The Grudge Holder

1. The Grudge Holder

2. The grudge-holder suffers from an unusual kind of wound. Although a grudge is associated to a past conflict with another, it is a wound that is inflicted. Remarkably, it’s healing is hindered because of a lack of desire. It is actually a cherished or desired, spirit of resentment; a welcomed feeling of ill-will toward another. You might say the grudge-holder is glad to be mad at someone. If so, it is about the only gladness that comes from grudging.

3. One thing that you will never see is a happy grudge holder. His mind is troubled because the object of his grudge becomes the object of his thinking. He continually rehearses and relives his mistreatment – even magnifying it. With each recollection comes more bitterness and resentment, if not self pity. Harboring a grudge defiles the heart, poisons the thinking and produces misery The grude-holder will be hard pressed to rejoice in the Lord as encouraged in Phil 3:1

4. Phil 3:1 Finally, my brethren, rejoice in the Lord. • Prov 23:7 For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: • Matt 15:18-20 But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. • 9 For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: • James 4:11 Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law:

5. Grudges can easily become a wedge of division. As the tongue advertises the grudge-holder’s flavored grievance in search of sympathy and allies, some are apt to be influenced and prejudiced – especially by kinsmen and friends. Their thinking and conduct toward perpetrators of this “great injustice” are adversely affected and, thus, others become involved in a way that threatens unity in the church. As Paul wrote, 1 Cor 5:6 Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump?

6. Example – Moses, Aaron & Miriam • Num 12:1-4 And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman. 2 And they said, Hath the Lord indeed spoken only by Moses? hath he not spoken also by us? And the Lord heard it 3 (Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth.) 4 And the Lord spake suddenly unto Moses, and unto Aaron, and unto Miriam, Come out ye three unto the tabernacle of the congregation. And they three came out.

7. Example – Moses, Aaron & Miriam • Num 12:5-9 And the Lord came down in the pillar of the cloud, and stood in the door of the tabernacle, and called Aaron and Miriam: and they both came forth. 6 And he said, Hear now my words: If there be a prophet among you, I the Lord will make myself known unto him in a vision, and will speak unto him in a dream. 7 My servant Moses is not so, who is faithful in all mine house. 8 With him will I speak mouth to mouth, even apparently, and not in dark speeches; and the similitude of the Lord shall he behold: wherefore then were ye not afraid to speak against my servant Moses? 9 And the anger of the Lord was kindled against them; and he departed.

8. Example – Moses, Aaron & Miriam • Num 12:10-14 And the cloud departed from off the tabernacle; and, behold, Miriam became leprous, white as snow: and Aaron looked upon Miriam, and, behold, she was leprous. 11 And Aaron said unto Moses, Alas, my lord, I beseech thee, lay not the sin upon us, wherein we have done foolishly, and wherein we have sinned. 12 Let her not be as one dead, of whom the flesh is half consumed when he cometh out of his mother's womb. 13 And Moses cried unto the Lord, saying, Heal her now, O God, I beseech thee. 14 And the Lord said unto Moses, If her father had but spit in her face, should she not be ashamed seven days? let her be shut out from the camp seven days and after that let her be received in again.

9. Many churches have been made to suffer unnecessary and irreparable harm through the influence of grudge-holding brethern. None is more deceived than the Christian who thinks he can hold a grudge without jeopardizing his soul. Calling it something else doesn’t remove the problem. Even when it may not be apparent, we can be tempted to harbor a deep-seated resentment and bitterness toward others. We must be honest with ourselves. God says to put away ALL bitterness, wrath, anger, and malice. Do we believe it?

10. Eph 4:31-32 Let allbitterness, and (all)wrath, and (all)anger, and (all)clamour, and (all)evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgivingone another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

11. Finally, no matter how justifiable the grudge may seem, it is always an expression of contempt and hate. God commands us to love one another. • John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. • 1 John 3:11-12 For this is the message that ye heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. 12 Not as Cain, who was of that wicked one, and slew his brother. And wherefore slew he him? Because his own works were evil, and his brother's righteous.

12. 1 John 4:7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. • Even our Enemies • Matt 5:44-45 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; 45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

13. Eph 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. • Forgiveness – man’s greatest blessing. How desperate we need it, yet the grudge-holder would forfeit it by withholding it from others. • Brethern, let’s get grudges out of our hearts and out of the church today and keep them far away.