Maintenance of Relationships

1. Maintenance of Relationships Adapted from Simon Knight (2009)

2. Game… • You have £10 to split with someone (me) • You have to make an offer to me for how to split that money (e.g. 50/50) • If I accept the offer, it’s split as you suggest, if I reject the offer neither of us receives any of the money. What do you offer? • A) £5 B) £4 C) £3 D) £2

3. The ultimatum game • Economically, you should have selected D, £2. This is because you should want to maximise your money, and I should accept any offer from you (because any money is free money as far as I’m concerned). • Most people offer about 50/50. Most respondents (me) reject offers under 25%.

4. So what? • Psychologists are interested in games like this because: • They’re easy to study (simple) • They tell us something about how people make economic decisions • Some of this can be applied to decisions which don’t involve money, but might involve services, or social-goods (e.g. ‘a good ear’) – or even relationships

5. Investments… • When psychologists look at how people behave, they’re interested in investments – the things people have put in to a relationship/belief/situation, such as time, effort, money, etc. which would be lost if the relationship/belief/situation were damaged.

6. Relationships • So how might this apply to relationships? • Some possibilities • Interest in what partners ‘put in’ (investments made) • Interest in what partners take out • Interest in whether partners are trying to get more more more, or to keep things equal/fair

7. By the End of this topic • I want you to be able to outline (AO1), and critique (AO2) two theories of the maintenance of relationships. You should be able to give at least one criticism relating to the issues & debates section and some criticisms of research methods used (AO3)

8. Ultimatum game again • Economic theory says we should always make small offers (to keep as much for ourselves as possible), • and if we’re the respondent, accept any offer (because any money is free money) and try to get as much money as possible… • can we apply this to relationships?

9. Can I help you? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoptLoEj_tk

10. I want more • Bart seems to contribute little to the family; even when he is involved he’s very demanding. • Yet he takes large rewards from the family (support, food, gifts, etc.) He might like to keep relationships like this going) but his partner (mum) might not… • His investments are low, whilst hers is high

11. Task 1 • Part 1 of the worksheet (p1 & 2) You’ll need the dog book – pages 44-45

12. Some answers! Comparison level = • a standard against which all our relationships are judged • What we want from our relationships • The best relationship we ever had

13. Comparison level = a result of… • Our experiences in other relationships • Our ideal relationship – what we think all relationships should be like • Our experiences in other relationships and our general view of what we might expect from this particular exchange.

14. According to Marelich et al (2008) What do men use to gain sex? • Flowers and chocolates • Lies • Social company What might be the cost of this? • Money • Sadness • Guilt & lack of trust

15. more more more ultimatum game • Classically the ultimatum game suggests people should go for more more more (as ‘social exchange theory’ suggests in relationships) • However, in fact they seem to be quite fair, going for 50/50 splits, with responders rejecting unfair offers. • What might this mean for relationships? (think about economics)

16. Equity theory • Equity theory suggests people want the investments each partner makes to be of similar amounts • These amounts don’t have to be of the same kind – i.e. someone might contribute money, someone else good company. • Equity is about fairness

17. I give you….and all I get is… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0V9TRWq0G0

18. They kiss later in the episode. But what is Ross upset about in this clip? Ross thinks it’s unfair given how close they are (how much investment they’ve put in) that he’s emotional about her leaving, and doesn’t think she is… He perceives an inequity

19. Worksheets (pages 3 & 4) • You’ll need pages 44 & 45 of the dog book again (bottom half)

20. Answers (sort of) • Jill pays the bills & provides an emotional bedrock for Jasper who contributes little. Jill will feel: • Equity • Inequity • profitable

21. van Yperen and Buunk (1990) One reason they used their methodology was: • They knew loads of married people so it was easy to get participants • This methodology is really reliable • This methodology gives us lots of rich data rather than just a snapshot – it’s therefore more valid • This methodology gives us lots of rich data rather than just a snapshot – however it has problems with validity.

22. Read articles • Think about how it might apply to rewards/costs, what thing causes the reward/cost and how we (as psychologists) might be interested in that • Each group to feedback to the class at the end so have something to say!

23. Plan! • You have 10 minutes to plan: • Discuss two theories relating to the maintenance of relationships (25 marks) • social exchange outline (AO1) then support (evidence to support…) then criticism (evidence criticising…) AO2/3 • Leads in to social equity outline (AO1) then support & criticism (AO2/3)

24. Homework • Discuss one or more theories relating to the maintenance of relationships (25 marks) • I’d like you to discuss both theories

25. What Women Want At the start of the film Gibson’s character does nothing in relationships except take, he offers nothing back in return. He’s quite happy with this (and might like to keep relationships like this going) but his partner’s might not be… His investments are low, whilst theirs might be high 25

26. WORKSHEET DOCUMENT