Coláiste Éanna Anti-Bullying Campaign

1. Coláiste Éanna Anti-Bullying Campaign Preventing and responding to bullying and cyber-bullying

2. Bullying in Irish Schools 40% of complaints to the Children’s Ombudsman in Ireland relate to school and bullying is highlighted as one of the main five issues. (Report of Ombudsman for Children 2012) Over half of young people stated that they would not tell anyone about bullying because they would be afraid that it would make the bullying worse (ISPCC’s 2011 National Children’s Consultation survey involving over 18,000 young people)

3. Most students in a classroom or school • do not bully others regularly and • are not victimized • BUT • 80% of those who join in do so on the part of the perpetrator. (Frey et al. Developmental Psychology2005, Vol. 41, No. 3, 479–491)

4. Bullying To understand cyber-bullying we must first understand bullying? Bullying is understood to be any behaviour that is • deliberate, • hurtful • repeated over time

5. For bullying to happen There must be A target and a perpetrator The presence of bystanders adds to the dynamics in the process

6. Some types of bullying behaviours we may see, hear or be aware of • Verbal - Slagging/name calling/teasing or verbally harassing • Social – Spreading rumours/ disrupting friendships/gossiping/excluding or isolating • Physical - Messing with or taking or damaging other peoples’ property • Violent - Physical aggression - assaulting in some way or verbal violence…either by traditional or cyber means

7. Some indicators that someone may be being bullied - effects of bullying • Feelings of insecurity - Damage to self-confidence/self-esteem • Poor or deteriorating academic performance – withdrawal from activities • Physical injury/torn clothes or damaged property • Behaviour/mood changes • Stress/distress – may affect sleep or eating patterns • Extreme anxiety/panic attacks, • Depression/Nervous breakdown • Self-Harm • Suicide

8. Cyber-bullying • Home should be a safe place away from bullying and harassment occurring in a social context But • Through the use of technology bullying behaviour is no longer restricted to the school yard • It is often by phone or online • and out of sight and earshot of both teachers and parents

9. (Cyber) Bullying is……. • Unwanted • Repeated over time (?) • A power imbalance • The targeted person feels socially excluded • A threat • Deliberate • Used to upset people

10. Methods of cyber-bullying • E-mail • Mobile/smart phones • Text messages • X box live or Play Station network • Instant messaging / MSN • Social networking sites • Chat rooms • Video sharing websites (YouTube) Ask fm

11. Types of cyber-bullying “Harassment”: Repeatedly sending offensive, rude, and insulting messages “Cyber Stalking”: Repeatedly sending messages that include threats of harm or are highly intimidating and make a person afraid for his or her own safety “Denigration”: ‘Dissing’ - circulating cruel gossip or rumours about a student to damage his or her reputation or friendships “Outing and Trickery”: Tricking someone into revealing secret or embarrassing information which is then shared without consent

12. Types of cyber-bullying “Flaming”: Online fights using electronic messages with angry and vulgar language “Impersonation”: Pretending to be someone else and sending or posting material online that makes someone look bad, gets her/him in trouble or danger, or damages her/his reputation or friendships “Exclusion”: Intentionally excluding someone from an on-line group, like a ‘buddy list’

13. People who behave like this…. • Think it’s “funny” • Don’t think it’s a big deal • Are encouraged by friends (get swept along) • Don’t think about consequences • Think “everybody” behaves like this • Think they won’t or can’t get caught

14. Excuses, excuses….. • “It’s fun” • “Everyone does it” • “He’s annoying” • “We’re only playing/messing” • “He’s my friend”!!!!!!!!!!!!

15. Being cyber-bullied One of the most threatening aspects of being the target of Cyber Bullying is that you can’t see the person who is bullying you and often you don’t even know who it is.

16. Parents’ role in preparing their children for the on-line world Set down family rules. Give advice for preventing and responding to bullying - and the reasons why?

17. Steps to prevent cyber-bullying Be careful when posting pictures of yourself. Don’t share • Your Passwords • Private /Personal information on line.. • Worries or anxieties you have

18. Why not? You may not really know how private your online conversation is or with whom you are sharing them There may be some who have access to your conversations who are not your friends and . . . who will share your information with THEIR friends . . These in turn, may share them with their friends . . . who do not even know you and . . . These others may share them with their friends . . .

19. Parents' advice to their children as to what they can do Bullying on the phone….. Never reply to bullying or harassment by phone Put yourself in control - store the messages as evidence Block the sender - phone networks allow you to do this Tell someone you trust that the bullying is going on

20. If it continues…. If the Cyber Bullying continues, report the problem to the school and/or depending on severity, the Gardaí. Even if the sender’s number is hidden the exact time and date are attached to messages and enable the Gardaí to check with the service provider and trace the sender of the message

21. Responding to online Bullying Never reply to online bullying or harassment Put yourself in control - store and print out messages and keep them as evidence, noting exact time and date if possible Block communication with the person who is bullying : (a) by email, by adding her/him to your “blocked list” (b) on social networking sites (e.g. Facebook) by (i) reporting the bullying to the site administrators and (ii) changing your privacy settings to exclude her/him If Cyber Bullying continues, report the problem to parents/teachers and depending on severity, the Gardaí

22. Attitude is everything!(or a large part of it) Research shows that those who Cyber Bully are often the same people who bully people directly One of the biggest drawbacks of online communication is the inability to recognise when “the line” has been crossed. Those who engage in online banter may become de-sensitised to the harm they are causing others and enjoy the thrill of the descent into serious and destructive aggression

23. Questioning Attitudes Maintaining Standards Challenging the attitudes that drive the behaviour - Why do we do these things? • “It’s fun” - “For Whom?” • “Everyone does it” - “Everyone?” • “He’s annoying” - “He is not his behaviour!” • “We’re only playing/messing” - “Playing with him or • using him as a plaything?” • “He’s my friend”- If that’s how you treat your friends… There are no excuses

24. Encourage your children … To support their friends in a positive way To refuse to pass along Cyber Bullying messages, even if asked to do so To not text, email, blog or communicate in any other way when angry or upset. To maintain friendships off line in order to help stop Cyber Bullying

25. Bystanders to (cyber) bullying One of the most important steps to be taken to combat (cyber) bullying will be empowering student bystanders-who-are-part-of-the-problem to become student bystanders-who-are-part-of-the-solution.

26. Why should they act? Frequently, the only people who know that a student is being victimized are other students. Students who are being victimized often do not tell adults for many reasons: • Too distressed • Think its their fault • Fear consequences ………. Students who report that such (cyber) bullying is occurring may literally be saving the life of another student.

27. Remember The Internet holds tremendous promise for creating a better world – a more peaceful and respectful world. But this world cannot be created through laws or through technology protection measures. We have to focus on empowering our young people with the values, skills, and motivation to make safe and responsible choices in their online world. (Willard N, M.S., J.D., Director Center for Safe and Responsible Internet Use)