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How can I develop a mature prose style?. Avoid contractions. it’s that’s could’ve . Avoid cliches. “...ray of hope...” “...never give up...” “...life throws curveballs...” “...light at the end of the tunnel…” “...beat down…”. Avoid qualitative statements.
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Avoid contractions it’s that’s could’ve
Avoid cliches “...ray of hope...” “...never give up...” “...life throws curveballs...” “...light at the end of the tunnel…” “...beat down…”
Avoid qualitative statements “Rowlandson does a good job…” “The imagery is good.” “This is a great story…” “I liked this story very much.” “This is a good narrative…”
Revise for mature prose style: • “The uncertainty of life would be the theme of the narrative.” • “Rowlandson makes the reader feel her pain, her hope, and her courage through her writing.” • “The tone of the text is hopeful.”
Possible revisions • The uncertainty of life conspicuously pervades the narrative as a theme throughout Rowlandson’s struggles. • The image of a woman, dirty, disheveled, wounded, and mourning, unfolding a Bible in the midst of an Indian camp, creates pathos as we feel her pain, her hope, and her courage. • Toward the end of the narrative, Rowlandson takes on a hopeful tone.
Revise statement of purpose “All three entries had the same purpose. The are all to inform the reader about something.” “The reason is because…” should be “The reason is that…” (a noun clause is needed here).
Additional Tips “The author feels…” We do not know how the author feels, but we can infer the author’s tone based on diction and other language devices. “...to help the reader understand…” Really? Be specific. “Using DIDLS helps the reader understand the text.” Do NOT name your analysis tool.