Mythology Essay Corrections

1. Mythology Essay Corrections Miss Michel – English I

2. Overarching Issues Some problems to address

3. Essay Organization • Make sure your essay is divided into PARAGRAPHS. • Each paragraph should have one main focus or topic. • That topic should be clear in your paragraph’s TOPIC SENTENCE and CONCLUSION SENTENCE. • Many people chose not to include a conclusion paragraph, and this made your essays seem to just end abruptly.

4. Verb Tense • Make sure that you do not change verb tenses midway through your writing. • Changing verb tense from past to present or from present to past is confusing to your reader. • Consistency is key! • Example: “The King of Seriphus, Polydectes, fell in love with Perseus’ mother, Danae. He knew, though, that he can’t get a chance with her while Perseus was still around.”

5. Common “Spelling” Errors Make sure that you know your words!

6. Proper Nouns • Please make sure you spell the names of the gods and goddesses correctly. When you misspell their names in your research, it makes your work seem weak. • Most commonly misspelled names: ZEUS, HEPHAESTUS, APHRODITE

7. Their, There, and They’re • Their = possessive pronoun • “The Braves are my favorite professional baseball team. Their work ethic is so high; I’ve gone to spring training three times.” • There = a location, often an adverb • “I love my Aunt. She is one of the closest people in the world to me. Her house is always open when I need her, so I go there when I need advice.” • They’re = a contraction for “they are” • I sometimes cook for my family. When they’re tired at the end of the day, they love my lasagna.

8. Subject / Verb Agreement Does your subject match your verb in number?

9. Subject / Verb Agreement Errors “Hephaestus create a golden throne to offer as a gift to Hera.” “The story of Demeter and Persephone go like this.” “She believed that it was always better to use wisdom to settle differences, but she encourage fighting for a good cause.” “She never forgot injuries and punished all the women the Olympian god fell in love with even when they yielded or was tricked into having intimate relationships with one another.”

10. Pronoun / Antecedent Error If you have a pronoun, is it abundantly clear what the noun is that it is replacing?

11. Pronoun / Antecedent Errors • Pronoun A pronoun is a substitute for a noun. It refers to a person, place, thing, feeling, or quality but does not refer to it by its name. The pronoun in the following sample sentence is bolded. • Antecedent An antecedent is the word, phrase, or clause to which a pronoun refers, understood by the context. The antecedent in the following sample sentence is bolded.

12. Ambiguous Pronoun Reference 1) “However, before they were killed, Hermes answered the prayer of their dead mother and sent a golden ram to rescue them. Theytraveled through Europe and Asia.” 2) “Zeus’s father heard a prophecy that he was going to be killed by Perseus! 3) Since his grandfather didn’t want to die, and since he’s the king, he had Perseus shipped off to an island.” Especially when you introduce a new paragraph, be sure that the subject of your sentence is abundantly clear!

13. Sentence Fragments What’s missing?

14. Any sentence, short or long, can be a sentence fragment! The length of your sentence does not matter!

15. Suggestions for Revision: • Fragment: Theseus the Greek Athenian.Possible Revision: Theseus was the most famous Athenian. (Missing verb) • Fragment: She took on Medusa with her partner, Perseus. And killed Medusa. Possible Revision: Because she encouraged fighting for a good cause, she took on and killed Medusa with her partner, Perseus.

16. But don’t start a sentence with a conjunction! (haha) (That makes it a sentence Fragment.)

17. Run-On Sentences What do you need to fix your run-on sentences?

18. What makes a Run-On sentence? • When you combine two complete sentences with a coordinating conjunction, USE A COMMA! • Example: Flawed Sentence: “Even though Hades was the god of the underworld he wasn’t considered evil by most gods but Hades did not have a very good personality.” Corrected Sentence: “Even though Hades was the god of the underworld,(COMMA) he wasn’t considered evil by most gods,(COMMA) but Hades did not have a very good personality.”

19. Comma Splice What is holding your sentences together??

20. Sample Comma Splice Errors • “They loved Perseus very much, however, Zeus’s father heard a prophecy that he was going to get killed by Perseus!” Sample corrected sentences: “They loved Perseus very much;however, Zeus’s father heard a prophecy that he was going to get killed by Perseus!” “They loved Perseus very much, but Zeus’s father heard a prophecy that he was going to get killed by Perseus!”

21. Correction Directions Corrections due by Tuesday, October 12, 2010

22. How to do corrections: Minor Errors Major Errors (X’s) • Hand in a new, revised final draft of your essay. Highlight the changes you’ve made. • Also hand in your graded final draft so I can see how your writing has improved. • On separate paper, write the flawed sentence, the error it contains, and a corrected version of the sentence. • Major errors include S/V agreement, ambiguous pronoun, fragment, run-on, and comma splice.