Presented by Woodman & Dawson Jr.

1. Presented by Woodman & Dawson Jr.

2. Families In America Then and Now

3. Andrew has been writing for 30 years about the American Family. His book “ The Marriage Go Round” explains the difference between family life in the US and other Western Countries. No other countries have marriage becoming a social and political battlefield like the United States. Nowhere else is a government spending money to promoting marriage than the United States. The debate about same sex marriage exist in the United States like nowhere else in the Western countries. Through his research he explains why the United States has one of the highest rates of marriage and divorce. AndrewJ. Cherlin

4. American women become parents at an earlier age and are much more likely to spend time as single parents in their teens or twenties than are women in Western Europe. By the age 30, 1/3 of American women spent time as single parent mothers. In European countries such as France, Sweden, and the western part of Germany the comparable percentages were half as large or less. But children born to single parents in the US are also more likely to experience a parents new partner moving into the household than in some other countries, including France, Sweden, and Germany. How American Family Life is Different

5. The percentage of children seeing their mothers change their partner 3 times or more by the age of 15 is 2%. Every other country except in Sweden it is 3% and in the U.S. it is 8%. By age 30, 1/3 of American women spent time as single mothers. The percentage of children seeing their mothers change their partner twice, again the U.S. leads with 21% compare to Sweden 16%,11% in Canada and 8% in France. Children have more difficulties with single parents than a 2 parent stable home; they have more behavioral problems, start having sexual intercourse at a younger age, having children out of wedlock. The Impact

6. One major difference is that the U.S. contradictories marriage and individualism; unified a set of values & expectations. Cultural models are habits, thoughts, interpreting everyday life & then there might be more than one culture; Americans draw upon both marriage & individualism models. The cultural model of individualism holds the self-development and personal satisfaction as the major ingredients for an intimate partnership; your partner must provide you with the opportunity to develop your sense of self. The rise of cohabitation reflects the growing influence of the cultural model of individualism on personal and family life; the partnership is solely holding together by a voluntary commitment of the partners. Contradictions in American Culture

7. In the U.S. religion & law are two principles that greatly influences how people build their family lives; Religion provides moral principles and Law provides principles about what is permissible rights and obligations that family members have. From an international perspective the power of American religion is remarkable; no other Western countries religious practice is so critical in determining people beliefs. American religious faiths continue to hold marriage in high standard since the colonial era. Another component that Americans have than any other Western countries is “family policy” where American government support social program such as the Welfare program, other countries families have to rely on the labor market. Support from Religion and Law

8. In 1857, a New England woman Abby Sage, married Daniel McFarland a well educated man of law who lied to her about his thriving law practice and Abby became displeased and unhappy in the marriage. McFarland- unspeakably cruel, fierce temper, and most of the time was intoxicated. These were Abby's claims about Daniel. Abby began to socialize with radical group figures who were journalist with the New York Tribune. One was a woman who encouraged her to divorce Daniel and one was a man named Albert Richardson After 10 years from 1857 to 1867 Abby and Daniel moved into a boarding house and so did Richardson. Daniel seen his wife standing at the door of Richardson and she stated that Daniel tormented and abused her throughout the night and she told Daniel she was leaving him. Richardson then told Abby he wanted her if she became divorced expressing his interest. Her husband killed Richardson. McFarland was on trial for murder and won his case because of an unwritten law that if a husband caught his wife in an act of adultery he could kill the man involved. Daniel did not want a divorce, but his wife did. A Story of Historical Origins of the American Pattern, 1650 to 1900

9. The marriage based family that consisted of a husband, wife, and children with the husband designated as head of household was known as a society within itself. Parents were required by law to teach their children and servants to read scripture. Why was this done? Because there were no schools at the time, family was the school. Marriage and family was so essential that if a child or children lost their parents they would be taken in by another family not an orphanage. Marriage was in fact the foundation of a civil society a civil status ordained by God. Marriage and Divorce from the Colonial Era to 1800

10. In 1753 the church of England and in 1850 informal marriage was common in England among the poor because they were not married in a church. Owners could and did disregard bonds of kinship by selling slaves or by having sex with the females without regard to family ties. Jumping the broom was adopted from whites as self-marriage brought over from Europe. Child bearing could occur before marriage, but they were expected to marry. But the marriage could be cancelled if there were no children born to preserve the lineage. Slavery forced African Americans to have children out of wedlock to preserve the lineage. Recognized Self Marriage

11. Is birth control information obscene? According to Anthony Comstock a reformer from New York, birth control undermined morality by separating sex from child bearing. Sexual intercourse was being used to have sex without child bearing and encouraged married people to have sex outside of marriage. Congress passed the Comstock Act in 1873 outlawing the use of mail to send any information out about birth control. This re-enforced that marriage was the proper place for sexual relations rather than to experience intimacy or pleasure. Another view of low birth rate stemmed from the idea that if a married couple hated each other they would stop having sex and not produce any children, so divorce was given so that they could re-marry and start having sex again to have children. Marriage Divorce and Birth Control 1800s

12. The link between romantic love and marriage was defined as compassionate. Should you be romantically attracted to the person you want to marry? Being in love was defined as feeling an intense emotional pull between two persons vs. looking for a spouse that was dependable, and had a pleasing disposition. Romantic love was risky and began to fade out quickly. In a marriage people relied heavily on being dependent upon their spouses to supply their needs financially because there were no welfare programs or social security. The Rise of The Compassionate Marriage 1900 to 1960

13. A key cultural difference between the US and Western Europe developed in the 1950s and the difference was family life and religious vitality. Church membership increased in the US from 1850 to 1950 from 34% to 59 % . But in Europe it was just the opposite, Britain had a constant decline in church attendance from 1860 to 1950 with 23% attending on a monthly basis. The decline was an example of secularization defined as the decline of religious ideas and practices in social and personal life due to the rise of modernization in the country. A Spiritual Dwelling

14. During the 70s and 80s the term togetherness changed from the 50s to the word separateness were wives were encouraged to think about their own personal needs and space within the marriage. During this period and new style of marriage was emerging to individualize within the marriage and change to more flexible roles self-development began to overrule oneness, where the two became one in a marriage. Divorce was stabilized during the 50s, but began to rise again during the 60s, and reached an all time high in the 80s at a 50% chance of ending in divorce. In the Western nations England, France, and Germany adopted the law but there was a waiting period of 3 to 6 years before a divorce was granted. But in the US the waiting period was 1 year. The Individualized Marriage and Expressive Divorce, 1960 to 2000

15. In the early 2000s the male breadwinner was steadily declining and births out of marriage were on the rise. Gays and lesbians were making attempts to legalize same sex marriage, and heterosexual marriage was being presented and encouraged to the young adults. No other efforts of these sorts were being presented anywhere in the entire world. The debate for same sex marriage grew intensely and the idea of individualism within the marriage continues to flourish. Cohabiting relationships became more common. The American Way of Marriage Declining

16. Marriage is still recognized as a relationship between a man and woman. The word partner cannot be recognized as the word spouse. A spouse has visitation rights at hospitals, could authorize treatments, can make funeral arrangements, and carry you on their insurance. Therefore the fight continues with becoming married by gay and lesbian partners so that they can legally obtain the right to the word spouse. Who Owns Marriage? Spouse or Partner 1980

17. Is openness to new experience the essence of American personality? Mobility is made easier if community bond are light” therefore divorce and remarriage can be made easier. Mobility has been greater in America than in Europe. Research shows that American men are more likely to move from place to place, and job to job to better themselves than the British men. 2/3 of American men would change their county or state of dwelling over a thirty year period vs. the British at 1/4 over the same time period. The M Factor

18. The division in social equality is the difference in the standard of living and economic opportunity in America and is much more pronounced in the US than in Western countries. the gap between high and low income families is far greater in the United States than in Western countries. Western countries government tax the wealthy more and provide more assistance to low and moderate income families. What’s In Common? from the poorest to the richest young adults seek companionship, emotional satisfaction, and self-development through marriage. African Americans, Hispanics, and Whites all rate the emotional benefits of marriage highly. Blue Collar Blues/White Collar Weddings

19. Americans have a strength that is attached to marriage. Throughout most of our American history marriage was viewed in moral terms “Christian moral terms”. In the 20th century moral has taken a back seat to politics and legal affairs by social statements made about marriage and its decline. But the truth is the growth of single families, poverty, and welfare dependency is where the benefits of marriage has depleted. Slow down and make sure you get what you need from a marriage and not just what you want it to be. Slow Down