Positive Parenting

2. Positive Parenting 0 – 7 years

4. Health Commission of Australiahas found in 2004: • 56 children under 4 on anti‐depressants • 728 children aged between 5‐9 on anti‐depressants • 4,689 aged between 10‐14 on anti‐depressants • Nationally prescriptions for people under 19 topped more than 250,000

5. Some Facts for Kids • 3 % of all 3 year olds have severe tantrums • 10 % of all parents of children 2-5 years ask for help with behavior problems • Anti-social behavior accounts for 30-40% of referrals to child mental health services

6. What has disappeared? • Gentle touch and games • Fairy tales • Being “present” not just in the room • Playing real hands on games • Games in the car • Human conversation with real people • Simple toys that don’t cost money • Less parent direction

7. Terrifying Truth • I am the decisive element in the life of a child. • I create so many souls like me. • I have tremendous power to make a child’s life joyous or miserable. • I can be an agent of change. • Pakistan can become a better or worse place because of me. • My Mission Correlates with that of the PROPHETS.

8. What tends to be your goals or desires in parenting? • Goals: _____________________ • Desires: ____________________

9. What are your greatest struggles in parenting?! Answers: • ___________________________ • ___________________________

10. يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ قُوٓاْ أَنفُسَكُمۡ وَأَهۡلِيكُمۡ نَارً۬ا At-Tahreem, 6

11. How important do you think it is to teach your children character building? (Pre-test)

12. How do you teach your children character building? – Pre-test

13. How often do you talk about character?

14. Social And Emotional Building Blocks

15. Longer term consequences of not intervening early • Poor relationships with others • Low resilience • Poor qualifications and work history • Low frustration tolerance • Easily upset and see “threat” everywhere • Greater involvement in antisocial behaviour and drug misuse • Families who feel let down, upset, angry or powerless.

16. 10 Characteristics of Great Parents • Mindful parent (vision for their children) • Authoritative parenting style • Understand child temperament • Involved in child’s life • Think Win-Win with their children (rules) • Co-parent well • Consistent • Avoid harsh discipline • Explain decisions • Respect

17. Traits of Authoritative Parents • Clear limits and boundaries • Be firm but flexible • Good communication • Do many fun things together • Let child be an individual

18. Principles of Discipline • Have a few clear rules • Speak simply • Be “blasé” • Be the boss • Be warmly involved • Give only one warning • Don’t get into power struggles • Set expectations and outcomes prior to events/challenges

19. Positive Parenting • Parent with a plan • Parent in freedom, not fear • Parent with affection, but not softness • Parent with authority, but not coercion • Parent by being an awesome person

20. There is a mass of research to demonstrate that the more touch a child gets in childhood, the calmer and less fearful he is likely to be in adulthood....

21. Link child to Allah Ta’ala وَإِذۡ قَالَ لُقۡمَـٰنُ لِٱبۡنِهِۦ وَهُوَ يَعِظُهُ ۥ يَـٰبُنَىَّ لَا تُشۡرِكۡ بِٱللَّهِ‌ۖ إِنَّ ٱلشِّرۡكَ لَظُلۡمٌ عَظِيمٌ۬ • Raise according to Quran and Sunnah • Be right role model • Provide Islamic environment • Paint right picture of Allah Ta’ala • Stories of Rasulillah (SAW) and Sahabah • Ultimate Authority is Allah Ta’ala

22. Early Childhood

23. Activity • In groups of three or four prepare a case study or story that you faced and now fit it with the parenting style.

24. Bachey Jannat key phool!