Effective Communication Skills

1. Effective Communication Skills Self-Assessment Exercise

2. Instructions • There are 22 questions • Mark a, b, or c according to the one that best describes your communication style.

3. 1. When conversing with others, • I usually do most of the talking. • I usually let the other person do most of the talking. • I try to equalize my participation in the conversation. The best answer is c because conversations should be a balanced two-way flow of dialogue.

4. 2. When I first meet someone, • I wait for the other person to make the introduction first. • I introduce myself with a smile and offer a handshake. • I hug the person. The best answer is b because it is good to initiate the introduction and introduce yourself with a handshake and a smile to build rapport.

5. 3. I usually • “warm up” new conversations with small talk. • avoid small talk and jump into more important matters. • avoid starting conversations. The best answer is a because it is good to initiate a conversation starter.

6. 4. • I make an effort to remember and use peoples’ names. • I don’t pay attention to names as I tend to forget them. • I only learn the names of important people. The best answer is a because calling people by names makes a good lasting impression and makes them feel important and special.

7. 5. • I frequently use courtesy words (please, thank you, you’re welcome, I’m sorry). • I occasionally use these courtesy words and phrases. • I never use these courtesy words and phrases. The best answer is a because regular use of these courtesy words/phrases show politeness and built rapport.

8. 6. • I tend to be serious and don’t smile often while conversing. • I smile all the time while conversing. • I smile at the appropriate times while conversing. The best answer is a because smiling when greeting people and at appropriate times greatly helps build rapport.

9. 7. While conversing, • I make eye contact. • I sometimes make eye contact. • I never make eye contact. The best answer is a because making eye contact gives the impression you’re interested and engaged in the conversation, and that you have good self-confidence.

10. 8. While conversing, • I hold my head still at all times. • I nod my head at appropriate times. • I nod my head constantly. The best answer is b because occasional nodding shows you agree or understand and also helps to build rapport.

11. 9. While conversing, • I stand one foot away from the person. • I stand 2-3 feet away from the person. • I stand 5-6 feet away from the person. The best answer is b because an arm’s length is the appropriate distance so the other person does not feel uncomfortable or threatened.

12. 10. When I talk to a person who is sitting, I often . . . • stand. • sit. • lean down. The best answer is b because communicating at eye level builds rapport. The only exception is walking into the office of a superior; then ask permission to sit before taking a seat (or wait to be invited to sit).

13. 11. To end a conversation, • I often just leave. • I begin to look impatient hoping the person will get the hint. • I wrap up with a closing statement. The best answer is c because it is best to bring the conversation to an end by making a polite closing comment or gesture, such as “It’s been good talking to you.”

14. 12. If a co-worker has put on weight, • I say nothing about it. • I tell the person that he or she has changed in appearance. • I honestly tell the person that he or she looks fat. The best answer is a because it is best to say nothing. Never say anything that might hurt or offend the person. It’s called being tactful! Give compliments only and only say things that will make the person feel good.

15. 13. When I’m listening to the speaker, • I often cross my arms over my chest. • I often lean back and turn my body away from the speaker. • I often lean slightly forward and face my body toward the speaker. The best answer is c because leaning slightly forward and facing the speaker shows you are interested. Arms crossed over your chest shows you are defensive; leaning back shows you are bored or disinterested.

16. 14. When I cross my leg, • I cross my leg facing the speaker. • I cross my leg away from the speaker. • I bob my foot. The best answer is a because crossing your leg toward the speaker shows you’re interested. Crossing your leg away from your speaker shows defensiveness or disinterest; if you bob or swing your foot, it shows anxiousness or nervousness.

17. 15. While listening, • I tend to be distracted by things going on around me. • I listen for meaning and ask questions. • I watch the person speak, but I don’t “hear” a word. The best answer is b because if you’re a good listener, you keep mentally busy searching for meaning in the message and ask questions.

18. 16. When someone talks about an unfortunate or sad event, • I don’t comment on it. • I try to change the subject. • I try to relate to the person’s feelings and show sensitivity to his or her misfortune. The best answer is C because showing sensitivity to another person’s feelings builds rapport.

19. 17. When I discuss a topic, I tend to . . . • talk about and focus on positive (good) aspects. • talk about and focus on the negative (bad) aspects. • complain. The best answer is a because focusing on the positive draws people’s attention in a favorable way. People are generally more attracted to a positive person.

20. 18. When I have a negative opinion or comment, • I just say it. • I lead in with a positive comment first. • I say nothing. The best answer is b because it is best to say something positive first, then express a negative opinion or comment in a tactful way.

21. 19. When I receive unfavorable feedback, • I note where I need to improve. • I get angry and defensive. • I deny the problem, make excuses, or plead ignorance. The best answer is a because it is important to know what you do well, but it is equally important to know where improvements can be made to increase your chances for success.

22. 20. When I give a person negative feedback, • I focus on the person’s observable work or behavior and offer suggestions. • I focus on what I don’t like about the person. • I simply tell the person what to do right. The best answer is a because you should focus on and communication your observation of the person’s work or behavior, not focus on nor judge the person.

23. 21. When I disagree with a person, • I listen first, ask questions for clarification, then disagree non-judgmentally. • I quickly point out the person is wrong and why. • I say little or nothing. The best answer is a because it is okay to disagree but it is important to disagree agreeably!

24. 22. When I’m in a group, • I tend to frown a lot. • I tend to smile and use humor at appropriate times. • I tend to be serious. The best answer is b because a smile at times is always appropriate and humor is beneficial for group dynamics.

25. In conclusion, write a personal summary of . . . • 1) your ability to communicate effectively, and • 2) what you feel you need to improve on.