Love & Romance

1. Love & Romance Biblical vs. Kosmos Views

2. Alternative Views of Romance • The Social Contract Sexual behavior is determined by social norms. Problem: since rape is historically condoned, is it acceptable?

3. Alternative Views of Romance • The Social Contract • As a Mating Instinct A sex drive - a biological function. Problem: this view lacks the sense of meaning human sexuality requires.

4. Alternative Views of Romance • The Social Contract • As a Mating Instinct • As Self-Expression The need to self-actualize: I got a need… Problem: relationships are transient and unpredictable.

5. Alternative Views of Romance • The Social Contract • As a Mating Instinct • As Self-Expression • Post-Modern: Romance is Mystical • An unpredictable “force”. • A personal preference, an “orientation”…

6. Alternative Views of Romance • The Social Contract • As a Mating Instinct • As Self-Expression • Post-Modern: Romance is Mystical • The World’s definitions… • Self-centered, conditional. • All-encompassing, utilitarian, immature, and ultimately demeaning

7. Co-Habitation Success Rate

8. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 • Nothing is more important than love: 1Cor.13; 1Jn.4,5

9. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 • Nothing is more important than love • The Bible is clear in its definition • Eros = What the world thinks love is • Phileo = Very natural, famlial… • Agape = a comittment • In spite of feelings: love enemies (Mt.5:43ff) • Definition: 1Jn.3:16,17 = A commitment to GIVE • “Fell out of love”: not possible w/ Agape • You don’t fall in love, you BUILD into love …

10. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 • Nothing is more important than love • The Bible is clear in its definition • Agape is needed to make marriage work • Love feelings desert you \ No longer a party. • NO SUCH THING as magical, sustained love • Get used to it! (else adulterous affairs occur)

11. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 • Nothing is more important than love • The Bible is clear in its definition • Agape is needed to make marriage work • Agape is a learned ability. • 1Jn.4:19 \ Goes against our natures • Lifelong habits built of loving incorrectly • Should be learned before marriage

12. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 • Nothing is more important than love • The Bible is clear in its definition • Agape is needed to make marriage work • Agape is a learned ability. • Marriage is the ultimate expression of love

13. 3. A Permanenceof Relationship. The Biblical View of Romance: Matthew 19:3-6 1. Built into our design. And some Pharisees came to Him, testing Him, and saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause at all?" And He answered and said, "Have you not read, that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, 'For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH'? Consequently they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate." 2. A Unity of Relationship.

14. Implications • Understand your uniqueness as a Christian. • Don’t team up [lit: become bound] with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever? 2 Corinthians 6:14-15

15. Implications • Understand your uniqueness as a Christian. • Understand God’s view of love and romance. • Invest the time & effort to become a good lover. • Prioritize marriage. • Flee Fornication & Adultery. “Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body.”1 Cor. 6:18