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College Civility Committee

Achieving Voluntary Compliance: M aking C ourtesy C ommon Presented by the College Civility Committee 2009. College Civility Committee. M onroe C ommunity C ollege: … M aking C ourtesy C ommon. Scenario # 1.

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College Civility Committee

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  1. Achieving Voluntary Compliance:Making Courtesy Common Presented by the College Civility Committee 2009

  2. College Civility Committee Monroe Community College: …Making Courtesy Common

  3. Scenario # 1 You’re walking through a crowded hallway during class change and a group of 10-12 students are standing in the middle of the hall and blocking others from getting by. What do you do?

  4. “Being civil means being constantly aware of others and weaving restraint, respect, and consideration into the very fabric of this awareness.” - P.M. Forni Co-founder of the Johns Hopkins Civility Project

  5. ?As MCC faculty or staff, what is your role as it relates to civility?

  6. Survey Says…In a recent survey, what do you think were listed as the most common acts of incivility at MCC?

  7. Top 5 concerns Stealing Damaging college property Harassing racial, ethnic, or gender-based comments Not properly disposing of food and garbage Loud and inappropriate language

  8. What factors help create incivility?

  9. Factors That Help Create Incivility Stress Time Personal interest Anonymity Lack of practice

  10. Why are some people so much more successful than others at getting people to listen to them or to comply with a simple request?

  11. The “Likeability Factor”and our ability to persuade

  12. What are some things that help make-up our “likability factor”?

  13. Our First ImpressionHow quickly do people make a first impression?What image do you project?

  14. Our Smile“Don’t open a shop, unless you like to smile.”- Chinese Proverb

  15. Our Handshake

  16. or the new “Elbow shake”

  17. Our Words

  18. Our Approachability (Use names)

  19. 1936

  20. Improving Your Likability Engage others in a friendly manner Talk in the other persons interest Find something good to say Help, without being asked Show gratitude and appreciation Never be mean-spirited

  21. The Power of a ComplimentA sincere compliment is one of the most effective motivational methods in existence

  22. Spreading Kindness “Three things in human life are important; the first is to be kind, the second is to be kind, and the third is to be kind.” - Henry James

  23. What if things heat up?

  24. Keeping Your Cool…Listen attentively (let the person vent)Use the persons’ nameMaintain a calm and sincere voiceTell the person what you “CAN” do for themAccept responsibility when warrantedInvolve the person in finding a solutionFollow-upAsk if there is anything else you can do

  25. Diffusing “To win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the highest skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the greatest skill.” - Sun-tzu

  26. “Verbal Judo” advice “It’s o.k. if someone insults, resists, or attacks you. Laugh it off. Show that it has no meaning, no sting. If you fight back ands resist the affront, you give it life and credibility. If you defend yourself, you invite counterattack.” - George J. Thompson, Ph.D

  27. Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion • All martial arts are based on redirection • Verbal Judo is the use of words to achieve your objective • The goal of persuasion is to generate voluntary compliance (making a reasonable request)

  28. Empathy…the most powerful word in the English language em, from the Latin, means “to see through” and pathy, from the Greek, means “the eye of the other”

  29. The ultimate empathetic sentence… “Let me be sure I heard what you just said.”

  30. LEAPS Listen Empathize Ask Paraphrase Summarize

  31. Rudeness “If anything characterizes the twenty-first century, it’s our inability to restrain ourselves for the benefit of other people.” - James Katz

  32. How do you deal with rudeness?There’s probably a cause

  33. Tips For Approaching Others Assess the situation (Safety First) Approach the individuals(s) with respect (“Excuse me…”) Introduce yourself Allow the individual(s) to save face (spacing/posture) Speak in a pleasant tone Make a reasonable request Know when to disengage Notify Public Safety Identify witnesses and prepare to document

  34. Setting the tone in the classroom

  35. Scenario # 2 You’re walking through the courtyard and observe several people playing hackysack. It is a non-smoking area. Two of the players are smoking cigarettes; one of them discards their cigarette butt on the grass. What do you do?

  36. Scenario # 3 You’re walking through the Marketplace Café and two students are using very loud and vulgar language as they argue over who is the greatest basketball player of all-time; Lebron James or Kobe Bryant. What do you do?

  37. Scenario # 4 You are walking through the hallway connecting building 2 and building 11 (International Hall) and observe a male and female engaged in very heavy and inappropriate petting, kissing, and touching What do you do?

  38. Scenario # 5 As a faculty member, you have a student who continually interrupts the class with cell phone calls/texting/ inappropriate comments, etc.. What do you do?

  39. Life Is Like An Unfailing Boomerang “Our thoughts, deeds and words all return to us sooner or later, with astounding accuracy.” - Florence Shinn

  40. What are we role modeling to our students on a daily basis?

  41. Recommended for your nightstand

  42. Thank you!Please fill out the evaluation form and enjoy the rest of your day!

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