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STOP RETELLING US WHAT HAPPENS!

STOP RETELLING US WHAT HAPPENS!. To know practical ways to avoid retelling the plot. 1. “When”. Adding “when” to the beginning of a sentence that simply retells the plot forces you to say something about it and move into analytical thinking.

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STOP RETELLING US WHAT HAPPENS!

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  1. STOP RETELLING US WHAT HAPPENS! To know practical ways to avoid retelling the plot

  2. 1. “When” • Adding “when” to the beginning of a sentence that simply retells the plot forces you to say something about it and move into analytical thinking. • Retelling: Eve blackmails Karen to get the role of ‘Cora’. Add “when”:When Eve blackmails Karen to get the role of ‘Cora’…What could you add?…her tone of voice is no longer demure and gentle, but harsh and forceful, enhancing the sense that she is a calculating “killer”.…it demonstrates that she is willing to do anything for a “part that good”.

  3. You try: • Karen decides to teach Margo a lesson.Something you might discover:If you don’t have something to say about that scene once you have restructured the sentence, why did you mention it in the first place?

  4. What did you come up with? • When Karen decides to teach Margo a lesson, …When Karen decides to teach Margo a lesson, it is a result of her frustration from Margo’s seemingly childish behaviour.

  5. 2. Nominalisation • The process of changing your verbs to nouns and making them the focus of your sentence Verbs describe the actions that people, nations and things carry out in the textAddison slaps… Lloyd fails to… Margo feels… Karen decides…

  6. Turning verbs into nouns Lloyd fails toask Karen if Eve may play ‘Cora’.Lloyd’s failure to ask Karen if Eve may play ‘Cora’ …____________________________________Karen decides to teach Margo a lesson. Karen’s decision to teach Margo a lesson, is…

  7. Effect • Now it forces you to say something about the failure, rather than just telling us it happened (which we know!)Lloyd’s failure to ask Karen if Eve may play ‘Cora’ indicates that…Lloyd’s failure to ask Karen if Eve may play ‘Cora’ coincides with…Lloyd’s failure to ask Karen if Eve may play ‘Cora’ causes…

  8. Analysis Verbs • Once you have nominalised the verbs describing actions in the novel, the new verbs in your sentences (should) become analytical onesrepresentssymbolisescausesdemonstratesindicateshighlightscatalysescausesis enhanced with the use of (insert technique)ETC

  9. What happens if a verb doesn’t have a noun? • E.g. Addison thinks he is “essential” to the theatre.‘Addison’s thought’ doesn’t sound quite right.You come up with a synonym for the verb and change it a noun.thinks = believes -> beliefAddison’s belief that he is “essential” to the theatre…revealsindicatesis consistent with

  10. How can I do this with my own writing? • If you find yourself describing something that happened in the text – cross it out and start the sentence again.E.g.Birdie believes • (I know ‘believes’ is a verb because that’s the word I would change to make it past tense.)Birdie believesBirdie’s belief that …. shows that….

  11. Nominalisation - You try Eve presents herself as sweet and submissive. It makes her seem non-threatening to the characters she plans to manipulate for self gain. 1. Find the verbs2. Nominalise3. Rewrite newly structured sentences

  12. Might be something like… • Eve’s representation of herself as sweet and submissive makes her seem non-threatening to the characters she plans to manipulate for self gain.Or • Eve’s sweet and submissive façade makes her seems non-threatening to the characters she plans to manipulate for self gain.

  13. Learning Goal • What are two ways you can stop yourself from simply retelling the plot?

  14. More practice! • Get out your practice paragraphs or practice essay. • Search for the verbs • Check if they are saying what happened in the film or if they are analysing. If the former, change them into nouns, rewrite that part.

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