THE PLACE of HONOR • Allows Trust • Allows Intimacy • Allows Empowerment

1. THE PLACE of HONOR • Allows Trust • Allows Intimacy • Allows Empowerment

2. HONOR … • Respects the Host’s right to self-govern. • Respects the Host’s right to set the boundaries. • Respects the Host’s right to grant you a place at his table—or not.

3. 4 LEVELS OF RELATIONSHIPS 1 — Acquaintance (no influence) 2 — Casual (no influence) 3 — Close (covenant influence) 4 — Intimate (vulnerable influence)

4. PRACTICING SKILLS of HONOR Requires… • Understanding Covenant • Understanding Intimacy • Understanding Boundaries

5. COVENANT DEFINED: I allow you a place of honor in my life to influence my decisions, and you also allow me to influence you.

6. COVENANT’S ESSENCE: I am willing to lay down my life for you and you also for me in order to protect the relationship.

7. INTIMACY DEFINED: I allow you a place of honor in my life to see my flaws and weaknesses and you allow me the same place of honor.

8. INTIMACY’S ESSENCE: I feel safe, accepted, and not judged or condemned by you when my faults are shared and exposed.

9. INTIMACY’S ESSENCE: You have no agenda for my self-improvement. And you experience the same safe place of vulnerability with me.

10. LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION: 1 — Cliché What’s up? How’s it going? 2 — Facts Reporting or acknowledging things.

11. LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION: 3 — Thoughts problem level: ideas/opinions shared. 4 — Feelings vulnerable level: Here is my heart on how this situation makes me feel.

12. LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION: 5 — Needs (response level) How you behave towards me in my vulnerability reveals how much you value or want to protect our relationship.

13. 5 LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION: 1 — Cliché 2 — Facts 3 — Thoughts (problem level) 4 — Feelings (vulnerable level) 5 — Needs (response level) How you behave towards me in my vulnerability reveals how much you value or want to protect our relationship.

14. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To keep in what I want to keep in.

15. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To keep in what I want to keep in. • To keep out what I want to keep out.

16. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES”… • To keep in what I want to keep in. • To keep out what I want to keep out. • To protect the priorities of my life.

17. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

18. +++ Paul DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

19. +++ Paul ++Barnabas DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

20. +++ Paul ++ Barnabas +Timothy DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

21. +++ Paul ++ Barnabas + Timothy 0People DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

22. +++ Paul ++ Barnabas + Timothy 0 People EGRs DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships

23. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” Bedroom Bedroom Living Room Dining Room Shared Bathroom The Bedroom PORCH Foyer Shared Bathroom Bath Room Kitchen Study Bathroom Bedroom Bedroom Pantry

24. The Bedroom

25. Bed The Bedroom Bedrooms

26. Bed Bed The Bedroom The Bedroom Bedrooms Bedrooms Kitchen

27. Bed Bed The Bedroom The Bedroom Bedrooms Bedrooms Kitchen Kitchen Dining Room

28. Bed Bed The Bedroom The Bedroom Bedrooms Bedrooms Kitchen Kitchen Dining Room Dining Roo Living Room

29. Bed Bed The Bedroom The Bedroom Bedrooms Bedrooms Kitchen Kitchen Dining Room Dining Room Living Room Living Foyer

30. Porch Porch Bed Bed The Bedroom The Bedroom Porch Porch Bedrooms Bedrooms Kitchen Kitchen Dining Room Dining Room Porch Porch Living Room Living Room Foyer Foyer

38. O. J.

39. Harry Reid O. J.

40. DEFINING “BOUNDARIES” • To keep in what I want to keep in. • To keep out what I want to keep out. • To protect the priorities of my life: - Time - Energy - Resources - Relationships