PBS Makes a Difference: One Family’s Story

1. PBS Makes a Difference: One Family’s Story Sandy Roethler • PBS Forum • October 2008

2. Professional and Personal Role in PBS I was: • Executive Director serving parents of children with emotional impairments • Co-Principal Investigator of federal children’s mental health grant • Member of PBS advisory teams • Mother of a child in a PBS School

3. Scott’s Path, My Path • Permission • Whose story? • Shifting perspective

4. Who was My Child? • Smart, funny, creative, affectionate, warm • Hated himself/depressed/talked about dying • Was “Top of the Triangle” • Special education for emotional impairment • I knew he wasn’t that kid

5. Who was I? • An Accomplice • A Task Master • Non-empathetic • Cognitive dissonance

6. My Mission:Improving Schools • I took my job to improve schools • My first PBS training – epiphany • Work thoughts –how can my workplace/our community support PBS? • Personal thoughts – How can this benefit my child?

7. Old School vs PBS School • Changed schools in 6th grade • School refusal/home school • Attended intensive PBS training & met principal • Allows us to compare • Benefits for Scott and for the family

8. SUCCESS! for Scott • Better behavior • Better grades • Improved reading skills • He saw his “true self”

9. SUCCESS! for Parents No more: • Negativity from others • Guilt, avoiding or explaining • Calls home or work loss More time: • Praising and seeing strengths • Bragging and being proud!

10. Relationship Transformation

11. Non-PBS School: Calls every week, multiple calls in a day I’m at Work Negative spills over to home Double punishment Frustration/ embarrassment PBS School: 6 calls all year – and 3 were calls to brag Warm fuzzies with school No work interruptions Made me feel proud of my child Behavior Benefits – to Him & Me

12. Non-PBS School: Sent home early/suspensions Stormed out of classroom Slept 2 hours/day Fought over/ refused to do homework PBS School: Problems solved in school Removed himself briefly, was flexible Fully engaged Reminded Dad about homework Behavior Benefits

13. Non-PBS School: Reading at below grade level (less than 5th) 3 F’s and a C Couldn’t remember times table – far behind PBS School: Reading above grade level (7.8) Made A Honor Roll Only ½ year behind in math But What About His Grades?

14. What’s the Difference? It’s Not about Us: • We’re the Same Parents • Communicating with school in the same way • Parenting the same way • School was difficult before • If it were about us, we would have seen results at the old school

15. Non-Believers • Some people do not want to believe: • “You don’t have the same kinds of kids we do” (right, the ones at Scott’s school had more barriers) • “You are different from other parents we have at our school”

16. What’s the Difference? • He had great teachers at his old school • He has the same IEP • Nothing else in child’s environment changed (no deaths, didn’t move, still married…) • We even STOPPED getting mental health support after changing schools … The only difference is PBS

17. What Worked? • He ran his meeting/owned the plan • The team treated him like an equal partner • They negotiated a system for behavior support • Principal connected him with a social network from the start • School included the family • School called to brag about him

18. What Else Worked? • He could leave class when he needed to and talk about what was going on • He was praised for handling his anger well • He had a mentor • He knew the adults were trying to understand and help, not “get him in trouble” • Other kids’ behavior was better (universal)

19. What about Next Year? Positive effects carried into 7th & 8th grade • Few Supports • Excellent grades • Loved school • Lots of friends • Happy, regular kid • New principal didn’t recognize old kid • “Bottom of the Triangle”

20. Summary • PBS can show great outcomes – at school, at home & in the community • Outcomes can last multiple years • I retired in July b/c my mission is being achieved … thanks to YOU!