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Once a mother Relinquishment and adoption from the perspective of unmarried mothers

Once a mother Relinquishment and adoption from the perspective of unmarried mothers in Tamil Nadu, India. Pien Bos. PhD 2008 (with distinction). Supervisors: Dr. Fenneke Reysoo Prof. Dr. Joke Schrijvers Funding: NWO-Wotro & WODC. Background of the research & the researcher.

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Once a mother Relinquishment and adoption from the perspective of unmarried mothers

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  1. Once a mother Relinquishment and adoption from the perspective of unmarried mothers in Tamil Nadu, India. Pien Bos PhD 2008 (with distinction) Supervisors: Dr. Fenneke Reysoo Prof. Dr. Joke Schrijvers Funding: NWO-Wotro & WODC

  2. Background of the research & the researcher • University of Utrecht: MA Pedagogic & Cultural Antropology (1995) • World-children (NGO) Adoption agency (1995-2000) • Radboud University Nijmegen PhD. (2008) ‘Once a mother’ • 2011 • Birthmothers in the Nederlands (2009 – 2011) • Unicef: supply-side of adoption in Vietnam (2011-2012) 1

  3. Adoption Triangle Relinquished child Adoption Agencies Birthmother/parents Adoptive parent(s) 3

  4. Background of the ResearchBased upon experiences while I was working for Wereldkinderen Adoption Agency (1995-2000): Reasons for relinquishment: • Financial constraints • politically incorrect • Deprivation of parental rights (NL: ‘Ontzet uit de ouderlijke macht’) (Colombia) • ± politically (in)correct • Social stigma – ‘Unmarried Mothers’ (India) • politically correct 2

  5. Tamil Nadu 3

  6. Research Objective To gain insight into the decision-making processes of unmarried mothers with regard to raising their children or relinquishing them for adoption. 4

  7. Etnography: approach & noun • Grounded theory: Glaser & Straus (1967 ‘The discovery of grounded theory’) = approach & noun • Social constructivism (epistemology) (versus positivism) The existence of parallel truths. (versus one ‘objective’ truth) - Feminist anthropology: Inter-subjectivity / Reflexive (Action oriented / Advocacy / Activistic?) • Emic perspective: description of meanings from the perspective of the informants 5

  8. Access Methods Sources • Gate-keepers: - Network • - Research visa • - 2 years fieldwork (2002-2003) • Participant Observation: - ‘ Lounge About’ (informal conversations – observations, document-analysis) • Thick description • In-depth Interviews: - Mothers, their relations & experts (social workers/ policymakers) • Document analysis: Policydocuments, law, census etc. • Focus-groupdiscussion: Membercheck & Triangulation 6

  9. Unmarried mothers? Photo: Tying the yellow rope (tāli): the ultimate wedding act. Negotiating marriage ‘The tāli makes the difference,’ my assistant Florina explains to me. ‘If a tāli is tied by the man, the woman will consider herself married to that particular man’. ‘Not like that,’ Meenaksi nuances later. ‘Any man can tie a tāli in any place. A man may tie his concubine a tāli to make her feel more comfortable and to reduce her shame but that does not make them married.’Quote: Once a mother Chapter 1 10

  10. 52 ‘Unmarried Mothers’: women without husband • 36 ‘Unmarried Mothers’ relinquished for adoption • - 7 retrospective • - 29 During decision-making process • - 6 (expecting) mothers were married • - 16 (expecting) mothers were unmarried • - 7 (expecting) mothers had a negotiable marital status • 16 ‘Unmarried Mothers’ did not relinquish • All retrospective • - 9 unmarried • - 7 once married (single parents: seperated/divorced) 11

  11. Relinquishment: The cultural meaning of motherhood Selvi, twenty years after signing the surrender-deed: ‘It is the same blood running in the two of us. I am sure that he still has the scent of Madras on him.’ Quote: Once a mother Chapter 2 • Relinquishing the care for her child, since motherhood is not transferable • The legal reality does not match with the personal experiences of mothers (a ‘paperwork-construction’) 13

  12. Decisive factors • - Guilt & Loyalty towards family. • Unmarried mother about her father: • ‘[He said] “I gave you all the freedom and now you have put me in shame (talaikuṉivu = ‘I lost my face’). How can I answer the questions? I can not face anybody. I did not expect you to do like this. I educated you..” He said this to me and started crying.(..)’ • Reciprocity: Baby as a gift. • Role of institutions: • Dominant middel-class discourses in institutions. • Financial incentives • Double role • Inadequate and directive counseling 14

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