INCARCERATED FATHERS: A RENEWABLE (and UNDERUSED) RESOURCE

1. INCARCERATED FATHERS: A RENEWABLE (and UNDERUSED) RESOURCE THE OSBORNE ASSOCIATION’S NY INITIATIVE FOR CHILDREN OF INCARCERATED PARENTS PRESENTS

2. Workshop Goals Participants will learn: • Why fathers, evenincarcerated fathers, are important in their children’s lives? • How fathers parent from “inside.” • The importance of including incarcerated fathers in the mentoring process. • How to respond to the incarcerated fathers’ concerns about mentoring. • How mentors can help incarcerated fathers play a more meaningful role in their children’s lives. • How to gain access to incarcerated fathers by partnering with programs that serve incarcerated men. • Opportunities for mentoring programs to market their activities to incarcerated fathers.

3. Overview of Stats: Parental Incarceration & Children Impacted* *Source: Incarcerated Children and their Parents, Trends 1991-2007 The Sentencing Project, February 2009 In 2007, 1.7 million minor children had a parent in prison, an 82% increase since 1991. 70% were children of color. Two-thirds of the incarcerated parent population is non-white. One in every 43 American children has a parent in prison: 1 in 111 white children, 1 in 42 Latino children, and1 in 15black children. In 2007, half (52%) of all incarcerated men and women were parents.

4. Overview of Stats: Incarcerated Fathers* • In 2007, 92% of incarcerated parents in state and federal facilities were fathers. • An estimated 1,559,200 children had a father in prison midyear 2007. Nearly half (46%) of these fathers were black. • 88% of incarcerated fathers (in state prisons) reported that at least one of their children was in the care of the child’s mother. • From 1991 to 2007, the number of incarcerated mothers increased by 122% compared to a rise of 76% for incarcerated fathers. *Source: Parents in Prison and Their Minor Children. Bureau of Justice Statistics Special Report August 2008 NCJ 222984

5. Social and Emotional Impact on Children (Diversity of Experiences) Individual impact depends on many factors: • Developmental stage(s) • Prior relationship & living arrangement • Challenging circumstances (poverty, parental substance abuse) and previous losses/ traumas • Level of support child receives • Openness & ways of communicating about parent • Level of contact with parent • Whether child’s living situation changes • Whether child is already or enters foster care

6. Feelings and Experiences of many Children of Incarcerated Parents: • Loss • Isolation and loneliness • Fear (of stigma and ridicule) • Confusion • Helplessness • Anger • Guilt or Shame • Challenges in managing emotions • Problems at school and home • The assumption of being judged and even blamed when things go wrong (“apple doesn’t fall far from tree”)

7. Incarcerated Fathers and Their Children • Is it beneficial or harmful for a child to have a relationship with his or her incarcerated father? • How can incarcerated fathers stay or become involved in their children’s lives while they are in prison? • How might incarcerated fathers view mentors? • How can the incarcerated father support the mentor? And vice versa?

8. PARENTING FROM “INSIDE” • Barriers: Limited access or cost of collect calls, no call back number; no email; can’t go to school meetings or participate in children’s daily activities and special occasions and accomplishments; tensions associated with child support payments/arrears and questions of paternity. • Opportunities: Visits, special events, letter writing; sharing homework assignments/ projects with parent, parent sharing own academic experience/ accomplishments; phone calls and televisiting. “Prisoners who have failed as citizens can succeed as parents.”

9. WAYS TO SUPPORT CHILDREN AND THEIR INCARCERATED FATHER Talking to Youth about their Father’s Incarceration • Commonexperience—always an impact on some level for youth • Using language that is not judgmental: do not use terms like “offender,” “inmate,” “convict” • Bring topic up in general to acknowledge reality for many children • Don’t judge: (hold your assumptions and biases lightly); tell a positive/ relevant story (if you have one) involving an incarcerated parent   • Build trust: many young people have been lied to about where their parent is and/ or have been judged by their parent’s actions.

10. How Can Mentors Help Incarcerated Fathers Play a More Meaningful Role in their Children’s Lives? • Send a letter of introduction to the incarcerated father. • Engage children in activities that help nurture the parental • relationship (writing letters, making cards, assisting with • visits, etc.) • Assist incarcerated father in establishing a line of • communication with child’s school. • Help to facilitate and support healthy communication between • incarcerated father and Caregiver. • Assist the father when he re-enters the community, helping to • forge connections with an array of positive supports. “Families of the incarcerated are included as the warm up act, the anecdotes and the sad stories instead of as the experts.” Liz Gaynes, Executive Director of the Osborne Association

11. Parent Assumptions*(Deficit Model to Positive/ Asset Model) • The parent is the expert on his/her child • All parents have strengths • All parents want to do well by their child • All parents have something critical to share at each developmental stage • All parents have ambivalent feelings • Parenting is a process built on trial and error *Adapted from The Touchpoints Model of Development T. Berry Brazelton, MD and Joshua Sparrow M.D. 2003

12. Keeping Fathers Connected: Overview of Osborne Programs • Family Works – Fatherhood Education Program for Incarcerated Fathers; Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy; Family Centers with skills building activities; Family Counseling (planning for release and re-integration); Relationships classes; Visit Coaching; Rainbow Gazette; Graduations/Family Days. • Family Resource Center–Resource Library; Support groups; Toll Free Hotline (1-800-344-3314); Linkages to needed services. • Get On The Bus – Free transportation and sexual health information for women visiting men that are imprisoned.

13. Osborne Programs Continued • NY Initiative for Children of Incarcerated Parents - a coalition of organizations, agencies and stakeholders creating a blueprint for reform; promoting youth empowerment and leadership; and raising public awareness regarding issues affecting CIP. • Youth and Family Services-Family Ties, St James Partners for Children, Rap N Chat support group, tutoring program, and Teen College Dreams.   • Fresh Start - Trains incarcerated men, many of whom are parents, on Rikers Island with both specific job skills (culinary arts)and the life skills they need to stay clean, hold down jobs, and avoid returning to crime.

14. The Osborne Association For more information, please contact: Will Norris (718) 637-6587, wnorris@osborneny.org Tanya Krupat (718) 637-6595, tkrupat@osborneny.org Randi Blumenthal-Guigui – (845) 440-7924 rguigui@osborneny.org Weekly Family Support Groups and Hotline: 1-800-344-3314

15. THANK YOU FOR ATTENDING WORKSHOP! PLEASE COMPLETE EVALUATION BEFORE LEAVING… THANK YOU FOR ALL THAT YOU DO ON BEHALF OF CHILDREN, FATHERS AND FAMILIES!