Elements of Voice

Elements of Voice

Elements of Voice • Writing with a clear voice doesn’t just happen; it requires conscious choices • You must practice the basic elements of voice

DICTION • Diction refers to the choice of words and is the foundation of voice and all good writing

Diction Exercise • Let’s take a simple sentence and see how it • would be possible to rewrite it:She took an apple from under the tree.First, let’s alter the order, or syntax: From under the tree she took an apple. She, from under the tree, took an apple. From under the tree, an apple she took. They all make sense; we haven’t altered the basic meaning. But all three of these altered versions change something: The first brings the rhyme (she/tree) closer together. The second plays on our notion of suspense. The third sounds like it belongs in a ballad or some other form where the “took” at the end of the sentence is there either for emphasis, or to set up a rhyme (“ . . . that crook!”).

Now let’s alter the vocabulary: She picked up a fruit from the ground, where it lay.She pilfered an apple that had fallen from its tree.The lovely woman stooped and grabbed the fallen apple. In all three versions we have the basic elements— a woman, an apple, a tree —but they are given different emphasis.

A poet reworks diction, not always to the best effect. Let’s combine some of the altered vocabulary and syntax from above: From under the tree a lovely woman pilfered a fruit. Well, maybe, but the diction should be working toward a single effect, or enhancing an image, or accommodating meter.

Instructions on DICTION • Try rewriting the following simple phrases by altering diction (syntax, vocabulary, or both) while preserving the original sense. Think of each as a single line: You don't necessarily have to expand or elaborate to alter diction. What effect are you trying to achieve? Write your responses in your NOTEBOOK. • I was awash in memories, reliving the innocence of times past.Then, without warning, a knock came at the door.They watched a pretty red sunset.

The whiskey on your breath Could make a small boy dizzy; But I hung on like death: Such waltzing was not easy. We romped until the pans Slid from the kitchen shelf; My mother’s countenance Could not unfrown itself. The hand that held my wrist Was battered on one knuckle; At every step you missed My right ear scraped a buckle. You beat time on my head With a palm caked hard by dirt, Then waltzed me off to bed Still clinging to your shirt. The poem is relatively brief, with clipped-sounding lines, and its language is for the most part reflective of a child’s vocabulary and thus a child’s perspective. Most of the words are monosyllabic, and if they are longer they are disyllabic, with one notable exception: the word countenance in line 7. The unusual diction in lines 6 and 7 stand out and give special weight to that section of the poem. “My Papa’s Waltz”Theodore Roethke

line 4 - "was not easy" This understated observation emphasizes that we are partially, even largely, in the mind of a child in this poem. There are more precise ways to describe the dance, but a child would probably not use a more sophisticated vocabulary. lines 7/8 - "My mother’s countenance / Could not unfrown itself." These are unusual and arresting lines in terms of diction, and they signal a change in the poem. Not only is countenance a relatively unusual word for facial expression, but the idea that the countenance has control over itself is odd. Also, unfrown is a made-up word, albeit one whose meaning is clear enough. These lines give special emphasis to the speaker’s consciousness of his mother. She is not mentioned anywhere else in the poem, but her disapproval of this scene and her apparent inability to do anything about it except scowl intensify the danger of the situation. If there is something potentially tragic about the interaction between father and child, there is also an audience forthe tragedy.

1).How does this examination of diction change your understanding of how the poem works as a whole? 2). Find other parts of the poem in which diction is important. What do they contribute to the work? Questions for Response

Detail • Detail refers to the facts, observations, and incidents that develop a topic • Writing is flat and boring without detail

Figurative Language • Figurative language is the use of words in an unusual way to reveal new meaning, meaning that is not literal and makes the reader think

Imagery • Imagery is the use of words to capture a sensory experience (what you hear, see, smell, taste, or touch). • Imagery brings life to what you write and makes it seem real.

Syntax • Syntax includes sentence structure, word order, and punctuation.

Tone • Tone is the expression of attitude in writing.

DICTION • THE AUTHOR’S CHOICE OF WORDS • JUST AS A PAINTER USES COLOR AND LIGHT OR A MUSICIAN USES SOUNDS AND RHYTHM, A WRITER USES WORDS. • THE PERFECT WORD IS CLEAR, CONCRETE, AND EXACT.

GOOD NICE PRETTY BEAUTIFUL FINE BAD THING REALLY VERY TERRIBLE WONDERFUL A LOT FORBIDDEN WORDS

You Can Do It!!!!! • Effective diction gives freshness and originality to writing. When you use words in surprising and unusual ways, you have the power to make people think, laugh, or examine new ideas. That’s a gift and a responsibility. Learn to experiment and play with words. You need a good vocabulary in order to be a good writer.

Read and Think • A redheaded woman was there with Trout. Kate could see her rummaging through the cabin, dumping drawers and knocking things from the shelves of cabinets. • 1. What picture do you get in your mind when you read the second sentence? • 2. How would the meaning of the sentence change if we changed some of the words? For example: Kate could see her searching through the cabin, emptying drawers and taking things off of the shelves of cabinets.

Now You Try It!!!!!!! • Write a sentence describing a small boy making a mess in a restaurant. Choose words that are clear, concrete, and exact. Start a collection of “perfect” Words you can use later in your writing.

PERFECT ACTION WORDS (VERBS) stand / slouch PERFECT WORDS TO DESCRIBE (ADJECTIVES) pretty / delicate Perfect Words

Elements of Voice