Welcome To EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE TRAINING

1. Welcome ToEMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCETRAINING 24 March 2009 Payyanur College Payyanur By C. Radhakrishnan

2. “We are being judged by a new yardstick; not just how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also how well we handle ourselves and each other.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Working with Emotional Intelligence

3. Good Personality Attributes of a person with “Good personality”? • Good physique • Pleasing manners • Personal and Professional integrity • Trustworthiness and reliability • Good control over body and mind EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

4. What is Emotional Intelligence? • Emotional intelligence is not about being nice all the time • It is about being honest. • Emotional intelligence is not about being “touchy-feely.” • It is about being aware of your feelings, and those of others. • Emotional intelligence is not about being emotional. • It is about being smart with your emotions. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

5. According to Daniel Goleman • A set of key skills, abilities and competencies that can be learned by anyone. (unlike traditional Intelligence Quotient (IQ) which is primarily innate) • He writes that emotional intelligence include such skills as being able to motivate oneself, being persistent in facing obstacles and achieve goals, controlling impulses and delaying gratification, controlling one’s moods, thinking rationally, empathizing with others and hoping. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

6. Today’s Training Will Help You • Understand emotional intelligence and why it is important to personal and professional success. • Recognize five competencies you can work on to increase your level of emotional intelligence. • Listen to and employ your emotions for better decision making. • Show you care, and build trust by displaying sensitivity and concern. • Use your energy and enthusiasm to motivate others. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

7. Saarni, Carolyn (1999)American “Folk Theories” of Emotion • The volcano theory (“If you don’t vent your emotions, you’ll explode”) • The tidal wave theory (“ Don’t ever lose control because your feelings will overwhelm you”) • The out-of-sight/out-of mind theory (If you don’t think about your feelings, they will go away) • The Vulcan theory (“ Your emotions are irrational and illogical, they only get in the way of solving problems”) EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

8. Personal Benefits ofEmotional Intelligence • Greater career success • Stronger personal relationships • Increased optimism and confidence • Better health EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

9. Professional Benefits ofEmotional Intelligence • Effective leadership skills • Improved communication • Less workplace conflict • Better problem solving skills • Increased likelihood of promotion EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

10. The Five Essential Competencies of Emotional Intelligence EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

11. SELF-AWARENESS EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

12. SELF-AWARENESS Do I believe ... EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE ... my own self-perception and the evaluation of others? ... what God says about me?

13. SELF-AWARENESS • Self-awareness includes recognition of our personality, our strengths and weaknesses, our likes and dislikes. • Developing self-awareness can help us to recognise when we are stressed or under pressure. • It is also often a prerequisite for effective communication and interpersonal relations, as well as for developing empathy for others. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

14. SELF-AWARENESS • “If you understand your own feelings you get a really great handle on how you’re going to interact and perform with others… • So one of the first starting points is, ‘what’s going on inside of me?” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Mr. Chuck Wolfe President, C. J. Wolfe Associates, LLC

15. Practicing Self-Awareness • Awareness of our own emotional states is the foundation of all the E.I. skills. • Learn to “tune-in” to your emotions – they can give you valid information about your responses to stressful situations. • Recognize the importance of emotions even in “technical” fields. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

16. Self-Regulation Will Skill Knowledge Base Strategies Motivation Meta Cognition Awareness Deliberate Practices Feedback EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Self-Efficacy Attribution Regulation of one’s Cognition Knowledge of one’s Cognition

17. Self-regulation “If we are in a heightened state of agitation or anger we cannot make good decisions, we cannot reason well.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Christine Casper Communication, Motivation & Management Inc.

18. Practicing Self-Regulation • Accept responsibility for choosing your own emotional responses. • Learn to “reframe” stressful situations into ones that are challenging. • Be aware of, and learn to manage, your own emotional “triggers.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

19. Self-Motivation EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

20. Self-Motivation • “High performers are those who are able to see with some clarity to what degree they are responsible for a setback and to what degree it may be circumstance or other people, and as a result they are able to be more persistent.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Dr. J.P. Pawliw-Fry Co-Director, Inst. For Health & Human Potential

21. Practicing Self-Motivation • Recognize that emotions affect your performance. • Identify your “explanatory style.” When a setback strikes, resist asking “what’s wrong with me?” Instead, ask “what can I fix?” • Work to achieve your “flow state,” being in the moment with work tasks. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

22. Steps in the Motivational Cycle EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

23. 8 mental steps to self-motivation • Use visual motivators: Inspirational quote or poster - Cartoon or joke • Keep positive friends: Those support and build you up • Read and listen well: Books and tapes • Positive self-talk: Be your own best encourager • Life can be tough -get used to it:Life is not always fair; it’s rarely easy. Stop thinking life should be easy. • Keep a positive attitude:Choose your attitude towards your circumstances. • Take a break: Take some time to re-charge your emotional and spiritual batteries. • Share with others:Once you are motivated yourself, start motivating others. It will drive you to new heights of accomplishment! EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

24. Empathy Types Of Empathy EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE The first Empathy is with a person’s Actual Situation The second Empathy is with a person’s Aspirations

25. Empathy “If people will stop for a moment and put themselves in another person’s shoes…it will help them modify their own behavior. It will help them develop relationships with those people.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Darryl Grigg, Ed.D. Co-Developer, American Express Emotional Competence Program

26. Practicing Empathy • Empathy means recognizing, and responding appropriately to, the emotions of others. • By expressing empathy, you also create empathy in others. • Realize that emotions impact such measurable goals as productivity and safety. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

27. Effective Relationships EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

28. Creating Effective Relationships • Employ all your emotional competencies – awareness, regulation, motivation, and empathy – to: • Influence and persuade others. • Build consensus and support for team goals. • Motivate and inspire yourself and others to achieve those goals. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

29. Ten Commandments Of Human Relationships • Speak to People 2. Smile at People 3. Call People by Name 4. Be Friendly and Helpful 5. Be Cordial 6. Be Genuinely Interested In People 7. Be Generous With Praise 8. Be Considerate 9. Be Alert 10. Have a Good Sense of Humour • Don't take yourself too seriously. When you add lots of patience, and humility, you will have a recipe for enduring success. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

30. To Sum Up Emotional Intelligence Map Self-AwarenessEmpathy Emotional Awareness Understand Others Accurate Self-Assessment Developing Others Self-Confidence Service Orientation Self ManagementLeveraging Diversity Self Control Political Awareness Trustworthiness Social Skills (Relationships) Conscientiousness Influence AdaptabilityCommunication Innovation Conflict Management MotivationLeadership Achievement Drive Change Catalyst Commitment Building Bonds Initiative Collaboration & Cooperation Optimism Team Capabilities EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

31. To Sum Up How to Increase Your EQ • Conduct a “personal inventory.” • Analyze the setting & identify skills needed. • Enlist trusted friends. • Focus on a few competencies. • Practice, practice, practice. • Be observant and reflective. • Don’t expect immediate results. • Learn from your mistakes. • Acknowledge your successes. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

32. To Sum Up "And so there's a real pay-off. The people who will become the leaders, the people who will become the star performers, are the ones who have the strengths in the key emotional intelligence abilities.” EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Daniel Goleman, Ph.D. Founder, Emotional Intelligence Services

33. References: • Gardner, H. (1983). Frames of Mind. New York: Basic Books. • Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional intelligence. New York: Bantam Books. • Mayer, J.D., Salovey, P., & Caruso, D. (2000). Models of Emotional • Intelligence. In Ed. R.J. Sternberg’s Handbook of Intelligence (pp. 396-420). Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press. • Liptak, J.J. Using Emotional Intelligence to help students succeed in college. Journal of Employment Counseling. EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

34. ? Thanks! You can always email me for clarification or assistance. smartteacher@rediffmail.com EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE