Wild At Heart Chapter 7

1. Wild At Heart Chapter 7 • Healing the Wound • Lyrics to Desperado • The deepest desire of our hearts is for union with God. God created us for union with Himself. This is the original purpose of our lives. Brennan Manning • John favorite time with his boys

2. Boys want someone to guide them into adventure and to test their strength against • but it all takes place in the context of an intimate bond of love that is far deeper than words can express • Passage from “the Story of a Novel” 120-121

3. The Source of Real Strength 121 • As we have talked about before… guys are unanimously embarrassed by their emptiness and woundedness, it is for most of us a tremendous source of shame • But it need not be • From the beginning ours was meant to be a desperately dependent existence. • John 15:5 tree and branches • We are made to depend on God, we are made for union with Him and nothing about us works right without it.

4. “A car is made to run on gasoline, and it would not run properly on anyhting else. Now God designed the human machine to run on Himself. He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other.” C S Lewis • This is where our sin and our culture have come together to keep us in bondage and brokenness, to prevent the healing of our wound. • Our sin is our fierce determination to be independent and to rely on anyone – especially God

5. Again look at our movies James Bond and John Wayne and all the other “real men” and what they have in common. • They are loners, they do not need anyone. • We come to believe deep in our hearts that needing anyone for anything is a sort of weakness, a handicap. • That is why most men will never stop to ask for directions. • How did Jesus live His life • He lived in desperate dependence on His Father

6. “I assure you, the Son can do nothing by Himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing” • “I live by the power of the living Father who sent me” • “The words I say are not my own, but my Father who lives in me does his work through me” • “The Father and I are one” • Why is this important? • Because many men live with a deep misunderstanding of Christianity and their relationship with Christ

7. Remember that Masculinity is an essence that is passed from a father to a son. • The true essence of strength is passed to us from God through our union with Him. • King David’s words in Psalms (page123) • King David was a true man that is unashamed to admit his desperate dependence on God. • Men are typically quite harsh with the broken places within them. Many report feeling as though there is a boy inside and they despise that about themselves. • But that is not how God feels about it • He is furious about what has happened to you.

8. “It would be better to be thrown into a sea with a large millstone tied around the neck than to face the punishment in store for harming one of these little ones” Luke 17:2 • Think of how you would feel if the wounds you were given, the blows dealt to you, were dealt to a boy you loved- your son or grandson. • Would you shame him for it? • Would you feel scorn that he could not rise above it all? • No, you would feel compassion • Movie clip GWH

9. It is no shame that you need healing, it is no shame to look to another for strength, it is no shame that you feel young and afraid inside. • It’s not you fault • It’s not your fault

10. Entering the Wound 125 • Frederick Buechner’s story • The Sacred journey quote • That is the way we are with our wound, especially men. We bury it deep and never take it out again. But we must take it out again and enter into it. • John’s story 126-127 • We fight this part of the journey. Our false self is our defense from entering our wounded heart. It is a chosen blindness

11. “our false self stubbornly blinds each of us to the light and the truth of our own emptiness and hollowness” Brennan Manning • A wound unfelt is a wound unhealed. • We must go in • The door to your wound may be: • Your anger • Rejection you have experienced • Maybe failure • Loss of “golden bat” • God’s thwarting your false self • Or you may still be unsure but in any case you should pray this simple prayer.

12. “Jesus , take me into my wound” • “Behold” He says, “I stand at the door and knock…”

13. Healing the Wound 127 • Movie clip BV • The Way in which God heals our wound is a deeply personal process. • Look at how He healed the blind, never the same way twice • With spit • With spit mud • By speaking • With touch • By kicking out a demon

14. There are no formulas with God • For some of us it may be a divine moment • For others it takes place over time through the help of another or others. • John’s friend Brent 128 • Masculinity is bestowed by masculinity • Healing never happens outside of the intimacy with Christ. • The healing of our wound flows out of our union with Him.

15. Restoration of your heart begins with surrender- yielding your life to the One who is our Life. • Then invite Jesus into the wound- to meet us at our broken and unhealed places of our heart. • Christ came to redeem us not just forgive • Isaiah 61:1 • Christ came to heal the ________ set us _____ from ________. • This is the central passage in the bible about Jesus and His mission. The one He chooses to announce His ministry. Luke 4

16. But you can’t do this at a distance, You can’t ask Christ to come into your wound, while remaining far from it. • You have to go there with Him. • We must grieve the wound and admit that it mattered in our life. • Grieving is the only honest thing we can do. For in grieving we admit that we were hurt by someone we loved and/or that we lost something very dear, and it hurt us very much. • Few men are ever so vulnerable as to simply let themselves be loved by God.

17. Brad’s story revisited 130 • Abiding in the love of God is our only hope and the true home for our hearts, not just mentally acknowledging… • George MacDonald quote. 131 • St John of the Cross quote 131 • Email 131 • The Apostle Paul warns us that unforgiveness and bitterness can wreck our lives and the lives of others. Eph. 4:31, Heb 12:15 • Forgiveness is setting a prisoner free and later discovering the prisoner was you.

18. Robert Bly quote 132 • Forgiveness is a choice • “Don’t wait to forgive until you feel like forgiving; you will never get there. Feelings take time to heal after the choice is made” Neil Anderson • Forgiveness is not saying • It didn’t really matter • I probably deserved part of it anyway • Forgiveness says: • It was wrong • It mattered • I release you

19. God’s name for us 132 • After we invite Christ into and journey with Him into our wound and forgive those who have hurt us… • We need to ask God to father us • And to tell us our true name • George MacDonald quote 133 • Adam, Abraham, Jacob, and David all learned who they were out of their intimacy with God, with the Father. • Who can give a man his own name? • God alone

20. For no one else really sees what the man is • We usually sees this with a sense of guilt- yes God sees me and what He sees is my sin…. This is wrong on two counts • First your sin has been dealt with.. The price was paid. He has removed it from you. • Psalms 103:12, 1 Corinthians 6:11 • God does not have one condemning thought for you . Romans 8:1 • We are promised a new heart Ezekiel 36:26-27 • Too many Christians live in the old covenant Jeremiah 17:9

21. They believe their heart is wicked or bad • But that is not the rest of the story… Jeremiah 31:33 • Paul writes in Romans 2:29 • You have a new heart • And your heart is GOOD • What God sees when He sees you is the real you, the true you, the man He had in mind when He made you. • Dave’s story revisited 134 • You must ask God what He thinks of you and you must stay with the question until you have the answer.

22. This is where the battle will get fierce • This is the last thing the Evil One wants you to know. • He will play the ventriloquist, he will whisper to you as if he is the voice of God. • He is the accuser of the Brethren Revelations 12:10 • John’s Gladiator story 134-135 • Aaron’s message 136 • It is a battle to get to this place and once words like these have been spoken the Enemy rushes in to steal them • He did it to Christ Matthew 4:1-6

23. In order to withstand these assaults we must hold to these spiritual truths found in scripture. • We are forgiven • Our hearts are good • The Father’s voice is never condemning • He knows us and knows our true name.

24. Out of the wound comes our glory 136 • Until we are broken, our life will be self-centered, self-reliant, our strength will be our own. • So as long as you think you are really something in and of yourself, what will you need God for? • Don’t trust a man who has not suffered • Don’t trust a man who has not faced his wound • Who would you call at 2:00 in the morning when your life is crashing down around you? • One of the posers you know or a man that has walked the road with God?

25. “Where a man’s wound is, that is where his genius will be” Robert Bly • It is only when we enter the wound that we will discover our true glory. Why? • First, The wound was given in the place of your true strength, in an effort to take you out. Until you go there you are still posing, offering something more shallow and insubstantial. • Second it is out of your brokenness that you discover what you have to offer the community. • The false self is never wholly false… 138 • That is when we are ready for battle • Chapter 8 A battle to fight: the enemy