Lecture Eighteen Polishing

1. Lecture Eighteen Polishing 词语润色

2. Main Contents of This Lecture • I. Definition • II. Ways of Polishing

3. I. Definition 词语润色（Polishing） • 润饰文字，英语叫 polish，中文叫“琢磨”，是从制玉器时精细加工引申出来的意义。译文章，同制玉器一样，初具规模以后，还得精细加工，务求达意传神。这是翻译工作的最后一道工序，也是极重要的一个技巧。

4. II. Ways of Polishing • 润饰文字，可以从三个方面入手 • i)文理通顺（严谨） • Ii). 句简词精（琢磨） • Iii).达意传神（创新）。

5. i). 文理通顺 讲究中文语法和逻辑的严谨，反复推敲，一丝不苟，尽力做到忠实通顺。 • 1．注意中文的语法 • 2．注意译文是否已确切表达出原文的实质内容 • 3．注意逻辑关系 • 4．遣词用字注意避免引起误解

6. 1．注意中文的语法 • 简单地说，翻译是以英文句子为“蓝本”，照着英文意思和形式造中文句子，中英文语法不同，表现方式不同，英语句子往往又是冗长，复杂，或者是生疏的句型，因此很容易译出语病，往往照顾了一头，忽视了另一头。

7. They were then friendly to me and my opinion. • （对我……，也很支持……） • To feed, clothe, and rehabilitate one and a half million men—it was necessary, but agonizingly difficult. • (要给……提供……，并使……)

8. When the news reached him, perturbed more by the disgrace of his own troop than by the success of the enemy, he resorted to a new measure. • （与其说……不如说……）

9. 2．注意译文是否已确切表达出原文的实质内容2．注意译文是否已确切表达出原文的实质内容 • In the end a telegram only fairly satisfactory from my point of view was dispatched. • (在我看来勉强还……)

10. Their language was almost restrained by any motives of prudence. • 他们几乎是口无遮拦（爱讲什么就讲什么），全然不考虑慎重不慎重的问题。

11. 3．注意逻辑关系 • 原文的逻辑是清楚的，但翻译时句子经过改组或套用成语，有时会造成逻辑不通的文字。

12. High personages were implicated, and the long crisis that followed this discovery forced the resignation of the president and his government. • 此事牵涉到许多高级官员，事情败露以后出现的长期危机……

13. They have some home-made armored cars, and have quite rightly a nice conceit of themselves. • （合情合理的） • When you deal with a beast you have to treat him as a beast. • (以其道还治其身)

14. 4．遣词用字注意避免引起误解 • It is said that Marco polo personally visited six Sumatran kingdoms. • (岛上的六个……) • No other man ever stooped to flatter her so much. • 任何人也没有像他一样对她那么曲意奉承。

15. In front of the house, there were maize fields stretching to the foot of the snow-capped range. • （……山脉的脚下）

16. ii).句简词精（流畅） 文章的体裁不同，对译文流畅的具体要求也应不同。若是翻译小说散文，流畅应含有文字雅致优美的意思；若是翻译诗歌，最好还要讲求抑扬顿挫，押韵合辙；翻译社会科学、自然科学文章，则要求明白晓畅。原作的笔调不同，我们对译文文字的要求也不能一概而论，原作活泼自如，译文拘板滞泥，则是没有尽到责任。原文平直无文，译文也很难做到活泼生动。不过，不管具体文章的体裁风格如何，对译文的一个起码要求应该是句简词精。

17. 笔译一般都是用书面语，它不同于日常口头上用的大白话。书面文字总是要讲究一点，简练畅达，有点文采，符合汉语规范，读起来上口，听起来入耳，这就是我们所说的句简词精的意思。笔译一般都是用书面语，它不同于日常口头上用的大白话。书面文字总是要讲究一点，简练畅达，有点文采，符合汉语规范，读起来上口，听起来入耳，这就是我们所说的句简词精的意思。 • 要做到这一点，应该注意翻译文字上的三忌：噜苏话、学生腔、洋腔洋调。

18. 1．忌罗嗦话 • I surprised the company by refusing to drink the dark red beverage poured out of a fat-bellied bottle neatly dressed in a tight-fitting straw jacket. • (我……，使……。这种饮料是从……)

19. We must be skillful to determine which difficulties will resolve themselves and which spread their rot when shoved under the rug. (自行消失……越捂越糟)

20. 2．忌学生腔 • 用词造句生硬、呆板、不自然、套用固定程式，千篇一律，千句一型。 • It is a small, old-fashioned but important port. • (一个老式的小港，但很重要)

21. This was an added embarrassment. • (又是一件难堪事) • Mr Roosevelt invited me to join him at dinner in his villa. “Let us make it a family affair,” he said. • (家常便饭)

22. The telephone announced that the Ambassador must see me at once and was on his way. He arrived with unusual perturbation. • (他来时，神色……)

23. 3．忌洋腔洋调 • 舍弃合适而流畅的中文不用，而硬要仿照英文格式翻译出既不符合汉语规范、又不适合中国人习惯的译文。

24. We were told that the new leader was going to speak to us. • He was so arrogant that no one will keep company with him。 • 他很狂妄自大，谁也不愿与他交往。

25. 为了使译文做到句简词精，可以从三个方面着手：为了使译文做到句简词精，可以从三个方面着手： • 适当运用词组； • 讲究中文的对仗； • 注意译文音调的和谐。

26. 词组： • But there is a great difference between the two gardens: the one is conventional in every respect, the other natural. • (未能脱俗……野趣天成) • I felt anxious about the effect of this prolonged and acrimonious discussion. • (旷日持久、用语刻薄的……)

27. He is a jovial giant, with a huge appetite for food, drink and women. • 他生性乐观，身材魁梧，贪吃贪喝又贪色。

28. He was mature in years and tried in wars, but had the old, inbred arrogance of his family. • 他正当年壮，久经沙场，但是却带有他的家族那种年深日久、代代相传的傲慢习气。

29. The second world war bought him rapid battle promotion, but only to a temporary rank in the lowest grade of general officer. • ……屡建战功，晋升很快，但不过是被授予将级军官中最低一级的军衔，且为时不长。

30. It was a punishing job, with an awe-inspiring daily dosage of reading. • ……苦差使，每天阅读量之大，使人望而生畏。

31. 对仗： • His assets were learning, memory and a mastery of language；his ungainly figure and his stiffness of gesture were disadvantages. • 博闻强记，长于辞令，是他的优点;而体形不雅，姿势呆板，则是他的短处。

32. 音调： • war and peace • Hrs trip to the United States in April almost produced no positive results. • （积极结果？） • Mr Jarden was playing for high stakes, but so was Mr Marcus. • (赌注很大……也不小)

33. iii).达意传神（创新） • “艺高人胆大”，语言功底坚实，敢于运用生动活泼的语言，不要只是制造一些“粗坯”。

34. The facts are more prosaic than the legend. He was in no sense an innovator. • (不如…神乎其神) • Despite the great age gap between them, an instant affinity asserted itself. • （…志趣相投，一见如故）

35. 翻译的难处通常并不在句子的冗长繁复，而在一些关键词上。对于这些关键词，可分别采取下列方法：翻译的难处通常并不在句子的冗长繁复，而在一些关键词上。对于这些关键词，可分别采取下列方法： • 1.顺词就意， • 2.略添枝叶， • 3.易起炉灶。

36. 1．顺词就意： • Disillusion, however, was immediate and brutal. The politicians showed that behind their patriotic phrases their only true preoccupations were with their own political fortunes or those of their parties. • 然而，接着便是…，政客们满口爱国爱国，但在这些词令背后…

37. He was agreeably surprised. …… • 又惊又喜 • Their relations were vinegar, although Mr. A when speaking of Mr .B in his absence was acidly correct. • 关系很别扭， 虽然……在背后谈起B先生时语中带刺但还不失分寸。

38. The General’s ego was of suitably gigantic proportions. • 将军心中的“我”字还很大/自我意识… • Sometimes he was extravagant to downright nonsense, but with someone the glittering dross passed current for pure gold. …… • 信口雌黄…漂亮空话…金玉良言

39. 2．添枝加叶（使意义完整，易于理解） • In his eyes, this amounted to self-defeating appeasement. • ……无异于姑息养奸，自寻失败。 • It was an uphill work. • ……如同爬山，非常吃力。

40. He did not begin to feel at home until he separated from his wife. • ……如鱼得水，自由自在。

41. 3．另起炉灶 • His sufferance of fools was short lived. …… • 对于蠢人蠢事是容忍不下去的。 • His reputation and achievements outlive him. • 他虽然去世了，他的……

42. In the years I worked in that department I never knew anything but the best and most disinterested service. • ……只知道克已奉公，尽力而为。