • Learning outcomes + relevant information for parents = positive development for students

28. Consider varying parent populations • What do they need to know based on who they are? Parents: • Of first generation students • Of students with disabilities • Who are university grads • Of students living in residences • Of students commuting • Of international students

29. When do we really need them to be involved? Issues surrounding • physical and mental health • financial concerns • crisis situations

30. Parent service providers: programming • Parent Orientations • Parent handbooks and resource guides • Parent receptions • Parent websites • Listservs • Telephone help lines • Newsletters -paper and electronic

31. Programs & services • Parent weekends • Technology based communications • Emails -weekly, monthly, biannually • Monthly webcasts, pod casts, • Online workshops • Message boards for advice and feedback • Parent councils -more U.S. based

32. Final words of advice • Be clear and upfront about your desire to partner • identify learning outcomes you are targeting • Provide easy to understand information about student development • Provide a consistent philosophy and desired outcomes across campus

33. Final words • Develop crisis management protocols for communication with parents • Keep in touch with your students and ask them what they need parents to know • Listen, listen, listen to parents’ concerns • Keep up to date on resources

34. Web resources University of Windsor Parent Program http://www.uwindsor.ca/parents National Resource Centre for First Year Experiences http://www.sc.edu/fye/ National Association for Student Personnel Administators http://www.naspa.org National Orientation Directors Association http://www.nodaweb.org

35. Additional Resources • National Survey of Parent Programs http://www.parent.umn.edu/ParentProgSurvey.pdf • APPI – Administrators Promoting Parent Involvementhttp://www.appi.gmu.edu • New Directions for Student Services • Consumers, Adversaries and Partners: Working with the Families of Undergraduates. Number 94 Summer 2001 • Serving the Millennial Generation. Number 106, Summer 2004