Chapter 4

1. Chapter 4 Writing for Effect

2. Read the following letter. Dear Mr. Morley: Your December 3rd complaint was received and contents noted. After reviewing the facts, I regret to report that I must refuse your claim. If you will read the warranty brochure, you will see that the shelving you bought is designed for light loads --- a maximum of 800 pounds. You should have bought the heavy-duty product. I regret the damage this mistake caused you and trust that you will see our position. Hoping to be of service o you in the future, I remain, Sincerely yours,

3. In this message you detect more than just the readability problem you saw in Max’s reports. • The words are not polite. Instead of showing concern for the reader, they are blunt, tactless, and unfriendly. • Overall, they leave a bad impression in the reader’s mind --- the impression of a writer, and a business, unconcerned about the needs for good human relations.

4. Business Etiquette and the Need for Effect • Written communication within a business primarily requires clarity. • Business writing requires clarity and planned effect. • The goodwill effect is valuable to business. • Wise business leaders know that the success of their business is affected by what people think about the business. • They know that what people think about a business is influenced by their human contact with that business: the services they receive, how they are treated, the manners (etiquette) displayed, and such. The written word is a major form of human contact. • Most people enjoy building goodwill.

5. Conversational Style • One technique that helps build the goodwill effect is to write in conversational language. • By conversational language we mean language that resembles conversation. • It is warm and natural. • Such language leaves an impression that people like. • It is also the language we use most and understand best. • Because it is easily understood, it is good business etiquette to use it.

6. Resisting the Tendency to Be Formal • Writing in conversational language is not easy, for we tend to be stiff and formal. • We seek the big word, the difficult word. The result is cold and unnatural style --- one that doesn’t produce the goodwill effect you want your messages to have. • The following examples illustrate this problem and how to correct it.

8. Cutting Out “Rubber Stamps” • Rubber stamps (also called clichés) are expressions used by habit every time a certain type of situation occurs. They are used without thought and do not fit the present situation exclusively. • These phrases, while once quite appropriate, have become stale with overuse. • A blessing in disguise • As good as gold • Last but not the least • Back against the wall

9. Cutting Out “Rubber Stamps” • Expressions from the old language of business are rubber stamps. Some new ones exist. • I am happy to be able to answer your message. • I have received your message. • This will acknowledge receipt of …. • According to our records… • This is to inform you that…. • In accordance with your instructions… • You can avoid rubber stamps by writing in your conversational vocabulary.

11. You-Viewpoint • Writing from the you-viewpoint (also called you-attitude) is another technique for building goodwill in written messages. • You-viewpoint writing emphasizes the reader’s interests and concerns. • It is an attitude of mind involving more than the use of you and yours.

12. You-Viewpoint • Example: I am happy to report….. You-viewpoint: You will be happy to know…. • Example: We make Kodak digital cameras in three levels: beginner, intermediate, and professional. You-viewpoint: Kodak makes cameras for you in three models: basic, standard, and full-featured.

13. You-Viewpoint • Even a bad-news situation can benefit from you-viewpoint wording. We cannot comply with your request to use our staff on your project, for it would cost us more than we can afford. • You-viewpoint: As a business professor, you will understand why we must limit our staff to work in our office.

15. You-Viewpoint • Some say that the you-viewpoint is insincere and manipulative. • It can be insincere, but it need not be. • Using the you-viewpoint is just being courteous. Research supports its use.

16. Accent on Positive Language • Of the many ways of saying anything, each has a unique meaning. • Positive words are usually best for message goals, especially where persuasion and goodwill is needed. • Negative words stir up resistance and hurt goodwill. • So beware of strongly negative words (mistake, problems), words that deny (no, do not), and ugly words (itch, guts).

17. Example: We regret to inform you that we cannot permit you to use our auditorium for your meeting, as the Ladies Investment Club asked for it first. We can, however, let you use our conference room, but it seats only 60. Compared to Although the Ladies Investment Club has reserved the auditorium for Saturday, we can instead offer you our conference room, which seats 60.

19. Courtesy • Courtesy is a major contributor to goodwill in business documents. • Courtesy involves the preceding goodwill techniques, and also some other techniques discussed below.

20. Courtesy 1. Singling out your reader: It involves writing directly for the one reader. This means writing for the one situation. 2. Refraining from preaching: The effect of courtesy is helped by not preaching (lecturing). Usually preaching is not intended. It often results from efforts to persuade. Elementary, flat, and obvious statements often sound preachy.

21. Courtesy • Example: You must take advantage of savings like this if you are to be successful. The pennies you save pile up. In time you will have dollars. • It is insulting to tell the reader something quite elementary as if it were not known. Such obvious information should be omitted. • Another form of preachiness takes this obvious question-and-answer pattern: “Would you like to make a deal that would make you a 38% profit? Of course you would!”

22. Courtesy 3. Doing more than is expected: for example, at the end of question paper, some teachers write “Good luck!” 4. Avoiding anger: It destroys goodwill. Example: If you had read Section IV of your policy, you would know that you are not covered on accidents that occur on water. Compared to As a review of Section IV of your policy indicates, you are covered on accidents that occur on the grounds of your residence only.

23. Courtesy • Other examples: I cannot understand your negligence. We will not tolerate this condition. Your careless attitude has caused us a loss in sales. 5. Being sincere: Too much you-viewpoint sounds insincere. Exaggerated statements are obviously insincere. Superlatives (greatest, finest, strongest, etc.) often suggest exaggeration.

24. Courtesy Examples: • Never has there been, nor will there be, a fan as smooth running and whispering quiet as the North Wind. • Everywhere coffee drinkers meet, they are talking about the amazing whiteness of Colgate gives their teeth.

25. The Role of Emphasis • Emphasis also determines effect. Every item communicated should get the proper emphasis. • There are four basic emphasis techniques. 1. Emphasis by position: Position determines emphasis. Beginnings and endings carry emphasis. • The first and last sentences of a message, the first and last sentences of a paragraph, and the first and last words of a sentence all carry more importance than the middle parts.

26. The Role of Emphasis 2. Space and emphasis: The more space a topic is given, the more emphasis the topic receives. 3. Sentence structure and emphasis: Short, simple sentences emphasize content; long, involved ones do not. 4. Mechanical means of emphasis: Mechanical devices (underscore, color, diagrams, etc.) also give emphasis to content.