Discipline & Guidance

1. Discipline & Guidance The keys to well-behaved children.

2. Just for fun… • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yuMBf8zdMs • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CaafK0reVzs

3. Guidance • CONTINUAL long-term influence on behavior • Guide through example, word, action • Advice • Can be positive or negative

4. Discipline • Behavior medication when needed • Teach/train behavior by instruction and exercise

5. Punishment • Penalty inflicted for wrongdoing, a crime or offense • Verbal, withhold privileges negatively, hit, spank, hurt • Temporary and doesn’t teach self-discipline • Demeans child

6. Positive Discipline • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tBbL7VcNh0

7. Why do they do it? Reasons for Misbehavior

9. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLe7WuqwiKw&feature=youtu.be

10. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAyuhfZ85nE

11. 1. Normal behavior for the child’s age • The action is age and developmentally appropriate • Caregiver: Have appropriate expectations for the child’s developmental age

12. 2. Natural curiosity • The child is curious to know what the result or response would be for the action • Caregiver: Provide opportunities to experiment and satisfy curiosity

13. 3. They do not know any better • Inadequate or misunderstood instructions • They are trying something new and don’t realize the consequences • Caregiver: Have appropriate expectations for the child’s developmental age. Make sure instructions are clearly said and understood

14. 4. To get attention • The child just wants the caregiver’s attention – they prefer positive attention, but negative is attention too • Caregiver: Give attention only to that which you want to be repeated and ignore questionable or undesirable behavior.

15. 5. To get power • Children want some power and control in their lives • Caregiver: Refuse to engage in power struggles. Give children choices for what they want to do, wear, ear, etc. Listen to their ideas.

16. 6. For revenge • Children want to do what they want without anyone getting in the way • Caregiver: Discuss the mistaken goal, pay attention to appropriate choices, and provide love.

17. 7. Feeling inadequate or incapable • Constantly being corrected or being given negative reinforcement might make a kid quit trying because they are afraid to fail • Caregiver: provide encouragement for their successes and attempts. Refrain from jumping in or fixing every task

18. 8. The need to feel that they belong • Wanting to find a place in a family or peer group where they fit in. This place may be positive or negative, but the need is met. • Caregiver: Provide unconditional acceptance, concern, and interest in the child.

19. Importance of Consequences Setting Limits Natural VS Logical Consequences

20. Setting Limits • Setting limits with kids means setting a guideline for behavior, even when there is not an official household rule. Limits should benefit the child. • Guidelines for setting limits: • State your limits clearly and firmly. • Discuss limits in advance • Use consequences as a form of discipline when rules are broken • Give your child explanations for your limits and then listen to what they have to say about it

21. Natural VS Logical Consequences Natural Consequence Logical Consequences Occurs with interference from the caregiver and should be relevant to the misbehavior. It should be short in duration, not imposed in anger, and provide opportunities for the child to learn form their behavior. • Occur without interference by letting nature take its course. • The child can see the result of his behavior/choices.

22. Discipline Techniques Each child is different and different things will work for each child.

23. Positive Statements • Clearly State what the child is expected to do instead of telling them what not to do • Example: “Walk in the house” vs. “Don’t run in the house” • Get down on the child’s eye level to talk

24. Change these into Positive Statements:1. Don’t stand on the table!!!2. You are being very bad!3. Don’t chew with your mouth open, that’s disgusting!4. I can see your underwear. Put your dress down now!

25. Redirection • If a child is doing something you do not want them to do….give them something else to do. • Distract them with another option • Example: Have them jump on a trampoline instead of a bed

26. Reverse Attention • Ignore negative behavior when possible and reinforce the positive • POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT • Example – if their room is always messy, but one day they happen to have a really clean corner, then make a big deal out of the clean corner!

27. Limited Choices • Give children opportunities to make choices within caregiver’s limits • Limit the number of options provided • This gives a child practice making decisions and they feel in control of the situation

28. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL8kcHlzem0

29. Time Away/Cool Down Area • An area or time away where a child is able to calm down

30. Encouragement • Praise and encouragement for a child’s positive actions is a better motivator than punishment. • Children act better when they know what they are doing right and what is expected of them.

31. OtherIdeas • Loss of privilege • Take away something of worth to child (Ex: toy, time with friends, TV time, etc…)

32. Spanking?? • What are your thoughts? • Divide into the YES and NO parts of the room. • Let’s discuss it!

33. Super Nanny • If time…