Emotional Intelligence

1. Emotional Intelligence Unlock the Mystery of Success

2. What is Emotional Intelligence (EI)? • Emotional intelligence is recognizing your emotional triggers and knowing when and how to use them in a way that enables you to not only deal with these stressorsobjectively, but to also develop strong connections with your co-workers.

3. What does EI Look Like? • Instructions: Working with your group, describe the difference between someone with a high level of emotional intelligence and someone with a lower level of emotional intelligence.

4. Agree on Definition – BUT - • While the concept of EI (the knowledge of, and ability, to influence emotions of others, as well as yourself) – had been decided in the research, psychology and learning world, there is debate as to what the precise nature of Emotional Intelligence is. What is the real nature of EI?

5. Types of EI Models • The Ability Model • Trait Based Model • Bar-on Model • Genos Model • Mixed Model

6. The Mixed Model –Daniel Goleman • While not without its critics, The Mixed Model instructs us to focus on our capabilities that are not innate, but those that can be learned and developed to achieve new levels of performance. • self-awareness • self-regulation • social scale • empathy • motivation

7. Criticism of Mixed Model • Harder to measure • Suggest self-reporting • “Pop” Psychology? • Broader scope – • Emotion • Intelligence

8. Scientific Support for Model • Stems from SEL (Social and Emotional Learning) • SEL is the basis for the “essentials of living” • How I act when I feel (small child) • How others feel when I act (older child) • How can I resolve conflicts (high school) • Link to SEL and academic accomplishment • University research has moved concept to workplace • Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations (CREIO) • Big companies part of consortium

9. Psychology Behind EI A study conducted at the Virginia Commonwealth University School of Business found that emotional intelligence is a strong predictor of job performance.

10. Not Accounting for Stressors

11. Best Practices We Can All Use • While our natural characteristics will help determine potential, there are “best practices” which we can all adhere to. • There is no real mystery to becoming an “emotionally intelligent” leader.

12. Self-Awareness Interpreted as recognizing one's own emotions, strengths and weaknesses, goals, motivations, and values. This element of the Mixed Model also includes the ability to recognize one's impact on others, and using a certain level of intuition to guide their decisions regarding how they alter the emotions of others. Source: Universalclass.com

13. Emotions I feel when I see the following images:

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18. Self-Regulation This involves recognizing one's own negative or disruptive emotions and impulses and controlling or redirecting them to a productive or positive purpose or feeling. This element also includes the individual's capacity to adapt to changing circumstances. Source: Universalclass.com

19. Recognize Your Physical Cues • Increased heart rate • Butterflies • Flushed skin • Tense muscles • Sweating • Voice rising, getting louder

20. Prevent Emotional Hijacking An emotional hijacking may hinder you from choosing an effective response, action, or decision. To prevent this, you must take some time to recognize the cues that your emotions are taking over. • Take a deep breath. • Silently count to ten. An oldie, but goodie! • Train yourself to use a gesture to remind yourself to pause and breathe. For example, when you feel your emotions rising, tap your leg. • Close your eyes and visualize a scene that is pleasant and calming to you.

21. Words Matter – Self Regulation • You might think it, but what could you say instead that is positive? • That’s a dumb idea. • You are an idiot. • You can’t really believe that would work.

22. Social Scale This construct simply utilizes the first two elements in such a way as to manage relationships with those around you to move people in the direction you want them to go. In simple terms, this might include a manager finding a new way to motivate an employee or someone communicating their positive attributes on a first date to secure a second date. Source: Universalclass.com

23. Activity The “Eyes” Have It A big part of social competence if the ability to make appropriate eye contact. This exercise helps delegates to understand and appreciate the power of eye contact and how it can affect emotional connection and emotional states.

26. Debrief • How did participants feel? • What did the observers observe? • What preconditions surround making eye contact?

28. Empathy Though sometimes confused with sympathy, empathy is actually an entirely different process. In sympathy, one typically feels sorry or badly regarding a challenge or problem another person is having. When a person practices empathy, they are able to personally identify with the challenges of another, and to consider the feelings of others when making decisions. Empathy often serves pragmatic and emotional purposes. Source: Universalclass.com

30. Empathy Statements • “I am so frustrated that we can’t get this done today.” • “You don’t understand how hard I’ve worked on this project.” • “I don’t understand why I have to fix someone else’s mistake.”

31. Motivation In the Mixed Model of Emotional Intelligence, it is theorized that a person with a high EQ will be able to successfully motivate themselves to achieve their goals. Essentially, this accounts not only for goals with pragmatic results, (such as a job promotion), but also achievement for the sake of achievement. The Mixed Model requires an individual with high Emotional Intelligence to seek success for no purpose other than because it is success. Source: Universalclass.com

32. Top 10 List • Instructions: List ten things you have achieved at work or outside of work. Write down the first ten things that come to mind. If you list more, that’s great!

33. Change the Tapes in Your Head • According to Val Kinjerski, PhD, we have 65,000 thoughts a day and 65 percent of them are negative. You can increase your self-confidence by minimizing negative thoughts (2011). • Think positive and in the present tense – • I’m not shy • I’m going to try to be confident • Focus on what you can do, not what you can’t

34. What Else can You Do? • What other techniques can you use to develop the five areas of EI demonstrated by the Mixed Model? • Self-Awareness • Self-Regulation • Social Scale • Empathy • Motivation

36. Bibliography • Emotional Intelligence: The Mixed Model – Universalclass.com • Goleman, Daniel. Working with Emotional Intelligence. New York: Bantam Books, 1998 • HRDQ. Emotional Intelligence: A Scientifically Proven Method for Developing the Skills of Success, King of Prussia, PA: HRDQ, 2013 • Lynn, Adele B. “The Emotional Intelligence Activity Book.” 2002 HRD Press, New York, NY.