Teaching Students to Revise

1. Teaching Students to Revise Susan Lenski sjlenski@pdx.edu

2. Goals • 1. To examine how writers revise • 2. To consider the content of revision • 3. To learn ways to have students revise • 4. To discuss classroom routines and programs that foster revision

3. What does it mean to revise? • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du0ezSbvkdY

4. Robert Frost I have never been good at revising. I always thought I made things worse by recasting and retouching. I never knew what was meant by choice of words. It was one word or none.

5. Virginia Woolf As for my next book, I am going to hold myself from writing it till I have it impending in me: grown heavy in my mind like a ripe pear; pendant, gravid, asking to be cut or it will fall.

6. Anthony Trollope By reading what he has last written, just before he recommences his task, the writer will catch te tone and spirit of what he is then saying, and will avoid the fault of seeming to be unlike himself.

7. About Rex Stout …several times a year a scenario was repeated that started with my father moving through the house and puttering in the gardens without really hearing what anyone said to him. He’d become vague and distracted…Then, when he began his actual writing, Dad would disappear into his study precisely at noon and reappear for dinner promptly at six-thirty. … This would go on for a couple of weeks…my father never rewrote anything and his books were published exactly as he first set the words down…

8. Revision: Degrees of formality • Revision depends of audience and purposes. • Students are experts at code-switching. • Teach formal writing (for state tests) and writing that is less formal • Encourage students to make writing sing!

9. As a teacher, would you ….? The denizens of the valley of staff were astonished by the narcissism that seemed to have infused their candidate. Distraught and dispirited, too. But for a long time, they continued slaving in the service of the illusion at the core of Edwards’s political appeal: that he remained the same humble, sunny, aw-shucks, son of a mill worker he’d always been. The cognitive dissonance was enormous, sure, but they were used to that. Because for years they’d been living with an even bigger lie—the lie of Saint Elizabeth. From Game Change, 2010, p. 126

10. How to revise at the… • Overall paper • Paragraph level • Sentence level (including word choice)

11. Revise this!

13. Ideas and Content: 4 The writing in this essay is clear and focused. The reader can easily understand the main ideas. Support is present, although it may be limited or rather general. In the introduction, the writer says that Joe “has done great things and helped many people,” but the paper never addresses anything other than the coach’s help to the writer. There is limited support, although the writer does include some specific examples of the types of skills the coach helped develop in him.

14. Organization: 4 The organization is clear and coherent. Order and structure are present, but may seem formulaic. The paper has a recognizable beginning that is not particularly inviting: “Joe Perry deserves an award for being helpful.” The conclusion lacks subtlety: “If an award is ever given to anybody it should be Joe Perry for helping people on the football team get better, and for being a team player.” The concept of being a team player is never really addressed in the paper.

15. Voice: 4 A voice is present. The writer demonstrates commitment to the topic, and there is a sense of “writing to be read.” The writing lacks the liveliness and/or originality needed to score higher in the trait of Voice.

16. Word Choice: 4 For the most part, words effectively convey the intended message. The writing is characterized by words that work but do not particularly energize the writing. Words are used correctly, but the overall use of words lacks the accurate, specific, striking qualities necessary to earn a higher score.

17. Sentence Fluency: 4 The writing demonstrates strong control over simple sentence structures, but variable control over more complex sentences. The writing has a natural sound (“After about two weeks I caught the ball perfectly, ran it well, and even threw some good passes.”) and the reader can move easily through the piece. The overall flow of the paper is not strong enough to earn a score of a 5, and generally, the sentences do not appear to be carefully crafted.

18. Conventions: 4 The writing demonstrates control of standard writing conventions (e.g., punctuation, spelling, capitalization, grammar and usage). There is generally correct end-of-sentence punctuation; internal punctuation may sometimes be incorrect. Generally, the writing has no major flaws, but the level of attempt is not high enough to earn a score of a 5.