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DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY. ASSIGNMENT. To describe a familiar object utilizing only SENSE DETAILS : - sight -taste -sound -touch -smell To describe only the physical characteristics; To appeal to the senses; to use concrete details. TOPICS.
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ASSIGNMENT • To describe a familiar object utilizing onlySENSE DETAILS: -sight -taste -sound -touch -smell • To describe only the physical characteristics; • To appeal to the senses; to use concrete details
TOPICS 1) Your dorm room or bedroom (the room in your home where you spend the most time); 2) Your automobile; 3) The master bedroom in Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Tell-Tale Heart”
PREWRITING 1) 5 SENSES • make 5 lists (one for each sense) • sight, smell, sound, taste, touch • under each, list as many relevant details regarding your topic as possible
PREWRITING 2) IMPRESSIONS • from the previous lists, make connections between items on the previous lists • group according to likeness • that is, certain sense details are related by the impression that they create • “eerie” • “messy” • “feminine”
PREWRITING 3) DOMINANT IMPRESSION • the longest list of impressions from the previous lists will be your dominant impression, • the most striking impression concerning your object • to this list add • adjectives • adverbs • similes/metaphors
PREWRITING 4) SYNONYMS • Make a list of synonyms for your Dominant Impression • Consult a thesaurus • “Tidy”: • neat • orderly • organized • uncluttered • anal-retentive/obsessive-compulsive
INTRODUCTION FUNNEL EFFECT • Generalize 1st • Introduce your topic • Most people, Most college students • Narrow your focus • Some • Others • Focus on you • Me • End with Thesis Statement
GENERALIZE 1st • -Introduce your topic • -Most college students THESIS • NARROW your FOCUS • -Some • -Others • FOCUS on YOU • -Me
INTRODUCTIONFUNNEL EFFECT: EXAMPLES 1) Owning a car these days is a necessity, for none more than the community college student. (OR) Everybody needs a car these days, especially students at a community college. Looking around the parking lot at Luzerne County Community College, I usually see three types of cars: the new, high-end graduation-gift cars, the modified sports cars, and the run-down first cars. Unfortunately, my car is one of the latter.... (thesis with clear Dominant Impression: My gray 1986 Oldsmobile Omega is a Bondo Buggy, especially in terms of its exterior, interior, and trunk.)
INTRODUCTIONFUNNEL EFFECT: EXAMPLES 2) Most people have a place to go to feel refreshed when life gets too tough. (OR) Most people have a place they visit to get away from everyday life. It could be a car, a place in nature, or a room at home. For me it is my bedroom. (then comes the thesis with clearly stated Dominant Impression)
INTRODUCTIONTHESIS STATEMENT • Comes at the end of the first paragraph (“Funnel Effect”) TOPIC + MAIN IDEA + SUPPORT
INTRODUCTIONTHESIS STATEMENT • Example for Descriptive Essay: • My car is a junker in terms of its…. • Three aspects of my car that make it a junker are the front seat, the back seat, and the trunk. • Contains the Dominant Impression and the 3 aspects/parts of your object that support it. TOPIC: MY CAR D.I.: JUNKER SUPPORT: (1) FRONT SEAT (2) BACK SEAT (3) TRUNK
INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION *CHARACTERISTICS of a Dominant Impression: • *ADJECTIVE or NOUN* • Declared in thesis statement • Unifying or controlling aspect; ambiance; this will link all of your sense details. • Without this, your details are like marbles without a jar. • The first adjective that comes to mind when you think of your car.
DOMINANT IMPRESSION SENSE DETAIL SENSE DETAIL SENSE DETAIL ALL SENSE DETAILS RELATE TO & SUPPORT DOMINANT IMPRESSION
INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION *HOW TO CREATE a Dominant Impression: • Write the 5 senses on a blank sheet of paper with room beneath each to write; • Then, list as many details that appeal to a particular sense under its name; • Go from the front of the car to the back & from the outside to the inside; • Then, see which details are related to each other, that paint a similar picture of the object, and group them together; • What these details relate to will be your Dominant Impression.
INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION: EXAMPLES ROOM: • oasis of peace, • tranquil refuge, • feminine/masculine, • reflects personality (*you must briefly define your personality; use the appropriate adjective before the word “personality”: creative personality, artistic temperament), • reflects my musical tastes, • disaster area, • pig sty
INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION: EXAMPLES CAR: • total embarrassment, Bondo Buggy, • off-road monster, • Junk Mobile, • typical college student’s (in terms of mess, neglect, ...), • typical first car (in terms of price, efficiency...), • “The Black Beauty,” “The Polar Bear” • giant toy, sporty car, Daddy’s car, • accessorized car (“Pimp My Ride”) (tricked out)
BODY: DO’sQualities of a Strong Descriptive Essay 1)***DESCRIBE—DO NOT LIST!! • Describe items found in your car/room; • Lists do not describe; lists are more exemplary than descriptive; • This is a descriptive essay using sense details, not an illustrative essay using reasons; • Show rather than tell
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 2) SENSE DETAILS only: • Appeal to the 5 senses, not just sight • Appeal to as many of the 5 that are relevant • Consult your prewriting lists • Relying solely on sight leads to LISTS • Number, size, shape, texture, material, odor/scent, taste, sound
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 3) SIMILES & METAPHORS: • use similes & metaphors to reinforce your D.I. • EX: “The smell is like…” OR “The smell reminds me of wet, moldy leaves soaking in a crammed rain gutter for a month. (not a pleasing D.I.) • rust = cancer, leprosy, flesh-eating bacteria; • “angry red beast:” headlights = giant glaring eyes, grill=hungry chrome jaws, bumper=chin with battle scars (continue the metaphor throughout, only those details that support “beastly”) • *Warning: Similes only support your sense details; they do NOT replace the need for sense details.
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 4) Relate all SENSE DETAILS to your DOMINANT IMPRESSION: • all details should reinforce your D.I. • if it does not, omit the detail • all sense details and metaphors should support a single impression • this is NOT a “word picture” in which you describe every aspect of your car • instead, focus your description on your D.I.
BODYRelate all SENSE DETAILS to your DOMINANT IMPRESSION • Repeat THESIS: • “Another aspect of my room that makes it a pig sty is….” • at the start of each paragraph • ADJECTIVES and ADVERBS that are synonymous with your Dominant Impression • ADJ: busy = hectic, energetic, bustling, crowded, swarming, packed, jammed, overrun, popular, populous, active, lively
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 5) Use TRANSITIONS: • between sentences (logically or spatially connect details in each sentence) AND • between paragraphs (repeat thesis) 6) Use proper PN REFERENCE: • *especially when generalizing in Introduction • Everyone has a place he/she could call his/her own. • see how the use of “he/she” gets old fast • so go plural: Most people have a place they could call their own.
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 7) DICTION:—use creative, selective, and pointed details & words (employ concrete/specific word choice) 8) Include an INTRODUCTION (see above) and a CONCLUSION (see below or consult the textbook) 9) Have a CLEAR VISION of the object (best to visit the place you will describe)
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 10) Have a CAREFUL SELECTION of DETAILS • only those that support your DI 11) Maintain a consistent point-of-view (POV) • no second person POV “you” • your room, your car, your impression, your details your POV (speak from the “I”)
BODYOTHER CHARACTERISITICS OF A STRONG DESCRIPTIVE ESSAY 12) COHERENCE: • develop a logical flow of ideas/details • “camera angle” 13) Paragraph Structure: • 3 Body paragraphs = 3 parts of car/room • do NOT arrange the essay around the senses (each paragraph is not one of the senses) 14) *REMEMBER: • this is NOT a “why” or “because” essay which is supported with reasons • instead, use aspect, feature, characteristic, portion
BODYTAKE THE HINT • SENSE DETAILS ONLY • ONLY THOSE SENSE DETAILS THAT SUPPORT YOUR DOMINANT IMPRESSION • IF ANY DETAIL DOES NOT SUPPORT YOUR DOMINANT IMPRESSION—NO MATTER HOW “COOL” OR INTERESTING IT MAY BE—OMIT IT FROM THIS ESSAY
BODY: DON’Ts 1) ***DO NOT LIST items found in your car/room; this does not describe; lists are more exemplary than descriptive (this is a descriptive essay using sense details, not an illustrative essay using reasons) (show rather than tell) 2) Do NOT just throw ideas onto the page; make sure you have a Dominant Impression -- a clear purpose, a point; be a movie director and limit what you want the audience to see, to see it/them from your perspective
BODY: DON’Ts 3) Do NOT describe emotions, feelings, personality (these are not sense details) 4) Do NOT use pat expressions/clichés (rough around the edges), contractions (I’ve, it’s), poor diction (“things,” “a lot”), or abbreviations (especially CD=compact disc) 5) *NUMBERS: 3+ syllables/numerals = 350, 1 or 2 syllables/numerals = six, twenty-five; year = 1998, 2005)
CONCLUSIONPURPOSE of CONCLUDING PARAGRAPHS • To stress the importance/relevance of your thesis (SO WHAT?!) • To repeat your purpose • To repeat your thesis (moral, point, lesson, Dominant Impression) • To repeat your main ideas • To give the essay a sense of completeness/finality • To leave the reader with a final impression (*this is your last chance to convince/persuade the reader, so make the most of it!)
CONCLUSION SUGGESTIONS • Discuss in full the lesson learned • Suggest larger implications of your findings • Suggest future papers or research • Refer back to your purpose and/or scenario mentioned in your Introduction • Pose rhetorical questions • Offer a 3rd side to the issue • End with a CLINCHER SENTENCE
CONCLUSIONCLINCHER SENTENCE • Just as you ended each Body paragraph with a concluding sentence that wrapped up that point/paragraph, so too will you end the entire essay • (Thesis Statement : Topic Sentence :: Clincher Sentence : Paragraph Clincher Sentence) • Avoid the empty cliché • Wrap it all up • Relate to your point (for example, if you wrote a process paper on making a PB&J sandwich, end by saying that you are now hungry for one)
SENSE DETAILS Dominant Impression BODY STRUCTURE: 3 Body paragraphs 3 parts of the room/car Each supported by: sense details ONLY metaphors to support DI LISTS = prohibited SHOW SPATIAL ORDER REASONS Argument/Claim BODY STRUCTURE: 3 Body paragraphs 3 reasons Each supported by: examples descriptive details narratives types/roles LISTS = permissible TELL EMPHATIC ORDER Descriptive Essay VS Example Essay