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SENTENCE LEVEL EDITING. GOAL. To discover sentence fluency errors, to work on choosing stronger words, and to start playing with your sentence structure. WORD CHOICE EDIT 1. Put squiggly lines under words that seem weak, or informal. Especially look for the following: GOT/GET/GETTING/PUT
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GOAL To discover sentence fluency errors, to work on choosing stronger words, and to start playing with your sentence structure.
WORD CHOICE EDIT 1 • Put squiggly lines under words that seem weak, or informal. Especially look for the following: • GOT/GET/GETTING/PUT • BAD/GOOD/SAD/PRETTY/REALLY/VERY • 2nd and 1st person (I, me, mine, you, your yours, we, our, ours, us) • Words that are used incorrectly • Mark these with WC
WORD CHOICE EDIT 2 • NOW solidly underline words that you think are effective: • Words that offer strong description • Verbs that show action: (example: instead of got, found, lifted, discovered, purchased, etc.)
EDIT 3 Highlight the first three or so words in each sentenceto look for repetitive sentence openers. Is there an alternative way you could phrase things? Remove weak sentence starters like There is/There are and rephrase.
EDIT 4: Partner read out Read each sentence of your essay out loud, starting with the LAST SENTENCE. Sentences should stand on their own, and you should be able to tell what is going on. If you cannot, then mark those sentences with “C” for Correct
Sentence Opening ideas • Start with adjectives or adverbs. • Deep green, shiny, and clear, the emerald sparkled in the jeweler's case. (adjectives) • Loudly and insistently, my mother called me to dinner. (adverbs) • Start with a prepositional phrase. • During rush hour, I avoid the freeway. • Start with a participle or participial phrase. • Shouting his dog's name, Ross headed for the park. (present participial phrase) • Cooked to perfection, my father's meal beckoned us to eat. (past participial phrase) • Start with an absolute phrase. • All things considered, it was a good day. • You can also use more than one of these options, as in the following example: Quickly, without fanfare, Eliot handed out the gifts. (adverb + prepositional phrase)