Listening and Responding to Others

1. 4 Listening and Responding to Others

2. Listening and Responding to Others • Communication in a Changing World • The Listening Process • Active and Passive Listening • Obstacles to Effective Listening • Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener

3. Communication in a Changing World • Listening is a major part of communication that many of us take for granted • Good listening skills are important in both our professional and personal lives • Improving your listening skills will make you a better communicator, assist you in your professional life, and enrich your interpersonal relationships

4. Communication in a Changing World “The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.”—Maya Angelou, poet

5. Communication in a Changing World • Hearing and Listening • Hearing refers to the act of perceiving sounds or other related stimuli • Listening is the process of perceiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken or nonverbal messages

6. Communication in a Changing World Figure 4-1. Communication Time Spent Listening

7. The Listening Process • Attending, the first stage in the listening process, involves making the conscious choice to listen • Interpreting, the second stage, involves giving meaning to sounds or related stimuli

8. The Listening Process Figure 4-2. Stages of the Listening Process

9. The Listening Process • Responding, the third stage of the listening process, involves any discernable reaction including both verbal and nonverbal feedback • Remembering, the final stage, involves the retention and recall of messages

10. The Listening Process “The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when one asked what I thought, and attended to my answer.”—Henry David Thoreau, author and philosopher

11. Active and Passive Listening • Active listeners focus on the moment, are aware of interactions as they unfold, respond appropriately, and are aware of distractions • Passive listeners expend little or no energy in the listening process

12. Obstacles to Effective Listening • Overcoming External Distractions • Physical Environment • Ask speaker to pause or repeat a statement • Sit closer to the speaker • Turn down the volume on electronic devices • Message Context • Understand and pay attention to the context in which we listen to messages • Media Noise • Think about the influence that medium will have on the listeners ability to understand you

13. Obstacles to Effective Listening • Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles • Preoccupation with the Self • Communicators who are consistently thinking about what they are going to say instead of listening to others miss much of the meaning in messages • Preconceived Attitudes and Beliefs • Often interfere with our listening effectiveness by leading us to categorize messages before fully understanding them

14. Obstacles to Effective Listening • Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles (continued) • Personal Investment • Personal investment can lead to selective attention, ambushing, and avoidance of threatening information • Can be triggered by semantic noise, a barrier to listening triggered by a particular word or phrase used by a speaker, or indifference, a lack of interest in listening • Indifference often results in pseudolistening, or pretending to listen

15. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Identifying Listening Goals • Appreciation is the goal of listening for pleasure or enjoyment • Comprehension is the goal for listening for understanding

16. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener “Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.”—Jimi Hendrix, rock musician

17. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Identifying Listening Goals • Empathy is the goal of establishing common ground between people by acknowledging the legitimacy of feelings and giving support to others • Expressive communicators verbally acknowledge how others feel and share experience • Instrumental communication is listening or responding to help other solve problems or goals • Evaluation is the goal of listening to render an opinion or judgment

18. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Preparing to Listen • Clear your mind • Eliminate distractions • Set goals • Take notes when listening to presentations

19. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Improving Comprehension • Maintaining an Open Mind • Recognize your own interests and biases • Separate the message from its source • Identify key points in the message • Listen for unanticipated information • Using Perception Checks • Paraphrase in your own words what the speaker said • Ask questions • Identify areas of agreement with the speaker

20. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Choosing Your Response • The response you make will influence what happens next in the interaction • Make active choices about your feedback • Be careful about using negative feedback • Validate the speaker

21. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Making Communication Memorable • Staying Involved While Listening • The best way to remember an interaction is to make an investment in it • Organizing Information • To be effective, the listener must often identify key points and regroup material

22. Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good Listener • Applying Communication Concepts • Listening and Responding During Interviews • Are your questions clear and direct? • How might you rephrase your questions if the respondent has difficulty understanding you? • Have you thought of follow-up questions that will allow the speaker to stress points more clearly?

23. Summary • By improving our listening skills, we strengthen the foundation for shared meaning in communication and increase satisfaction with our interpersonal relationships • The four stages of the listening process are (1) attending, (2) interpreting, (3) responding, and (4) remembering

24. Summary • Active listeners frequently remember more information than passive listeners • There are many obstacles, both internal and external, to effective listening in every communication situation • The four listening goals are (1) appreciation, (2) comprehension, (3) empathy, and (4) evaluation

25. Summary • Some of the ways to listen responsibly and effectively include • Preparing physically and mentally to listen • Taking notes • Being open-minded • Using perception checks • Actively providing feedback • Demonstrating comprehension • Staying involved • Organizing material and information