Understanding Bullying

1. Understanding Bullying “Clarkston School District September 18, 2013

2. Identifying Risk • “Don’t shoot the messenger!”

3. BULLYING PREVENTION-STARTS WITH YOU!EVERYONE HOW?

4. “Myths About Bullying”

5. Bullying is not the same thing as conflict. TRUE. Bullying is aggressive behavior that involves an imbalance of power or strength. Often, bullying is repeated over time.

6. Most bullying is physical (involves hitting, shoving, kicking). FALSE. The most common form of bullying—both for boys and girls—is verbal bullying (e.g., name-calling, rumor spreading).

7. Bullying is not simple a simple problem. It is a complex problem and demands complex solutions.

8. Mistreatment! • Rudeness • Bullying

9. Define Rudeness? • Rudeness is to disregard. • It diminishes and demeans. • Rudeness is control through invalidation. • It bruises and wounds. • By treating others curtly, we put them in their place, which is a way of controlling them. • Through rudeness a person dominates, intimidates, threatens, and humiliates.

10. Unfocused Rudeness • Generic and mindless and does not bear the sting of hostility. • Comments • Noise • Sounds • Looks • Focused Rudeness can become bullying! BULLYING DEFINITION

11. "A student is being bullied when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to negative actions on the part of one or more students." One of the most commonly used definitions of bullying behavior is the one developed by Dr. Dan Olweus:

12. Bullying is……. • Bullying is not always about anger. • Bullying is not always about conflict. Bullying IS always about POWER

13. Bullying is Unlawful

14. Bullying: IT’S the LAWRCW 28A.300.285 For an action to be considered bullying, it needs to meet the following definition: • Harassment, intimidation, or bullying means any intentionalelectronic, written, verbal, or physical act, including but not limited to one shown to be motivated because of his or her perception of the victim's race, color, religion, ancestry, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, or mental, physical, or sensory handicap or other distinguishing characteristics, when the intentional electronic, written, verbal, or physical act: • Physically harms a student or damages the student's property; or • Has the effect of substantially interfering with a student's education; or • Is so severe, persistent, or pervasivethat it creates an intimidating or threatening educational environment; or • Has the effect of substantially disrupting the orderly operation of the school.

15. Bullying: IT’S the LAW • “Other Distinguishing Characteristics” can include, but are not limited to: • physical appearance • clothing or other apparel • socioeconomic status • gender identity

16. Bullying: IT’S the LAW • HIB can take many forms, including: • slurs • rumors • jokes • innuendos • demeaning comments • drawings • pranks • gestures • physical attacks • threats or other written, oral or physical actions.

17. Forms of Harassment / Bullying Harassment Race Sex Religion Disability National Origin Sexual Orientation Retaliation Other Distinguishing Characteristics Social Economic Status Dress Size Age Grades Hazing Sex-race-exclusion

18. Two requirements for conduct to trigger potential liability for unlawful harassment or bullying: • the conduct must be unwelcome - subjective; and (2) the conduct must be sufficiently severe (one time) or pervasive (repeated)to unreasonably interfere with a students ability to get an education.

19. Intent vs Impact • Impact of the victim? • Impact in and of itself isn’t necessarily enough to make it unlawful • Intent of the offender? • Intentionalharassment indicates maliciousnessand will “jump you across the line” of what is considered unlawful behavior.

20. “Crossing the Line” • Unreasonably interfere with the educational environment? • Substantially interferes with a student’s educational benefits, opportunities or performance. • Threatening, intimidating? • Or merely an offensive utterance? • Words as “weapons”?

21. Simply stated, bullying… • Bullying is a form of aggressive behavior (physical, verbal, social, written, and electronic) that is intentional, hurtful (physically and/or psychologically), andpersistent. ANY ACT REASONABLE FEAR REPEATED Repeated Harmful Acts and an Imbalance of Power Most experts agree this is what separates bullying from other conflicts

22. Teasing swap roles with ease isn’t intended to hurt pokes fun, light-hearted innocent motive discontinues when person becomes upset or objects to teasing Bullying is one-sided, power basis intended to harm humiliating, cruel, thinly disguised as “just joking” laughter directed AT target, not WITH target continues regardless of objections Difference Between...

23. PARENTS

24. Warning Signsthat your child may be the target of bullies • Frequently teased, taunted belittled, ridiculed, intimidated threatened, dominated or subdued • Has a derogatory nickname • Regularly has bruises or injuries that can’t be explained • Has belongings taken or damaged • Few or no close friends at school

25. Warning Signs • Frequently socially isolated • Less assertive or lacks the skills to respond to others’ teasing or harassment • Appears weak or easily dominated • Tries to stay close to a teacher or other adult at recess or breaks

26. What To Doif you suspect your child is being bullied • Talk with your child • If your child is being bullied, they need to have a voice in how the situation is handled. • Contact the school • Contact police or school resource officer…

27. Recommendationsif you suspect your child is being bullied • Don’t encourage your child to fight back—two wrongs don’t make a right! • Teach them to ignore the behavior • Do not validate the bully • Find a friend or adult to talk to • Listen to your child. • Don’t confront the parents or the other child directly. • Avoid bringing your child and the bully together to elicit an apology or resolve the issue. • Diary their day at school each night.

28. Warning Signsthat your child may be bullying others • Frequent name-calling • Regular bragging • A need to always get his/her own way • Spending more time with younger or less powerful kids • A lack of empathy for others • A defiant or hostile attitude; easily takes offense • Frequent misbehavior at school (e.g. name calling, teasing, intimidating, physical aggression)

29. Internet Safety • What can parents do to reduce the risks?

30. Cyberbullying: Methods • E-mails-emailing gossip to groups, forwarding private mail • Chat rooms-virtual room, real-time conversations • Instant messaging-subscribers create a contact list of those they want to communicate with

31. Reducing the Risks….. • Establish rules for internet use • Keep the computer in a common space • Have your kids check with you before setting up something online. • Kids should not send photos of themselves unless you approve • Kids need to check with parents before going into a chat room

32. Reducing the Risks….. • Kids need to be told never to agree to meet anyone they meet online without parental permission • Learn what your child is doing on the internet • Know what websites they are visiting • Monitor your credit card bills

33. Messages for your Children… • If someone online asks too many personal questions be suspicious and disconnect • Think before you send an email –you can’t control where your words will go • If kids receive unwanted, mean, threatening, offensive, harassing email, they need to report it to an adult

34. Harassment by other students • Don’t respond • Confront? • Talk to someone • Block access • Turn the computer off

35. Together, students, staff, andparents… “Taking a stand against bullying" to promote safe, respectful, nurturing learning communities.