We understand conflict.

1. We understand conflict. PC Comments: Not quite sure what you are saying here, you need to couch it in the terms set out in the brief. Slide looks quite messy, and I don't know what the pictures are supposed to be saying. You haven't grabbed my attention.

2. In fact, most of our spectator sports are just complicated metaphors for conflict. It’s a large part of why we watch sports. PC Comments: This is better. I can see the beginning of an argument. The visuals and the copy work together. It's simple and clear and makes me want to keep reading.

3. MMA stages conflict for us in a very naked, direct way. This nakedness, this purity, is compelling. That’s why we have a hardcore fan base, and that’s why it’s hard to turn away from watching a fight. But for most people, it’s taboo, a guilty pleasure, almost shameful. It’s almost pornographic. The number one barrier to MMA gaining a larger audience is the bad rep it has - people think it’s nothing more than brutal, exhibitionistic violence. PC Comments: You've done your research. This is a good summary of both the sport and the issues facing the sports. Slide is cluttered. Only the clarity of thought keeps me reading.

4. There’s an obvious parallel here in our relationship with on-screen sex. It’s not okay to watch D-cup Vixen Nymphos vol. 54, but it is okay to watch Eyes Wide Shut. In the end, it’s hard to say which contains more graphic sex. Setting the sex within a story makes it both permissible and compelling. PC Comments: Okay. This could be interesting. But at this stage you're not convincing me. I think porn and conventional cinema are delivering different benefits, aren't they? But, I suppose I'm interested to see where you take this...

5. To make MMA permissible to a wider audience, we need to help it make the same kind of switch. We need to bring out the story behind the fighting. We need to go from two people fighting in a cage to two people showing us what sportsmanship really is, two faces of dedication and toughness, two athletes dancing, two people connecting on a level we admire but cannot experience ourselves. PC Comments: Interesting thought, but I’m not sure why this is unique to MMA, why only MMA can offer this to consumers. And how this will usurp one of the big 5 sports in the US. I'm not sure that the story behind the 2 competitors is what makes an MMA fight interesting to me. But I do want to hear more - maybe I'm wrong. Again slide is dull - but you are getting your point across.

6. fairnessathleticismcouragereal aggressionspiritequalityfight joy dedicationgrace connection respect skill sportsmanship raw honesty everyonediscipline intelligence Fortunately, there’s already a story in the practice and culture of MMA. We just need to bring it out for a wider audience. PC Comments: This feels like a different argument to me. Are you telling the story of the fighters? Or, the story of MMA, and what it stands for? That aside, I’m still interested to see where you take this.

7. The route to MMA becoming a mass-appeal spectator sport looks like this: Make the fighters the story Deliver the action you promise Create a fan culture Be the last honest sport Put the sport in front of people, let them know why they should watch PC Comments: I like the clarity of a set of objectives. I look forward to reading how you intend to do this.

8. Wanted to play soccer but didn’t have the endurance. Studied psychology, and worries about long term immersion in an aggressive culture, but just can’t give up the sport. 1. Make the fighters the story The recent surge in the sport’s popularity has been driven by the reality show, The Ultimate Fighter. The UK needs one too. Get fighters to really talk - it’s intriguing to hear them talk the way Alexis does. Why do they fight? How did they get here? A fight is two people connecting. Show us diversity, show us a high school dropout and a PhD entering the ring, saluting each other, and fighting fair. Show us the differences outside the ring and how this sport levels them in the ring. Include women. Our story is partly about how conflict is universal. Could we showcase the toughness of women in a way the major women’s sports like soccer and basketball don’t? PC Comments: I worry the story thing could be a red herring - you still haven't told me why it help us reach our objective. Other saying that it's the difference between porn and Hollywood films, or something. That’s not enough of an insight. Lot of words here. You have to find a way of packaging these thoughts more interestingly and precisley. Fought every day as a kid. Fighting to save enough to get married. Will go out to dinner with his opponent after the match.

9. 2. Deliver the action you promised. MMA is becoming monotonous. Too often matches degenerate into savage pounding or straight athletic contests because standard techniques are emerging. Make this a team sport, and make it international - imagine Tokyo fighting Rio, or London fighting New York. By creating teams, you automatically, organically create team styles, giving the fights a much needed shot of variety and spectacle. Can we create fan action? Think football derby, team rivalries… PC Comments: This is dangerous. If you're saying that the sport is boring and does not deliver what consumers expect, then that sounds like an interesting bigger idea (which would need more thought). Though I would add that the most recent Pride Competition was anything but monotonous. Team promotions have been done before, and there seems something incoherent about it, but I like the fact that you're thinking beyond the conventional – that’s important. Presume the image has been lost from the page.

10. 3. Create a fan culture It’s no accident that the most popular spectator sports are generally team sports. People identify with teams much more strongly than with individuals, and all the more so in a sport like this, where careers can be very short. Making this a team sport, creating that opportunity for being part of a group, makes it easier to be a fan. Do we need to have a league? Something for fans to check in the papers every Sunday? Educate your audience - a knowledgeable fan is a more appreciative one. PC Comments: Too many words. I wish you had expanded on the education thought you mention at the end.

11. 4. Be the last honest sport Emphasize that the fighters are just people. Before fighting, they used to be in college, or IT, or something. They do not make 8 figure salaries and they aren’t superstars. They’re just people who work very hard at what they do. No holds barred = a level playing field. Be tougher on doping, fouling, and corruption than anyone else. What if the MMA league had the most level pay structure in professional sport? What if it provided every fighter full pension, and the best health cover money can buy? Set MMA up as the guardian of sporting spirit and fair competition, in opposition to the cynical, unreal circus which surrounds the main spectator sports. PC Comments: I like the sentiment of this, but am not sure how likely it is to help make MMA a top 5 sport. Plus the sport is rife with drug abuse at the moment. Not sure how likely a flat pay structure is, and again not clear how this helps us meet our objective. There is something here though. Honesty feels like it could have been an interesting area, again good that you mention it, but I’d have liked to have heard more.

12. 5. Put the sport in front of people, tell them why they should watch Distribute better. Distribution is fine in the US, on prime time Spike TV, but lags badly in the UK. Can we get highlights on a sports channel to help correct gender imbalance? Global distribution also needs to be considered, since you’re looking at an international league. This plan is rife with PR opportunities, but the stance taken here can support a louder, prouder communications platform too. PR to announce the changes, combined with branding ads to raise awareness and celebrate the sport. Pick on other sports when appropriate. Baseball strike? Tour de France winner on steroids? None of that here. Who are your sponsors? Perhaps the only sponsors you want are those with a direct connection to sport. It’s not about making this family friendly. It’s about being forthright and celebrating the story behind the sport. PC Comments: Demand is the bigger problem, there is plenty of distribution, even in the UK. Reads like more of wish list as opposed to a strategy for achieving the objective. Not a great final slide. Feels a bit flat. Not reminder. No killer thought. Nothing that grabs me and makes me feel like I absolutely need this kind of thinking on my business. That being said there was some clear thinking in there, and I feel like you tried to be original.