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The boys’ favorite things to do together are play video games, talk about video games, and taunt each other. This sort of taunting is tolerable, a sign of affection almost, coming as it does from true friends. THE MAIN CHARACTERS ERIC ELLIS JACKIE TAYLOR ELIZABETH GINSBURG JIMMY SCHISSEL
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The boys’ favorite things to do together are play video games, talk about video games, and taunt each other. This sort of taunting is tolerable, a sign of affection almost, coming as it does from true friends.
THE MAIN CHARACTERS ERIC ELLIS JACKIE TAYLOR ELIZABETH GINSBURG JIMMY SCHISSEL LILY MASON
MAIN TOPICS: COMMUNICATION RELATIONSHIPS BEHAVIORAL CHANGES IN ADOLESCENTS MASLOW’S HIERARCHY OF NEEDS TEACHER PERSPECTIVES BULLYING
COMMUNICATION In the nineteenth century people came calling, in the twentieth century they phoned, and now preteens communicate on the Internet. They type to each other fast as thirty-dollar-an-hour secretaries (except that secretaries can spell), one instant-message box on the screen for each conversation: Wus^. NMJC
RELATIONSHIPS Sometimes the stars converge and a boy and girl actually go out. “Out,” these first times, would better be described as “in,” either because of discomfort or lack of opportunities. A few awkward phone calls, a lot of empty instant-messaging, a mildly flirtatious note or two, a slow dance at the school social, no kisses, no dates. Still, the elation could be immense, and the heartbreak inevitable, rejection being the most miserable thing imaginable.
RELATIONSHIPS—BOYS AND GIRLS It seems like everyone is ganging up on me these days and taking sides, like I’m a nobody,” one seventh grader says. “Like, one day we’ll be really cool and hanging out, and the next day one of them is all mad at me for saying the wrong thing.” God, this sort of thing drives Ms. Thomas nuts. “Best friends one day and the next day they hate each other. And the girls just don’t let it go. Boys, if they have an issue, they get it out and it’s over. Girls, it can linger for quite a while. So dramatic. Ugh.
BEHAVIORAL CHANGES IN ADOLESCENTS Just like that, Jimmy has stopped sitting up in bed wondering about the universe. “I’m not that curious anymore,” he says. This, too, is part of the changes engulfing him as he enters adolescence. No longer is pleasing his parents a major factor in the equation of how to spend his time. Just the contrary: For reasons he cannot figure out even while it’s happening—and not like he loves them any less—Jimmy, like his peers, finds great sport in contradicting his mother and father. Kids don’t dance face to face anymore. A boy approaches a girl from behind and grinds his groin against her butt. At school and church dances the chaperones act as freak cops. But at teen dance clubs like the one a half-hour away in suburban Baltimore where a few Wilde Lake kids have gone, children as young as eleven simulate sex on the dance floor as rappers bleat about oral gratification. (87)
MASLOW’S HIERARCHY OF NEEDS It’s no mystery to the staff that Eric’s home situation has a huge amount to do with his academic problems and his behavior, and that worse problems could emerge soon if it doesn’t improve.
TEACHER PERSPECTIVES A teacher can give students a dozen opportunities to retake the quiz they bombed—Come in before school! At study hall! At lunch! After school!—and they won’t, either because they forget or because their time is too important to them. A child can be asked again and again how her social studies project is coming, and she’ll say it’s done; then, the day before it’s due, she asks for help. “Middle-school kids,” Ms. Thomas says, “have to move around. They have to be able to talk, they want to be engaged in what they’re learning, and you really can’t do anything in the classroom for more than fifteen or twenty minutes without losing the class.” A teacher learns at a middle school seminar to divide his class into four segments: the teacher speaking, the students speaking, the students working alone, the students working in groups. When the teacher doesn’t make movement a priority, the students fidget.
BULLYING IN SCHOOLS Dodge ball has been banned this year in the Howard County public schools—too violent, too humiliating. In a way, middle school is a game of dodge ball, except instead of a red ball you avoid annoying people. Teasing is some people had their way, would become a federal crime. Brightly colored pamphlets tout efforts like the National Education Association’s National Bullying Awareness Campaign; “bully proofing” schools is debated on the floors of Congress, with that idea that bullying is why angry teens turn guns on their classmates; Miss America takes it up as her platform. Just like with sexual harassment, schools teach prevention. Lily has been pleading with Mia to do an act together at the outdoor-ed talent show, and even though they did one last year, Mia says no way. “This is middle school,” she says. “People look for the littlest thing to pick you apart.”
BULLYING IN SCHOOLS WHAT’S THE WORST THEY CAN SAY? Gay. Used to describe an activity, say, or a book, it’s a simple synonym for “lame.” Used to describe a person, it’s the biggest insult in the male middle-school lexicon. If someone called you gay, a boy this age figures it would be even more upsetting than if he spied on you in the shower or pulled your pants down or even made you touch him. A boy knows he can’t deviate or he’s a “fag.” Not being a fag preoccupies him. Being normal preoccupies him.
THOUGHTS The section of the brain where thoughts about notes and gymnastics jackets once resided is now occupied by thoughts about themselves. There came a time when it was no longer okay to be nice………..
DID THEY DO ENOUGH? THAT’S WHAT THEY ALWAYS SAY EDUCATE RAISE AWARENESS
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REFERENCES Alexander, B. (2010, October 2). The Bullying of Seth Walsh: Requiem for a Small-Town Boy. Time. Danah Boyd, A.M (2011, September 22). Bullying as True Drama. The New York Times. Department of Health and Human Services. (n.d.). Retrieved November 5, 2011, from www.stopbullying.gov: http://www.stopbullying.gov/index.html O’Hare, P. (2010, September 27). Parents: Bullying drove Cy-Fair 8th grader to suicide. Houston Chronicle. Orciari, M. (2011, November 9). Adolescents report weight as primary reason for bullying at school. Yale News. Perlstein, L. (2003). Not Much Just Chillin’: The hidden lives of middle schoolers. New York: Farrar. Straus and Giroux. Osterweil, N. (November 8, 2011). Bullying Victims Suffer Long-Term Depression. Clinical Psychiatry News. Retrieved from http://www.clinicalpsychiatrynews.com/index.php?id=2426&tx_ttnews%5Btt_news%5D=88809&c Hash=8ac750a9b2&utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter